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 Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 2:25 am
Ok I got dumped, and I have gotten over it. I'm currently trying to be acquaintances and its been going ok. Just figured itd be best to tell beforehand right? But the whole reason has upset me, and it's been gnawing me in the back of my head. Apparently I acted too much like a friend. But it was really out of the blue, and she even said she had been thinking about it for only a week. Then to make herself feel better she plans it on a day she's going to a party. Then starts saying how immature I am :I. And bragged about how she might go to prom with a senior (we're freshman) before I used reverse Psycology and showed her they'd both just get hurt without her knowing I knew (badass right?).
My best friend took my side but shes a mutual friend. While my ex tried getting her to get to talk to her she almost caused an asthma attack from stress. It came a little bit after she left and another mutual friend who was helping my ex with trying to talk to my bestie ran-like-hell in tears. Luckily I popped up by her locker to say hi and calmed her down before it got serious. Again badass, right?
So I would like to have some second opinions mostly for having a clear mind. Was the reason she gave good or kind of out here? Also who's in the right here, me or my ex? I'm going to talk to her about it and ask for her to not do that again, best friend almost having an asthma attack doesn't sit right. And no, it's not going to be one of those whiney 'take me back!' arguments. If she wanted me back I'd probably laugh. So I've gotten over her, just to restate that. Also I am immature to an extent because I'm a class clown type of person, but it was never a problem. And thus this teenage boy asks for advice.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:09 pm
She sounds like a user to me, but I think the whole 'Senior' thing was to try and take a jab at you. Well done for not taking the bait.
From a girls point of view, she is way too immature. How were you treating her like 'just a friend?' may I ask? I live with my boyfriend and some days we just treat each other to a kiss and cuddle, either because we have work or it's just a lazy day. What did you do that was so wrong? Did she give you a reason?
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:27 pm
Okay, with the "just a friend" thing, I think it depends how long you two were together to figure out whether that's reasonable. The rest of it makes me think your ex is a b***h and she was just trying to get at you.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:28 pm
In all honesty I don't know. I made an effort to kiss with her when I could and joked around doing the dorky things (she ate that up) that parents nab at their sons to do with their girlfriend like pull out the chairs and open doors. Because I am a dork. I stopped being all kissy like that a week before because she was having issues with her mom so I just tried to be there for support and not seem so pushy to kiss or anything when she was upset. Her reason was that I seemed more like a friend than a boyfriend. I think I'm acting maturely despite everyone saying I shouldn't try being her friend. I still get annoyed when I'm near her, since since I'm human and emotion driven, but I don't want her to change the way I act. I was only openly rude with her the next day I saw her but that's a given. And all I did was walk fast past her when she tried getting a friend to get me to talk to her.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:29 pm
SKBCTayuyaFluteofDeath Okay, with the "just a friend" thing, I think it depends how long you two were together to figure out whether that's reasonable. The rest of it makes me think your ex is a b***h and she was just trying to get at you. 5 months. Not bad for my first actual relationship, right? Lol
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:33 pm
Tsuki the Lunar Wind SKBCTayuyaFluteofDeath Okay, with the "just a friend" thing, I think it depends how long you two were together to figure out whether that's reasonable. The rest of it makes me think your ex is a b***h and she was just trying to get at you. 5 months. Not bad for my first actual relationship, right? Lol Not bad at all. Since you were together that long, I'd say it's not a very good excuse. I just got out of my first relationship as well, but it was mutual, and we'd only been together for a couple weeks before I told him I thought of him as only a friend. Of course, we're also classmates, and only see each other once a week in that class.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:35 pm
Tsuki the Lunar Wind In all honesty I don't know. I made an effort to kiss with her when I could and joked around doing the dorky things (she ate that up) that parents nab at their sons to do with their girlfriend like pull out the chairs and open doors. Because I am a dork. I stopped being all kissy like that a week before because she was having issues with her mom so I just tried to be there for support and not seem so pushy to kiss or anything when she was upset. Her reason was that I seemed more like a friend than a boyfriend. I think I'm acting maturely despite everyone saying I shouldn't try being her friend. I still get annoyed when I'm near her, since since I'm human and emotion driven, but I don't want her to change the way I act. I was only openly rude with her the next day I saw her but that's a given. And all I did was walk fast past her when she tried getting a friend to get me to talk to her. Are you sure she is sixteen? She sounds so immature it's ridiculous. You are sounding more and more mature. I mean, instead of going to you ant talking with you sensibly she tried to get a friend to talk to you? I stopped doing that when I was ten. What next, is she going to start passing notes in class? I say you dodged a bullet there, my friend, keep being awesome and the right girl will roll on by.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:39 pm
I can see what she means by the 'Just a friend thing' it's like saying things were too platonic between you two (though that being said you're in school, so it's not like she knows what else is out there exactly...)
regardless good job shrugging off the Senior thing (there's really only one way that scenario is going to go anyway- badly - for her).
I'm not too clear on her motives for trying to delineate your group of friends, though if I were you, I'd encourage the friends who were stressed out by her to let her know themselves that they don't want to discuss the topic or choose a side.
If you do it, it's as if she's become a trouble maker your friends want to avoid and she'll see that as the group going to side with you over her (because in a way you're protecting them from her) - This sounds dramatic, but hey, she's a girl in school, drama's what it's all about. Even if your friends explain it's not like that she could still concoct/believe it.
Best thing to do is just be polite - in the extreme-- to each other and slowly get back to a normal friendly (strictly friends) relationship. You can't just zing back there, no matter what point of view she saw you from in the relationship to start with.
Also is she enters the "I miss being cuddled - maybe we should try again stage" -> avoid~
She really does just miss the act of being cuddled. ;p
Bleh school relationships. No one realizes while they're in them, that the majority aren't meant to last. (Though that was my problem in high school, my boyfriends were more like experiments than ...relationships...That was bad of me ...)
Ah well good luck (and yes she did act immature - but I repeat ->SCHOOL RELATIONSHIP) Maturity is so rare it's like a GOOD Canadian B movie.
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Posted: Sat Mar 31, 2012 3:53 pm
Racheal Shanks Tsuki the Lunar Wind In all honesty I don't know. I made an effort to kiss with her when I could and joked around doing the dorky things (she ate that up) that parents nab at their sons to do with their girlfriend like pull out the chairs and open doors. Because I am a dork. I stopped being all kissy like that a week before because she was having issues with her mom so I just tried to be there for support and not seem so pushy to kiss or anything when she was upset. Her reason was that I seemed more like a friend than a boyfriend. I think I'm acting maturely despite everyone saying I shouldn't try being her friend. I still get annoyed when I'm near her, since since I'm human and emotion driven, but I don't want her to change the way I act. I was only openly rude with her the next day I saw her but that's a given. And all I did was walk fast past her when she tried getting a friend to get me to talk to her. Are you sure she is sixteen? She sounds so immature it's ridiculous. You are sounding more and more mature. I mean, instead of going to you ant talking with you sensibly she tried to get a friend to talk to you? I stopped doing that when I was ten. What next, is she going to start passing notes in class? I say you dodged a bullet there, my friend, keep being awesome and the right girl will roll on by. Sixteen? Thats sophomore age, I'm 15 and she's 14 but I turned 15 a week or two ago. And thanks, I gave myself a week to to over her. And now a ironic as it sounds I pity her. Since she needed a party, a senior, to gossip about how immature I was, and such to feel better. I just needed someone to say ok.
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