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 Posted: Mon Jan 04, 2016 10:32 pm
 & Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren mimics Illo and creates a visible throne from chaos and sits smiling. Seemed like the monk had reached an eppifany. Weather or not it was well founded was another story. It was true in every encounter she'd teased him,and made him question himself. However,was it done with evil intentions or was it just the way the Kitsune behaved? Could Ren have really planned this from the beginning;purposely testing Illo,or was it random chance. Even if Illo didn't realize it he had inadvertently met all,but one member of Ren's organization. They had all meet up after Ren,and Decus's trip to the future and discussed him among other things. That said how could Illo truly be certain? Ren always seemed to know more than he at every turn,while the monk only knew what she allowed him to. If you don't mind I'll close my eyes. As I don't need to see you, to reach you. I am capable of seamlessly adjusting to any situation. I have "plans within plans" and "thoughts out of the bubble". I can clearly see into a persons Chaos: their weaknesses and frailties...I know just what to do in order make one suffer, to feel sorrow or hate. This is all familiar to me. My curiosity can easily overcome your principles, motivation, reasoning. That's why I'm powerful. No matter how you look at it, my reasoning is more than yours. You make the assumption that I'm evil, yet you haven't even seen my power yet. Your thoughts are so unstable at this moment. So many questions,and no way to be sure if the answers you come up with are true or false. My own mind is now drifting...drifting to foreign realms beyond the understanding, and comprehension of your species. I am the fox treads upon the Sea of Chaos,and carries weight of its depths in my soul. I am a loving older sister,a proud mother,beloved friend,and powerful warrior. What are you?
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 8:29 am
 There was a certain comfort in that predictability; those with plans within plans might toss in some predictably welcomed chaotic antagonisation to offer Illo, who was shook more by the semblance of kindness and conscientiousness than any of the more--you could say--aggressive tactics she'd employed prior, simply to restore his confidence for a moment. That was just as likely as the demon being in Illo's head. Without being too heavy-handed, let's just think of the powerful things Illo's mind was capable of. For the moment he'd allow her to return to that old enigmatic villain-not-villain he knew her to be, seeing that this was proving the point he'd made earlier about her antagonising him as well as going to great length to establish the remnants, whom he didn't ask the nature of, could be considered a type of tulpa from Ren. If Ren wouldn't say outright, and even better if she wanted to make this a game, Illo would play along in silent and unravel her. This was, after all, the man whose power was contingent on him contemplating infinity.
"I see..." He said taking a moment to sit up a little. "I won't pretend not to have any weaknesses then; but you shouldn't pretend not to be tired, resting your eyes like that." He stopped himself there shifting to a more relaxed position with his hand supporting his head and his legs floating like a flag in the wind.
"To answer your question would insult your intelligence, wouldn't it?" He began with a shrug. "I'm simply a man who strives for the Truth. You've heard what they call me: Demon Slayer, Mystic, etc.; but I'm not so sure any of that means anything to you. My past is a legend in the mortal realms, my future is identical to my present. I seek the Self, and it finds me in a place without time or concept to dilute its perfection. I---" Illo stopped, as if seized by a searing pain.
"--I have found it! I've found this thing which we must call perfection. Listen to me, young one..." The voice being heard was delivered via telepathy. It was obvious by the way Illo was clutching his head that this was not a game. Something was clearly happen, something big.
"Focus on... The Self. Nothing else is important..." The voice being projected was Illo's, but it sounded different: more confident, but at the same time wary and a bit forlorn. It trailed off into the void, untraceable by Ren or anyone else. Illo slowly unfolded. He'd unknowingly levitated several stories above the conversation. During the event he was rolling and twisting and screaming, but he hadn't known. All that was real to him was this unreal feeling: caught between what he knew to be real but could not be described as such, and what he'd found to denounce was to shut out what he could see as reality. He drifted down to the ground and collapsed for a moment; obviously coming to grips with something his vision had told him alone.
"I'm... I'm sorry about that." The look on his face was much more defeated than Ren could have elicited from him. He was practically catatonic. "That's never happened before." Would Ren know this was the future version of Illo speaking? If so she'd know that version had attained the enlightenment this monk sought and gained absolute power without her. Suddenly the meeting about him in the future seemed justified.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 10:04 pm
& Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren perhaps truly knew what Illo wanted better than he did. When she was a child an she lost her mother she'd realized the path to "Self" wasn't the path to true strength. She'd watched as her home was burnt to the ground,and her family was killed in cold blood. How could the monk understand. Each remnant from Ren embodied a part of her true Self. Hakudoshi;her protective nature and cool allure,Egil;her madness and intellect, Yakumo;her nurturing and kindness ,Shiranui;her confidence and fearlessness ,Azar;her maturity and power,Hasuko;her chaos and killer instinct,all made with love. Ren had toiled countless years becoming in tune with them learning and growing from her time with them. Thus her soul was strong enough to shoulder the burden of her ancestors Chaos and bend it to her will. From the moment she'd picked up her fathers blade her resolve was unwavering. The mind should be pure, uncontaminated by self-serving distortions and preconceived ideas. The mind should be flexible, able to change shape according to the situation without resorting to rote learning. Water is pure and flexible. I am like water. Because of that, I'm untouchable by you; I have nothing holding me down. I am able to move in such a way, allowing myself to battle in any way I feel like without being leaving myself vulnerable. On the other hand, you have distracting thoughts and preconceived notions of salvation thru trivial understanding.
Ren bangs her hand down,fist clenched. She couldn't except the monks foolishness. The sky starts to darken,and the space around her forms cracks like glass. Quit fooling yourself! I have much more experience in a mere iota of my soul than you have in your entire being. The true reason you focus on yourself is because you have always been alone. Even when you find what your searching for what then? Are you willing to ignore everything and everyone you know! I've met many people throughout my lifetime, each one unique in their own way. They were all interesting people, people who I had the privilege of bonding with in one way or another. Some of them became close friends whom I love dearly, others became allies I could fully depend on; I even have a few strong & foolish kids here and there. Not to mention many vicious enemies because of either my upbringing or old line of work. There are even people I have a neutral stance towards. There are some who don't last long enough because of various reasons, whether it may be personal or some unforeseen circumstance. She opens her eyes;Crimson slits with purple sclera that seem to swirl with chaos. Silhouettes of the Rantō members appear along with some of Ren's family. She glares at the monk. Each one of those bonds I made means a whole a lot to me; I cherish them close to my heart. They helped me grow as a fighter and develop as a person; they give me the knowledge and wisdom I need through their overall actions, whatever their intentions may be. They help me get through this tough existence we like to call "life". It's not something to be taken lightly. I think that without them, I would be the opposite of who I am — hallow, depressing, and void of life entirely;like your trying to be. I would never tapped into my potential and become as strong as I currently am now. It might sound sappy and cliché, but it's the truth. I am nothing without those bonds. If you keep this path of yours up, you'll never be a match for Rantō.... or anyone else at all. You'll be deemed as a liability to me. Now, clear your mind and come at me like your world depends on it. Try your damnest to kill me. Anything less is a mere waste of my time.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2016 11:07 pm
Illo, still recovering from what he'd just seen, shook his head at the appearance of the old, angry, negotiator he'd come to know only through a really embarrassing whim of Chance. She did love to scold him about his choice to follow the Divine... Why was that? The way he saw it, Ren could have been hailed as a wonderful practitioner of Materialism the way she went on about the value of, well, material things which, sad as it was, and perhaps the source of great frustration for her, included things like friendship to the staunch Advaita Vedantist in Illo; bringing eternity into question--and infinity as well--was always a bit of a red flag for those who clung to life; the strength which Ren clung to hers, long as it was, was all the evidence one needed to establish a link of this sort. But that was just one facet--following the pattern--of Ren. This time around was much different. Ren seemed genuinely upset over Illo's choice. Talk of liability affirmed this to be tied in deeper than the man understood, which had always been from the point of view of "do what you want, you're still stupid and it irks me."
Instinctually Illo upped his power to where it had been before. It seemed to be enough to hold off Ren's frenzied aura, but that was about it. He didn't understand, and, as Ren might say, he could not understand, what was so dangerous about himself or why they should fight. Let's remember this was the second most constant figure in Illo's life outside Melanie, and even she'd left leaving a regrettably large hole in the monk's steel heart. But somewhere in that soup of thought the voices of a better self, a perfect Self, echoed through to him as though madness and distress were their medium. Illo took a lotus position.
"... If I do, what would happen?" He began with a surprising amount of poise. "Other than the obvious, I'd be doing exactly what you ask of me; how could you respect a doormat like that?" He took a deep breath in and evenly exhaled it. It looked as though his soul saluted his stand by becoming more balanced and steady. "Come on, Ren... Why do you really want to fight me?" His stare was unnervingly unwavering, practicing Za-Zen right here in the middle of what looked to be a warzone in the making.
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Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 1:24 am
 & Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren mimics Illo and creates a lotus flower covered in fox motifs under her out of the throne. She takes the same position as a manifestation of her power slowly manifest. Illo's wavelength destabilizes where his and Ren's intersect. The chaos thickens making a large part of the area around them dark and hazy. You can not accept that you don't know why you exist, yes? Always wanting an answer. That is the nature of the animals called "humans".To put things simply, if your past makes your present... Then your present can and will make your future. When you think about it that way... You absolutely have the potential to be anything you want to be, don't you agree? So why waste that potential on this self indulgent goal of yours. It's truly infuriating... I despise people like you who put their own humanity in jeopardy for some glorious, hopeless cause. If I can, I'd like to bring back what you've lost, what you threw away to pursue this path you've chosen. True to herself", "True to myself". We all have our own personal image that's dictated by others, one that's always off the mark. We wish to remain true to ourselves, but who gets to decide who we are as people? When our image never goes hand-in-hand with reality, where can we find something genuine? Where can we find our true selves?
Does this world feel like hell to you? Of course it does, because it is. So take it all in, don't even blink, Illo. There's no place like hell! Your kind made it so. With your lust, and greed. It always comes down to this. Life is desire. It's what humans do. When desire meets desire, the stronger survives. The predator will eat the prey. It's dirty, and cruel. But just look around you, there is so much beauty in this truth. And yet you still look away. And you waste all your time alone in your head. Don't deny your desires. Hell is the real paradise for you. And you, my friend, are in paradise! Don't look away, Illo! There's a limit to the strength of people who are isolated.
Lightning and thunder sound as Ren's power climbs. The Sea of Chaos rising;seeking to drown the monks being in its depths. Ren's full soul starts to form one tail after the other. The silhouette's shatter and dissolve. Illo, stop it! Do you know what that path will do to you?! You'll become one of Self's monsters! Retain your humanity. Don't succumb to the power! Either side, it amounts to the same deal: whether in the name of the divine or the demonic, you're still a monster in the end! Do you intend to use that path of ideology...to become nothing but a scrap of divinity yourself?! This duel...between us...would you really push it this far - into the realms that lie beyond the realm of mortal life? A monster such as myself...a creature with a chaos... in my mind,body,and soul. I am to be defeated, it must be by a human! Don't do it, human. Don't become a monster...a monster like me...If you try to acquire something, you'll lose something else along the way. That's the truth of your world. No matter how sad it is.Only a human can destroy a monster. Only a human could dare hope to.
The cracks in the air become larger,and seem more scar like. Ren for suddenly changes to form Illo is most familiar with. With this declaration Ren looks at the monk finally answering his question in its entirety.
Still.... This is your life right? Then decide for yourself! If you want to protect everything with your hands then do so, if you want to abandon everything then do so. But, what do you yourself want to do right now? Can you really be satisfied giving someone else that you don’t really understand so much power over you that would cast away your humanity?
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Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 12:24 pm
Ren had a few points of interest to the philosophical mind. Taking aside her initial agreement with the first two Noble Truths, her equation with anything that wasn't immediately Heaven to be Hell was something the Kantian thinkers would have eaten up. There was also an outlining of the problem of wanting less; that is to say that desire for the more humble aspects of life were in fact vanities on par with those Ren displayed. Illo's quest, as Ren had voiced on numerous occasions, was one of self gratification to the highest degree: to become perfection itself. There was also the terrifying proposition that the whole thing could be nothing more than a wild goose chase. Invoking the paradox of the self observing the Self, Ren had brought to the conversation the likes of Spinoza and Barkley. The feasibility of the conscious self being to observe itself without any mediation of modification seemed asinine to the logical being, but it should be reiterated the Buddhist doctrine of Nibbana being incomprehensible seems to be summarising a similar detail in that salvation is the consciousness and the knowledge sought is the meditation; the guru remains the guru, and while the problem remains the same for both analogies it should be noted the Buddhists say Nibbana is not to be understood by those outside of it and becomes instantly perfect in concept to those who attain it, leaving such paradoxes obsolete.
This next part was interesting. Was Illo a monster? Was it monstrous to throw away the people in your life for what Illo had come to understand as being the ultimate connection with everything? That's a little heavy-handed. First, it should be noted that while it was true that for a moment, in the eyes of eternity nothing, that Illo would have to abandon what he knew, who he knew, in order to pursue this goal theirs was an illusory, that is to say incomplete, understanding/image of their relationship. When stacked against perfection, what title should hold up? The problem with arguing two sides of the effect, the personal and interpersonal, was that the personal had to be identified as something less than its perfection, that is to say by relating it to other's perception--outlined earlier in the argument as a mode of understanding the enlightened self, I might add--was tantamount to the process of reconciling language as in any instance an absolute link from one person's thought to another. However, if we dredge up relativism we quickly see that there a very real dichotomy between what the traveler and the observer experience. Melanie's future troubles were proof of that...
And now even Ren was beginning to lose her composure. Try as she might, the scar-like tears in the air gave her away more than her words could hide; and they didn't even hide much! Desperation, now talk of monsters and--defeating Ren? Illo thought about this for a little bit, taking the moment as his own.
"Ren... You can't pretend anymore. I see through you. We want the same thing." He let his guard down, let the chaos emanating from Ren wash over his mortal form and swallow him like a great wave.
A tense moment went by as Illo was completely hidden by the darkness. It was too quiet to assume he was being killed by it, but there didn't seem to be any sign of him. Inside his mind innumerable utopias and Hells played out their eternities before him. The mutability had taken full advantage of the instability of Illo's mind and proved a powerful catalyst to his wonderment. It was the fear this brought, the fear of uncertainty, however, that put Illo off more than the Pandoric proliferations presented to him. For a moment he clung, felt himself clinging, to the things he'd come to know as certain, but eventually he began to see what the purpose of this chaos was, to stir that beast which lay dormant in him. Soon it was clear to him he needed nothing of the sort: not the comfort of the impermanent things, nor their antithesis in infinite stagnation. He'd been taught better than this, and thanks to this feeling he was able to overcome the initial shock of leaving the Monastery.
Inside the cloud of chaos Illo had let himself go, just as he used to in his old meditations, but something had started to happen. Something drastic, something uncontrollable even with the power of chaos. This was a power on par with none that could be mustered by Ren's realm or any other realm. First it would feel as though Illo's energy was shooting up to levels similar to the Lucrum Labs incident, but soon the presences of three others could be felt. These were enlightenment demons, and as far as conceptual power goes they had no equal. Soon the chaos would melt away to reveal Illo sitting in the middle of a giant eyeball: his soul.
"You're not talking about us, are you?" Said one of them as it circled the monk. "Wise as you are, we still need the boy to do some work for us. We'd appreciate if you stopped what you're doing here. And even more if you--"
"No!" Illo, eyes closed, clenched his fists and gritted his teeth below all the swirling insanity. "I won't let you control me! You're not perfect either... There's only one perfection, and I'm not stopping until I have it. You're just as trite as Ren, preaching happiness through worldly concepts; don't you know nothing can describe the Truth?" The deities around him started cackling and howling at this, for to them they were the only perfection attainable by mankind: Man's desires and attributes taken to their highest.
"You're still a part of me, and one day I'll destroy you..." Illo began resonating harder than he even had. It was his only shot at containing the catastrophic power these gods held! It sounded like an OM, but as it climbed higher in frequency it began to lose its definition until there was nothing but a high buzzing sound, and eventually that too was too rapid to be recognised: a superliminal sound; if you will. Cackling like mad, the Enlightenment Demons began to be sucked in to the monk's crown. A blood-curdling scream could be heard, but Illo's lips were sealed.
The pressure in the area began to dissipate as they were absorbed into the Phoenix. Ren's energy would feel more room to extend if she felt like it, demonstrating the terrifying power these beings held. After it was done Illo collapsed to the ground, barely holding his head from bouncing into the cold dirt as he crashed to his knees and fists. Heaving, blind, Illo's third eye began to dim. Slowly the world came back into focus. The first face he saw was Ren's as he turned to the Kitsune with a weary but confident look.
"See... There's not concept I can't conquer. Eheh... Sounds to me like you've had a similar journey." Only if form, perhaps. Illo's stakes were, if we're being fair, a bit higher than Ren's after seeing what the Demons were packing.
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Posted: Wed Jan 06, 2016 11:09 pm
& Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren could see them. Those being inside Illo for she'd an her ancestors played thier games once. For the briefest moment her form change into her clans progenitor; a human like Kitsune who is colossal in size he has white hair which is shoulder length fox ears, wears gray pants, and has nine fox tails which are flame like in appearance. Long ago those same demons that used the monk as thier puppet began to fear the power that he, a mere creation they made, had and tried to killed him. In retaliation he ravaged the lands of heavens and escaped below. During this he'd met the very demons that plagued Illo,and used Chaos to combat them. For what was Chaos? .
An immense and inexorable force, that acts with no unified purpose or will. Where the chaos leaks into the mortal realm, the laws of the physical world are undone. This paradoxical energy seeks to return all existence to some unseen realm. The formless or void state preceding the creation of the universe or cosmos. More specifically the initial "gap" created by the original separation of heaven and earth.
Over the course of several hundred years, I've seen many ages end, conflict between ideology, hatred, those in search of something greater. I always have hope that the new age will purify all of that. How many times has it happened? People repeat themselves. They commit the same mistakes, over and over.... They haven't survived, not in true sense. So I chose to embody the concept of Chaos. For is life itself not Chaotic? Unstable,Ever Changing,and at times able to defy existence? Still I can't help you.
Without love, people could exist without knowing truth and falsehood. By knowing it, they cry and grief and get lost. She was the same back then. All truth is meaningless when you cast everything else aside,as even once obtained what you cast aside you soon regret. What if that fruit you've worked so hard to nurture gets pulled off the branch the next morning? You'll regret that you didn't choose to harvest it the previous day instead of complaining. That regret really hurts. It'll make you crawl through hell. Regret... It's a heavy burden. You can't help wondering if maybe you chose the wrong path. Because once you've chosen, you can't change your mind. The truth is unattainable to an individual.People become themselves through their encounters. With different things, people, and emotions.
For those that list those as material,and cast them away,the truth will always be shrouded in fog for them. Though you reach the murk and the gloom to grasp something, you have no means to know it is the truth. In which case, why...? What sense is there in yearning for the truth? The truth has no meaning in itself! This is... the truth... of the world. I suppose in the end all she wanted for you.......is for you to have no regrets after all is said and done.
Rens figure returns,and her power subsides back into her. The cracks dissipate into the hazed,as Ren draws every trace of chaos from Illo. The result becoming a dark purple, diamond like jewel with Ren dispels quickly. If you're goal will bring you great happiness, it requires great effort in exchange, that's called compensation. For the good things in life, there are the bad. For the bad things in life, there are always the good. In order for you to be happy, you must be willing to accept a burden of a equal amount of unhappiness in exchange as your payment. The more you achieve, the greater the demands will be placed upon you in return. It may cause hardships to others, but you want it. That's your free will right there I suppose. Your life is your own business . I won't interfere anymore. No matter what kind of choice you make, it will be the result you chose... As long as you're not regretting the result, it is all right. What matters is that you come to that decision yourself. That you agonize over it and eventually accept it.I was just the same. Don't you understand, this is how I became what I am?
However, basic rule of negotiating is to consider and respect the other person's feelings. I suppose I haven't been keeping to that rule as of late. Our relationship has already been formed. No matter how trivial a meeting and the incidents that have past,and are to follow may seem, a relationship is made. Even if it is just for a short amount of time, a knot that has been tied does not unravel. It means that during your lifetime, every incident that passes has meaning. The meeting between you and I also has meaning, so remember it.
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Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2016 9:39 pm
Illo for all he was worth was trying to pay proper attention to the magnificent apparition before him. His eyes were distant, and it was obvious he was tired, but something else was there. The spark of passion that last collision had ignited something within him, and there was no way to stop its cleansing fire from coursing through his entire being. Finally he was on his feet as Ren was giving her advice on effort and achievement.
"You're afraid I'll become some kind of monster?" The past had started to come back to him now. "I don't understand, but I suppose we can chalk that up to inexperience, can't we?" That smirk of his, as if never heard any of the grim warnings Ren issued, or could hear them for that matter, made a late entry to the party; it'd been gone so long it felt like a new face was trying to hijack the monk's countenance, and in that moment Illo looked just as he did those years ago at Ren's cabin in the Rockies.
"Shiroyasha," he began with a serious but warm tone, "do you remember how this negotiation started? Have the terms changed? You... You said a lot had changed."
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Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2016 9:59 pm
& Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren holds her head and laughs for abit. All this time the monk was one of the few who still called her that,but she supposed that was fine. With her eyes bathed in Chaos she didn't see the monk,only a fiery Phoniex standing before her. Of course it has. Humans are ever changing. Ever since that day....I've been keeping an eye on you. The beings you've encountered,and the power you obtained. I'm impressed with your growth. Now then... I must bid you farewell. However, the parting need not last forever...I'll see you when the time is right.You called me negotiator just now didn't you. Tell me is it appropriate for me to play that role?
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Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2016 10:23 pm
Seeing his old friend(?) laugh like that really did Illo a lot of good. He joined her, though he did sound tired. No doubt he'd sleep well tonight. But just think of the gains he'd made! Controlling the Maras again? Maybe Ren was right to be impressed with him.
"Honestly? No," Illo said through chuckles. "... But that's a little bit my fault too, isn't it? I'll tell you what," Illo said as he straightened out his tunic, "I'll keep improving until I attain the Truth: you get to watch me so long as you stay out of my way. Deal?" He gave one last smirk and turned to start off on his long path. He had taken a few steps when the thought struck him.
"Oh, and no more intimidation games. I find it rather distracting." And so he went, a drifting star in an endless night: the beginning which could not be told.
{exit}
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Posted: Thu Jan 07, 2016 10:43 pm
& Hakudoshi ☸ ☸ ☸R enyoku S hironami G itsune ☸ ☸ ☸ ☸
Ren smiles and vanishes.(exit)
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Posted: Sat Oct 08, 2016 11:50 am
 -Shuang yú zuò--Party: Alone -Mood: Fatigued -Charge: 0% *grrrr* Shuang's stomach growled as he pulled himself along the ground. It had been a year since he left home, and had now arrived at the infamous Death City. However, the journey had not been treating him well given he was starving and at a loss of energy.
He let out an exhausted groan and whispered "Someone.. please feed me.." and passed out shortly after. When Shuang came to he was lying in a warm bed with the smell of finely brewed tea in the air. He looked around with a confused expression and thought to himself "Where am i?" Just then a young woman entered the room with a tray of tea and set it down on the night stand, next to the bed. He stared at the woman before him not speaking a word. An abrupt sense of embarrassment came over him and he put his hand to the back of his head. "Oh my apologies miss! I d-didn't mean to stare.." He said fidgeting about. She grew a warm and cheerful smile followed by a slight chuckle. "It's quite alright" she said "I saw you laying unconscious outside of the Death City gate. Nobody else was helping so.. I thought maybe i should!" The smile remained on the girl's face through the words she had spoken. Shuang turned his gaze down toward his lap. "Such a kind soul.. I can already tell" he thought and a smile of his own formed.
The girl invited Shuang to stay overnight to regain his strength and he accepted her offer. The two stayed up for a small amount of time after that, talking and sharing their stories, but before long Shuang had grown sleepless and dozed off.
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