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 Posted: Mon Dec 05, 2011 8:28 pm
Can I split you down the middle?
Crack your sternum in one clean break,
And peal your ribs to the side like butterfly wings?
Just to see if your heart beats for me?
Will you use those wings to fly,
My little bug- into my arms?
We can spend the night together listening
To our hearts make music like crickets,
A steady, even chirp that has no end.
We can dance on the empty shells
Of the ones we left behind,
The crunch of their dried husks
Lending the percussion to our love song.
They are the ones that litter the path that connects
You and I.
With fire in our eyes we will laugh,
And rejoice,
Because their pain is what gives us power,
Their pain fuels Our love.
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 12:38 am
woah. Romantic, but very very twisted. I like it. It adds such a wonderfully morbid layer to the traditional love poem, bringing it to another level. Oh course, I'm a sucker for dark and grim writings, so I'm probably bias.
Loved the butterfly wings analogy and how you kept it going in the next few lines, even keeping up with the bug imagery with "music like crickets". Gave it good connectivity and flow.
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-l- Psychotic Saint -l- Captain
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Posted: Tue Dec 06, 2011 8:49 am
-l- Psychotic Saint -l- woah. Romantic, but very very twisted. I like it. It adds such a wonderfully morbid layer to the traditional love poem, bringing it to another level. Oh course, I'm a sucker for dark and grim writings, so I'm probably bias. Loved the butterfly wings analogy and how you kept it going in the next few lines, even keeping up with the bug imagery with "music like crickets". Gave it good connectivity and flow. Thank you. I wrote it for my fiance, who totally didn't get it. He thinks I am creepy and want to kill him. <3
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