Welcome to Gaia! ::

Hmmm I culdn't help but my attention getting real caught at your last response in saying:
"I understand what you're talking about when you say you would rather feel lonely then the pain of a broken heart, but you get a choice to feel lonely. My loneliness isn't by choice, it's because no one wants me. If I could say that it was my choice I could at least feel a little bit better about myself, but I really can't. "
I bring this up because hiya, I'm another lonely (but slightly proud) people not by choice. Actually the other day I was crying because nobody ever wanted me. I have a very dear friend who I confided in, I'd allow you to see some of it, but it was rather personal considering she's one of the first girls I suppose you could say I fell in love with (Well... not that I've decided if I believe in love and she's actually gender neutral... plus I've never really met her ^^; ).
Well anyways my point is I do not get the choice to be lonely, and even if it still hurts once in a while, I learned that it's okay to be alone and I can still be happy. Of course I still get sad,but hey everybody does, so goes life.
I must say I respect you for offering your heart out those two times, there's lot's of people, myself included too scared to take all that risk at once. I know your pain about just wondering and wanting, but maybe it's just not your time yet. There's no line however and eventually these things happen.
As for your actual questions (as I'm sure my rambling isn't much help).
I would say it's completely normal, I may not be normal myself but I know others as well, so there's nothing wrong with it. Everybody wants companionship, except the Aromantic, they're pretty happy on their own. Of course you shouldn't beat yourself up, I mean I've convinced myself I must be broken, but it's really not the case, love doesn't come so easily to some as others. There's those of us who get it a little tougher, and my kinda optimistic side likes to think that means it'll make things when I find it a little sweeter. Nobody has to deal with being alone as a person but sometimes you have to learn that it's okay to not be in a relationship for a while.

Also this may not be a problem but it's wise advice my mother once gave me so it may help. You don't want to throw yourself at the first people to show interest if you aren't interested either or don't want to seem "easy". So what I'm trying to say is perhaps is the first opportunity that comes your way may not be best for you. So remember that it is okay to extend your time being alone.

I'm sorry my nonsense will stop now, I shouldn't write advice when I'm sleepy.)