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 Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2012 6:59 pm
It was a nice night, as far as all the others had been. Quiet, very still, very calm – a good night for thinking, if one had the mind to, or for walking, if one felt a little unsettled. The latter seemed to be Hushidhe’s usual mood, but at least he wasn’t quite as gloomy as before. There was a little more mass to the moon now, and it seemed to glow a little brighter, as though the goddess Herself had heard the emptiness of his heart and set out to fill it with milky light. It almost worked, and he almost smiled now, but there were still pieces of his world missing. He still ached over the loss of unity, and still walked alone, but a few gentle words from a small puppy had had more of an effect on his soul than even the moonlight seemed to give. It was odd, but true – and for that he felt he should apologize to Cerridwyn, and he desperately hoped She didn’t mind.
He was still in a bit of a funk, however, and so had found himself – once again – wandering the unknown forests when other, more sensible wolves were sound asleep. It seemed a sin to make any sounds on such a solemn night when not even the slightest breath of wind stirred amongst the meadows of frosted grass, and so he moved as though he walked on ice; not quite on his toes, never quite letting the whole of his weight touch the ground. He slunk about with his head low but his eyes to the moon, ears back a little with reverence and guilt. It hadn’t been Her fault that the pack had disintegrated, after all, and so tonight he let Her guide his steps as She would have him move. He didn’t quite know where he was going, but then, he never really did anymore.
Prophecies... a wolf of colours... and abandonment. Though if he wanted to be truly honest, he was never quite sure where he fit in with the pack anyways. Who was he supposed to be? Did he have a purpose? Had he really been a part of such an austere society? He sighed, and the very sound of his breath reaching out into the misty night was like fangs on a bone, or nails to slate. He grimaced, shook himself all over, and pondered the thought a bit longer. Had he even been seen as a true pack member?
He wasn't so sure. How many had he met? It seemed that, only now with the pack in pieces, was he even beginning to understand the nature of those he supposed were like his family delegated by the Moon. She had placed them together, but had She meant for him to be there at all? It seemed he had just been an add-on, and that weighed on his soul a little more than most of his other worries. He could sing, but only knew so many of the Hymns. He would pray, always, but didn't know the proper words to entice the Goddess's approval. And he certainly couldn't fight for the cause, he was much too weak...
At least in the forest, he could marinate in his weakness alone. He could only cling to the puppy for so long - but he would probably leave sooner or later. He had a real family to care for him.
Hush was alone.
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Posted: Mon Jan 16, 2012 7:11 pm
Plop!
The dew had collected too many drops at the very tip of one leaf, and ducking down Ayishik caught the silvery jewel on the very tip of her nose. “Ohh…” she sighed, lifting it to the moon and reveling in the way it shone. Like a far-off sea, right on the tip of her nose, a living thing that wobbled and shivered, though she did her best to stay completely still.
It was destined to fall, though. She knew it would, and didn’t really mind the inevitable fate of the dewdrop. It didn’t know any better. But she had seen what she needed to see, and letting her toes wiggle and move as the drop did, she found herself in a dance through the silence that took her over roots, through bushes, and toward the only sound she could hear. A river in the distance was calling out to the moonbeam wolf, saying, do come a little closer! “I’m coming! I am, little river!” Ayishik replied, her voice warbling in a sing-song sort of way. ”Don’t start the dance without me – you have, haven’t you? Oh darn, and I thought you would save the first dance for me!
Still, she leaped and trotted her way along a sort of secret path, the kind made up by the wandering mind that, once taken, would disappear into the leaves and never be seen again. She let her sides rub against frost and dew, not minding the wet in the least, and when she at last met the river’s edge she threw herself into an exaggerated bow – front legs thrown forward, tail wagging high in the air. “Hullo!” she cried, hindquarters swinging back and forth, big grin reflected in the icy sheen coating the shallower water. ”Hullo there!
Then, her eyes caught the reflection of the moon, far out on the waters. She tilted her head this way and that, giving the air a full-nostriled sniff, and deciding to get a better view, she flopped onto her side. She wiggled in the stiff grasses until on her back, tongue flapping about the side of her mouth, until finally her round eyes focused on what appeared to be most of a moon. Strange, how bits of it were sometimes missing, but all was fine; usually, the moon would find all its bits once a month, and be full and fat and round. “Dearest Mother, you’re looking much better this night. How was your trip through the sparkling black?”
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Posted: Wed Jan 18, 2012 5:14 pm
Maybe he didn’t mind being alone. Maybe he preferred it. If he really wanted to reflect on his life, he could say withpositivity that perhaps a solid half of it had been spent in the silence of his own company, trying to find where he belonged and what he was supposed to do.
At least in those hours he had considered his life purposeful, and with some form of worth.
But maybe he just wasn’t meant to be a social sort of wolf - yes, maybe that was it. He could hardly speak, anyways, and at lwast when given an audience of himself he coulddo his best singing. Not - not that he was keen on singing, in this exact moment, with so much riding on his back and strangling his vocal cords. Stress ahd tightened his throat and made him incapable of all but the softest of hums, usually tuneless, never really worth remembering. Such a shame, that he couldn’t compuse even the simplest of melodies for the Moon above, and all her grace in allowing him to live without company.
No, She was his company. And so long as she remained above him, then he wasn’t really all that alone.
Still, when the gentle tendrils of nighttime wind took quiet, melodic intonations of another voice, his ears perked. Someone was nearby, and they were speaking - but to whom?
He lowered himself to the earth and pressed onward with an urgency beating in his chest. Who were they? Could they be part of hs splintered pack? He could at least try to catch on to their conversation, if only to glean a little bit of the world beyond Cerridwen’s sanctity.
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