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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 10:20 am
I have been single for two years. Am I ready for a boyfriend? Yeah, but I'm not rushing it at all. I just live life like normal and see what happens.
Well. I have two guys. One (Who I shall call Man) and the other (Who I will call Boy).
I have known Man for three years. We've been on and off. But he's mature (and he's only two and a half months older than me.), sweet, and knows me very well. Boy is only a year older than me, and just creeeeeeeeeps me out. He is usually lurking, stands there waiting for attention, and will not look at me in the face and tell me something.
I sat on the couch in the townhouse the other night, texting Man (who only has a slight depression problem, I was cheering him up with some motivation at least) and Boy sat next to me, quietly. He does some typing on the phone and it proceeded to be a text message to me asking me if he offended me in any way because I'm not talking to him.
Um. Yeah. You just texted me this question while sitting next to me as I am trying to help out someone I care about.
Now, I have sat next to Man on the couch. At least he will look at me, despite what I am doing and at least talk to me, whether serious or not. And won't touch his cell phone at all to do it. So, when he turns, looks at me and says "Want to make out?" I have no problem going "Sure!" and making out with him.
On the same night of the texting issue. I left to go to my friend's apartment to grab my hoodie and came back. As my friends opened the door, they proceeded to ask me "What is the Elvish word for friend?"
Being the big LOTRs fan I am, I know that answer perfectly. "Mellon."
I have never told Boy that I love LOTRs. Last night after returning home, I get a text message of him asking me if we could hang out and watch LOTRs.
The only way he would know: My Facebook. Under my interests. Movies/Books. #1 spot.
I really don't like it when a guy uses my Facebook as a way to get to know me. I hardly update some of the things on it anyway.
I have also noted that Boy does have more emotional troubles than Man does. Man is only slightly depressed, as I have told you, that just a few words of encouragement and he's fine. Boy... well. There's two giant holes in the townhouse caused by one of his episodes. A friend of mine was embarrassed to tell me that when I asked what happened to the walls.
I really want to have nothing to do with Boy at all. I'd rather go with Man, who knows me without the need of a social networking website and can handle things like a man. Boy scares me, creeps me out, and I'd rather save everyone the trouble of another emotional rampage and just avoid him altogether.
What do I do without causing too many problems? And yes, I plan to speak to Man about this problem.
Future Notes: - I am visiting Man in early June in his hometown for future school needs. - I live far away from Boy. Thank goodness. Although he'll comment, like, etc. everything I post on Facebook now.
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 11:25 am
I think you should just tell boy that you do not want to be with him and to leave you alone. Either that or create a new facebook and not tell Boy about it... That's all I have got. I hope you come up with better solutions and everything works out.
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 11:54 am
Hey! I’m talking! cat_scream
isn't there a way to block a person from commenting on your posts and stuff on FB?
Ok, I’m done. Go back to your babble
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 5:23 pm
I am looking into those options, but my biggest worry is telling him off will equal in him freaking out. He's been emotionally distraught for years.
But it also comes to face to face contact. I've done everything possible to not stand next to him. He inches his way over until he's standing next to me or gets a seat next to me. That's all he did at the townhouse when I attended a party and was watching friends play beer pong. He's been doing that since the first five minutes I met him.
He also, which I realized I forgot to mention, wants to pamper me like a princess. I got a wicked nasty sunburn and I did tell him off when he goes "Oh, I see you got burned from attending graduation. If I could, I'd go to the store and get something for you and rub it--" "NO."
It's to a point I don't want to be alone in the room with him at all. emotion_facepalm
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 6:26 pm
Oh, I completely understand what that's like. I think you should just block him on Facebook, or just get a new Facebook. If he's making you uncomfortable, you should kind of try to subtly tell him off, tell him you're not interested. If he freaks out, the best advice I can give you is run. /: Stay away from chairs though, I've heard that it's the go-to item for frustration, apparently. (I've had two chairs thrown at me after freak-outs) It's better to have taken the risk than to just avoid the problem.
I should go practise what I preach.
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Posted: Tue May 22, 2012 6:46 pm
Cut off contact with Boy, but before you do tell others of what you're going to do in secret. This way, if something goes wrong, they'll know exactly who caused it, and doing so in secret will prevent him freaking out and accusing you of slandering him.
Aside from that, I've got nothing.
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Posted: Wed May 30, 2012 8:39 am
I agree, I think that cutting off contact would be best for everyone in the situation. It will probably hurt him, it might even make him have a bit of an episode. BUT, in the long run, it will help him hopefully move on to some other person, and will allow you a peace of mind as well. <3
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