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 Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:16 pm
Honestly, I know I am a nobody. Everyone uses me and then I am nothing to them. To everyone I am just a listening ear and then when I need someone to listen to how I feel no one is around or available. But that's not what this was about...kind of. Well....maybe...I don't know. The main reason I wrote this is because, honestly, I need to tell someone how depressed I am getting but no one will listen....not even my boyfriend.... My birthday is August 22. Why am I telling you this? Well my entire family has decided to give me total solitude on my birthday. My mom and step dad won't be home, they are going to the casino. My aunt, uncle, grandparents, and cousins are all going to florida the week of. And well, my. Boyfriend and friends have been ignoring my calls lately when I ask if they would like to do something. The whole reason this is depressing me so much is because this is the third year this has happened...when I turned 16 no one even gave me a second glance when I was 17 I had to make a cake. No it wasn't even for me it was for my step-poppop whose birthday is the day after mine...and now this year. My dad killed himself last October so I won't even get to see my sorry excuse for a father. My grandma and aunt of his side hasn't even spoken to me since. So I don't even count on anything from them. I'm not even materialistic. I just want someone to acknowledge I'm another year older and to say they are happy for me because I'm not like a lot of the teenagers you see who are into drugs and sex or alcohol. I'm clean, I'm a straight A student who got into a college and will be the first in my family to even attempt going to college. I don't even know what the point of posting this was, no one will bother to read it..I'm just not worth the life I have been given. Each breath I take could be another for a person with more potential and worth. If I was gone who would miss me? Scratch that if I was gone every one would say they miss me but in their hearts and minds they would be thinking thank god. I don't know why I even try. Even as an artist I seem to fail and never be good enough no matter how hard I push myself, I can't make anyone happy. Well thank you to whoever read this far...if anyone....probably no one.....sorry I waisted your time...
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Posted: Fri Aug 10, 2012 11:45 pm
Please don't give up your faith in humanity. You're not wasting our time, you're making it more precious. My brother passed away when I was 8 years old. It will always get better, I can promise you. Please don't commit suicide or attempt to harm yourself. We're all here for you, to listen and to help. Suicide is an eternal solution to a temporary problem. You may not think so, but everyone cares for you in some way, big or small. If your boyfriend is such of an a*****e to not even to listen to you, especially on your birthday, then you shouldn't be wasting your time with him. Your friends are also being turds, and I think you should have a discussion with them about that. Your birthday is important, and people should be paying attention to you. If you need someone to talk to I'm always here smile . You can friend me and send me a PM if you need to talk about what's going on. Actress_gone_wild666 is my username. I'd give you my email, but you'd think I was being a creep. lol. I'm here to help, though.
Happy 18th Birthday!!!
<3
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:02 am
Hey, I don't know how any of that feels so I'm not going to say that I know your pain, but I will tell you that just about everyone in this guild is here for you like Actress says. Trust me, sometimes there's no one better than your internet friends, they'll help you any way they can, and do anything they can to make you better. And no matter what, you can always go to them when you need to talk about anything. So no matter what, remember that there are people who care about you, even if they aren't close enough to touch or see.
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:21 am
I am unable to say i fully understand your pain, but i do understand some of it. I can say this though, if the people you love,dont acknowledge you like you think they should then just stop caring, like they seem to not care. This happened to me, i had a boyfriend and some friends who acted the same, after i dumped them and moved on in my life i met people who actually cared about me. They've been with me for two years and we're going on for our 3rd. So, if your boyfriend isnt even listening to you, dump his sorry a** because he doesnt know what he's missing, and those friends of yours forget them too, find some new ones,or let them find you. Happy Early 18th birthday wink this is my first time responding to someones feelings, so i really hope i didnt offend you in any way emotion_c8 .
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:23 am
You are the apple...
I'm always available as an ear to hear (er, eye to read?) so if ever there's anything you want to vent about, talk about, want advice on, anything, just drop me a PM and I'll do my best to help you and support you. For now, I must sleep, but as said, just drop me a PM with anything that's on your heart and mind and I'm fully available to talk/listen.
and I am your core.
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 1:17 am
You're awesome, and you'll pull through. You can confide to anyone here, as they obviously care for you, as do I! There's always time to be depressed, hopeless and generally sad, but you can always look on the bright side! Pull through, like I said and be strong! I can always crack a joke if you'd like.
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Irako of the Desert Vice Captain
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:07 am
You have something to offer the world. It's not your fault the people around are blind to it. We haven't overlooked you here. You're turning eighteen finally! That means you can go where you want, do almost anything you want (except legally drink alcohol), and know whoever you want to. If your family and your boyfriend don't start treating you better, maybe you should take the chance to start over and go someplace else.
Also, I'm with Actress_gone_wild. If the guy who's supposed to be boyfriend doesn't want to treat you like a princess on your birthday, then you should dump him and find somebody better. You don't have to take crap like that from him or anybody.
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:49 am
I'd like to preface this from a Christian perspective and ask the members respect my view. Thank you.
One thing is certain: people will always disappoint us. It is foolish to expect divine goodness. Also, our perceptions are flawed from time to time. I won't get into the whole satan deceives us bit, but people are prone to blindness of self.
Depression sucks. Been there. One would have to be pretty sheltered never to feel that way. The world is corrupt, selfish, vile, and just plain ugly BUT we endure. We have to. One owes it to oneself.
If you like to ask me about my faith, or just my general opinion, feel free to do so. No matter what people say or do, Jesus loves you, and that's all that really matters. Doesn't matter what I think. It doesn't even matter what you think about yourself because our perception is so tiny. So, hang in there please. I'll be praying. God bless! heart
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Puppet on a String Theory Crew
Philosophizing Bibliophile
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 11:53 am
My face is reflected in the water...
It's a shining grin full of hope... To start off, I want to tell you that, we all have to face troubles through our lives. May it be hardly anything, or huge issues, we all face troubles. Look, we all bleed, and we all have the same things to go through. No matter what you think, you are not a nobody.
I understand your pain of being ignored, of being alone. Solitude is the worst kind of pain. But, no matter what your present, or even your past, is like, you can't dwell on it. Instead of dwelling on what happened in the past, and what's happening now, you should look onto the future. And not just looking at it like it's just another day, just another petty excuse to be around. No, you have to look at it optimistically. We all have a reason in life, you just have to find that reason.
Look, you are who you are. And since every individual is different, in reality, you are unique.
Regarding your not thinking anyone will read it, or that you're not worth being alive, you're wrong on both parts. Maybe the life you know isn't what you want it to be, what it could be, but you can't let that rule over you. We can all change from living through depression, sadness, and solitude, to a better life. I can say so for a fact, because I took that 36O degree turn, myself.
At that, I want to tell you, it does get better. It always does.
If you want any more help from me... Please, go to my profile and click the "Help Page" tab on the lower right hand corner. ... Or it could be a look of somber silence struggling with fear...
What do you see reflected in your face???
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Posted: Sat Aug 11, 2012 12:09 pm
Hey! I’m talking! cat_scream
1.you have it better off than people i know
2. i wanna see your art
3. happy birthday
4. emotion_hug
Ok, I’m done. Go back to your babble
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Posted: Tue Aug 21, 2012 8:21 am
● When I read this topic, I noticed it's the 21st. Happy Early Birthday! emotion_kirakira
Anyway, don't let them get you down. In the end, you live your life the way you want to live it. You'll have some way to live it. Besides, if you die, who knows what will happen. You might just end up having another life, and that life might end up being worse than the one at the moment. It'd be pointless to live like that.
Make good use of your life, and fufill everything that you want to do. Make no regrets.
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