|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:11 pm
Character Name: Rondelle Magnus - Strictly goes by Magnus unless the other person knows him well.
Player Name: Trixsy
Race: Majin
Stage: Reaper
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Height: 6'1"
Build: Magnus is all muscle, having hardly any body fat on him. His clothes generally hide his physique, giving him a fairly unassuming look since that makes him appear more lanky, but when wearing more casual garb it's clear to see how fit he is.
Skin tone: He's fairly tanned from spending a lot of time outside. Other than his scars he has a pretty even complexion.
Hair: His hair is long, going down to the middle of his back, though he usually ties part of it back, leaving just the front free - in this way he seems to guide his movements to his hair partially shields the right side of his face where he has some vicious scars. His hair color is black with some dark reddish brown highlights that tend to only show up in the sun.
Eyes: Magnus' eye color is a dark crimson, but only one of his eyes is actually real. The right side of his face that he'll hide sports diagonal scars that go across his face and over his eye. The original eye was damaged and he could no longer see out of it, so he had it replaced with a fake glass one. His left eye, however, changes shades depending on his mental state due to an experimental potion he worked on with his druid caretaker. It was one of his first appearance altering attempts and it was the one that went awry. If someone is familiar enough with Magnus they can gauge his mood by his eye color.
Dark crimson - neutral... he's as normal as he'll ever be
Ruby - heightened emotions, usually on the more positive or manic side
Coral red - heightened emotions, on the negative side
Pale red/pink - sick, moody, snappish and at his weakest - in truth suffering from magic withdrawal
Scars: Three claw like slash marks along the right side of his face that go in a diagonal path.
Along his throat is a single jagged scar, an injury that nearly killed him as a child. He received treatment but because of it his voice is rough and gravelly.
His upper arms have a myriad of scars... most light and criss crossing over one another though there is one deep scar on the inside of his right wrist that's rather concerning...
Finally there's a wicked scar that goes across his chest... another that could have killed him though he survived... luck of the devil this one.
Armor: He doesn't wear traditional armor, he prefers to move quickly to avoid damage, though he does wear heavier leathers that are able to take more damage than plain clothing.
Weapon: As a reaper he of course has his trusty scythe. It's taller than he is and made of an ebony material. It doesn't appear to have any ornamentation, and while fairly plain, Magnus feels the only thing it needs is the blood of the wicked to decorate it.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:14 pm
Aspirations: Stay secret, strong, and dependent while assisting other Majin. To continue this he seeks to become a Black Heart. Ideally he'd like to reveal himself and show that even Majin can do the job of a Reaper or Black Heart, though he doubts he'll ever have the courage to do it.
Personality:
The Magnus that acquaintances, other Reapers, or Black Hearts see is quite different from the real Magnus. In order to keep people from getting too close, he adopts the personality that will be the opposite of interesting to them.
Magnus is adaptable and a good actor, so the only trouble comes from being in a group. He tends to be more quiet then, not attracting too much attention. Within the reapers he's a model of good behavior and obedience, doing what he's told without question. He enjoys his training and the only people that might see a genuinely pleasant Magnus without knowing him too well would be those working with him.
While he has no problems hunting down Witch Eaters, on occasion he's been sent to go after a Majin suspected of going down the wrong path. It's harder for him, considering his compassion for them, but he's never failed in a mission and never gives anyone a reason to doubt him.
The true Magnus is a completely different story. Outgoing, manic, aggressive, and ruthless, these sides come out when he's fighting or doing his work to help a Majin. When he's helping others, or when he's hunting down magic for himself, he changes his appearance to keep himself hidden. "Being someone else" lets Magnus be himself, oddly enough, as he has no fear of retaliation or of being found out. After all, if one appearance attracts too much attention he just won't use it again. A few of his potions have actually made him look like a woman, and he has a ball with that. He finds getting hit on very amusing!
If you've found out Magnus' secret and know that he is a Majin... and he hasn't tried to get rid of you, and you haven't turned him in, there will be an uneasy truce of sorts. Given every situation is different but in most cases Magnus will think the worst is coming at any moment. A new level of trust will need to be earned before Magnus will believe that the friendship is genuine. He doesn't have anyone in his life anymore that knows his secret... if that were to change someone might see genuine fear in the man.
Intelligent... Magnus learned a lot from his Druid caretaker. He has an extensive knowledge of potions, though his field of interest is narrowed down to those that can alter one's physical appearance.
Bloodthirsty... Get in a legitimate fight with Magnus and see the claws come out. He'll do whatever it takes to win, and should he defeat his enemy he will display that victory in a gruesome manner. In some cases he uses it to spread his reputation. There are many that have heard of the displays he's made of Witch Eaters, done as a warning and a promise. He also does it for himself. There will always be that part of him that hungers for the magic of others. The more sadistically he kills an enemy, the more he tells himself that it's good enough... and it's also to remind himself that the same will happen to him if he slips.
Protective... If Magnus has decided to protect you, he'll do so come hell or high water. He hasn't had any friends in a long time, but when he's committed to helping a Majin, though he has to do it secretly, he'll go to any length for them. He's changed his own appearance countless times to throw others off the scent and helped other Majin get fresh starts when needed. He'll never get thanked for it, as none see his real face, but that doesn't matter. If he ever heard that one he protected was hurt, he would have vengeance, but if he ever found out a Majin he had helped had become a Witch Eater he would be the first to hunt them down. He will help any Majin he can... Witch Eaters deserve only a violent death. He sees them as the murderers of Majin.
Lonely... In truth Magnus really is a lonely man. He keeps others away and knows why he has to do it, but now and then he sees others and wishes he could be himself and join in. It's because of this that on a rare occasion Magnus will behave normally around a select individual. It's usually spontaneous, usually around someone he never expects to see again.
Temptation... Magnus struggles every day with his hunger for magic. When his battery is "full", so to speak, he can handle it fairly well, but if he's weak, running low on magic, or injured there's a voice in his head that becomes harder to ignore. Sometimes he thinks he's going insane... having mental conversations with himself where one part of his mind hisses at him, urging him to give in while the normal part of him continues to shove that other voice into a dark corner. At it's worst, Magnus will even cause physical pain to himself as a distraction. Losing to that dark part of himself is a constant fear. As a result to this constant hunger for magic he is...
Insatiable... Magnus always seems to be eating something, thinking about what he's going to eat next, or talking about what he's going to eat when he returns to a place with food. He eats all the time as a distraction from wanting to "eat" magic... similar to how a smoker will chew gum to deal with their cravings.
Likes:
Solitude
Nature
Training/Getting stronger
An occasional drink
Druids
Thunderstorms
Most animals
Children
Dislikes:
Witch Eaters
Fire
Hot weather
Sweet foods
Critiques
Being idle
Ability Concentration/Theme:
Flame in the darkness...
While Magnus prefers physical attacks, and his scythe, he is of course still good at something! He wouldn't have gotten this far otherwise. He doesn't use his magic much, as doing so results in heavy fatigue and a need to acquire more magic from other sources... but when he does use it, the displays are impressive. He specializes in fire, or heat based magic. Because of the fire that consumed his childhood home he has a mental block when it comes to conjuring flames, he is quite talented at something else... temperature. He is able to alter the temperature of a small to mid-sized area nearby... either around himself or nearby, and can either produce his own "climate control" - which is frivolous and he never does, or he can use it to suffocate his enemy with heat.
The more power he uses, the higher the heat and feeling of suffocation from the air around his target being manipulated. On a few occasions Magnus literally boiled his target alive... though he typically vanishes for a time after doing so. As stated, it takes a dangerous amount out of him. However, if his enemy is able to counter it and they let Magnus essentially wear out his battery, they might find a completely different sort of opponent. With training he could learn to get through his fear of flames to utilize them in magic, but it will take a genuine effort.
Tea: Brew together the following: Chameleon tongue, burnt flowers, graveyard dirt, a crow feather, poppy seeds and a "generous drop" of rum and you have Magnus' tea, which he calls Two Paths in private.. to others he claims it's called Trail of Death. He often uses the tea to meditate on the choices he's made, the path he's on, and the path he must avoid.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:14 pm
Short Biography/background: Magnus doesn't like to think about his childhood... he knew he was a Majin as early as he could remember. He was raised by humans, not his biological family, and they made sure he knew what he was and worked with him on how to control himself, how to blend in, and how to accept himself. In truth, Magnus was a normal, healthy child. He had a lot of friends, he was quite social, but when he was eight his idyllic existence was destroyed by anti Majin extremists. You see, he wasn't the only Majin under his parents' roof. As there are extremists that hate, there are also extremists who love and his parents had made it their mission to take in "stray Majin children" to love and teach.
It was a massacre. Magnus remembers it all... the stench of blood, the raw screaming... the only thing he doesn't remember is how he survived. He had returned home to a fire and ran inside to find his siblings, to try and get them out of the blaze, but inside he saw only burning and bleeding bodies and heard screams from other parts of the house. He ran from room to room, coughing as his lungs were assaulted by the stench of smoke and death. The last thing he remembered was rushing into an upstairs room and came upon a cloaked man pulling a bloodied blade from a small body. His alarmed shout got the unknown man's attention... and then Magnus felt a shock and reached up to grab his throat, pressing against the blood flowing from the wound there.
Everything went dark and when he came to he was buried under the smoldering rubble of his one time home. Weak from blood loss and in pain, he dragged himself into the nearby forest where he fully expected to die, and in truth it's amazing he didn't. He managed to get himself to one of the tall trees he used to climb and curled up beneath the shade, not making a sound, not even crying. It was chance that a Druid came across the wounded boy and without a second thought took Magnus under his wing... healing him and nursing him back to health. The Druid wasn't a prying sort, and since he could see that Magnus wasn't exactly in the best situation, he offered to let the young Majin travel with him. Magnus agreed, and everything he learned he learned under the tutelage of the strict Druid he called "Uncle Rem".
It wasn't long before Magnus came to the realization that he wanted to help other Majin. There were many that had been like him, abandoned and picked up by caring individuals but were simply dealt a bad hand... there were even more that had no idea what they were and simply needed guidance to keep them from becoming the monsters society feared they could be. He hated the evil Majin just as much as any extremist, perhaps more, since all they did was make it more difficult for those that wanted to exist with everyone else. Learning how to alter another's appearance became vital for smuggling known Majin to safety or helping others get a fresh start. A day eventually came where he left Uncle Rem to join the reapers. It would become the platform Magnus would use to help the good and punish the bad, as violently as possible.
When he separated from Uncle Rem, the wandering druid was no longer part of his life. It was an agreement they made the day Magnus left. If Rem wasn't around, no one could connect them and potentially find out Magnus' past and true origins. They don't keep in contact at all, and Magnus doubts he'll ever encounter his savior again.
Known for his ruthlessness, he displays the butchered remains of those he kills as a warning. Majin seeking his help learn of secret meeting places through whispers and rumor... finding abandoned buildings or secret groves in the wilderness. Magnus does nothing to make others suspicious of who he might really be, as he keeps the knowledge that he is a Majin from everyone, including the other reapers. He even keeps his identity from those he helps, using temporary potions to change his appearance to one more... agreeable and trustworthy looking. It wouldn't do for a Majin to be greeted by a boogeyman!
Magnus knows that if any of the other reapers found out his secret it would mean very bad things for him, but as far as he's concerned his position helps him find those that he needs to help or punish. He's learned to hide himself well and while the allure of devouring another's magic entirely is always there, he controls himself well. He tries to stay in heavily populated areas, siphoning miniscule bits of magic from the multitudes. However, should he become stranded somewhere, who knows what could happen...
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:15 pm
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sun Jun 10, 2012 8:16 pm
Updates
6/11 Bio used and updated from raffle flat sale. Open for crits.
6/13 Made a few changes to personality, magic, and bio to clarify some things and fix a few others! THANKS YORU! Keep the crits coming o uo
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2012 12:16 pm
Before I make any headway reading this.
Can I ask a favor.
Paragraph spaces please TT x TT Walls of text scare me.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jun 11, 2012 12:20 pm
Added moar spaces! biggrin
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 11:30 am
You said he doesn't have anyone left in his life that knows he's a Majin?
How about his Druid Caretaker?
I'm not to sure about his very outgoing and aggressive persona.
I mean it might drive out others but some are attracted to that sort of thing
or it may inspire very negative emotions, enough to make others hate him.
And you know how some people like to keep an eye out for their enemy #1...
it might be a sort of bad idea cuz it might lead others to suspect that he's a majin
and a potential Witch Eater especially since Reapers and Knights are very paranoid in that area.
Also about his ability. It's weird.
If you mentioned air based then it should be the ability to
maybe solidify air, increase wind velocity and maybe gather enough
wind to blow your opponent away.
Yet you describe him boiling. Air =/= Heat
Heat would be in a fire based magic.
Or if you would have said, he redirected hot air from a
source of fire close to the enemy..blah blah
Also coolness is not really brought about by air.
Air is just another conductor and vacuums are not hot.
His Biography is fine. XD
Read it back when you applied for him.
Just also would be great if you added a post about
his secret organization. >>;
I mean he's still a reaper which is pretty much lower class
Knight. Meaning probably stuck doing training a lot and getting
mentored by Knights who are no doubt extremely experienced in spotting
Witch Eaters...how does he do his Majin helping activities under
that much supervision?
Sorry. TT x TT I'm really er...picky on details. >>;
You did ask for a critique XDDDDD ?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 11:59 am
No that helps! I wanted critiques to see if there were things I should clarify or change! :3
-He isn't with the caretaker anymore. Once he went to join the reapers he left the druid and he actually doesn't know where to find him anymore. They don't keep in any sort of contact.
-I can add in with his personality that if someone seems attracted to the way he's acting he'll change and be more distant, cold, or boring. He basically will adopt a personality that the other person doesn't want much to do with. If someone persists in keeping company with him he might even just "mysteriously vanish when they're around" XD
-The way I had his ability in my head was he speeds up the molecules around a person to change the temperature? It makes sense in my head XD Maybe I should change it to something more like he's just able to adjust temperatures in the air?
-I can add more about his secret doings!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 1:54 pm
Then you should have mentioned that fact XD So no confusion about how his caretaker suddenly went poof! Not to mention for having taken care of him from such a horrible situation...it's a weird plot hole to just disappear not to mention he left no impression on Magnus...even a name? After taking care of him so long? >>; It's a bit more than heartless for Magnus to forgive and move on.
Yup. That's a good thing. Maybe add in that he has a pretend personality or a mask that he puts up around people of being meek or boring? But when he's fighting the Majin battle and doing secret stuff the wild and mean Magnus comes out? Like around Reaper his is Magnum Lite = goody two shoes or at least mild mannered and rule follower and KILL ALL WITCHEATERS AND MAJINS! But when he's doing the Majin saving missions, we get to see the REAL Magnus emerge. The one who's daring, witty and slightly ruthless. Cuz I mean..his cover has to be GOOD to hide being what he is in an organization as ruthless as the Blackhearts.
If you really want to stick with temperature.
You have to go with heat and fire as his element and not nature.
Speeding up molecules is how you start fires and is basically what fire abilities mostly are. >>; It doesn't make sense in conjunction to air abilities really. That's me though. Speedy vibrating molecules causing energy production which causes heat....but if you added that to air abilities then that's already two elements in his ability. And not one.
XD I read too many Super Power stories. Lol.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 2:36 pm
That makes sense and heeelps! biggrin I'll make some adjustments tonight.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 12, 2012 10:06 pm
There, made some changes. o uo
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 4:14 am
Better...I think. XD
Now you just have to apply for approval.
Either Chocorette or Akira-kisho I think. ;D
I'm just an artist here and not an RP staff XD
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jun 13, 2012 11:54 am
I posted in the "HEY LOOK AT MY APPLICATION" thread so... just waiting? :3
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
