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 Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 3:58 pm
[ this was done over emails between vars and prajna~ ]
It had been a long time. Hours. Days. Weeks. It wasn't his silence that marked the passage of time, but the absence of his guardian. Guardian! Who gave the girl license to watch over him in the first place? Kinsey was a kind soul; she worked hard, she was an earnest young woman, still bright-eyed and bushy-tailed every day she loaded Ford into the truck and drove down to the station. She was in love with her job, her dog, she even adored her ornery Raevan as he glowered and sulked in his cave. The police woman had her whole life ahead of her, and she savored every last moment (much to Varun's disgust). If she worried about the Leviathan's behavior, she masked it well, bringing him things to eat and read as she tried to ride out his lasting grudge. Except for the past few...however long it had been. Varun keened. He was hungry.
Behind him, his wings flayed out, wilted and black. They were no longer webbed and strong, but there were pinholes in the delicate tissue, fraying edges along the bones. Even the fins on the sides of the creature's head had changed with his wings, a sickly black stark against his deep red hair. The ponytail had been hacked off in a fit of rage, tangles catching in Varun's brush and pulling roots from his pale scalp. There had been no human to patiently pick tangles from his luscious locks of hair (and there had been no human to make sure he cut a straight edge, either). Looking more and more like a creature that had risen straight from the murky depths, the Leviathan had emerged from his chamber. There was no one in the house. Judging by the even layer of dust settled around the small rooms and the complete lack of anything remotely edible, his woman had not been here. Not been here to talk to him (so he could pretend not to listen), not been here to try and lure him out (so he had a reason to stay huddled inside), not been here to bring him something seasonal to feed on (so he had a source of food at all). He felt so weak.
With a wrinkle of his nose, the Leviathan huff and hovered to the door. He was not supposed to go out. It had been so long - or had it been? How long since he had been struck down by the hand of God?
K-Kinsey.... he croaked, his voice dry and rough. The Raevan gave himself a shake and slithered down the apartment stairs. Where? Where did he look? Black wings fluttered out to the side, beating haphazardly as he pushed through the thinning evening crowd. Those who did not skitter away immediately were treated to a snarl and a half-hearted click of teeth, green eyes staring straight ahead as the Frei guided himself to a place he had not been in ages. A rap at the door. Prajna! Prajnaaaa! PRAAAAAJNAAAAA!
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:00 pm
Turquoise colored eyes flickered lazily across the television screen, half amused and half indifferent to the Siamese cat playing across the screen. Prajna knew that cartoons were supposed to be exaggerated and all, but talking cats? Did cats even have mustaches like this one's father did? Or rather, did cats wear makeup like that mother cat did? Psh, Prajna knew that they, in fact, did not. As another kitten came on screen and mewed "Sagwa! Sagwa! Come help us!" Prajna looked out the window and wondered if it should go exploring today. Namini was still away at school, her college classes taking up more of her time now than they did back in high school, and David, Prajna assumed, was working oh so hard at some job of his. The Star let out a small 'hmph' of disinterest before turning the television off. It stretched its arms over the back of the couch and let out a loud, obnoxious yawn before pushing itself up and towards Namini's room. Wandering into her closet, half of which was now dedicated to Prajna's own growing wardrobe, Prajna began to sort through its assortment of shirts, wondering what would be nice to wear in this cooler weather, when suddenly there was a rude rapping at the door. Prajna's ears perked up when it heard a male voice growl its name.
Prajna! Prajnaaaa! PRAAAAAJNAAAAA!
Prajna narrowed its eyes in concentration as it mouthed, unashamed, "Who is that?" The name seemed to dance on the tip of Prajna's tongue, making the Star do a silly kind of snake like motion with its mouth and tongue. Finally, the redheaded Frei's eyes widened and it dropped the clothes it was holding and flew quickly over to the door, only stopping by the mirror in the small pathway to the entrance to check its hair. Still unruly. But unruly... in that sexy style Prajna saw all those pretty women looking like on the television. With a smirk, the Frei then answered the door, its voice coming out like a soft brush with silk, "Varun? Is you?"
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:16 pm
This was taking entirely too long. Where was his friend? (Did he even have those? Was Prajna actually his friend? The Leviathan never did understand the qualifications for one of those, just that Kinsey had a boy one that he most certainly did not approve of.) With his ribbon spiraling dangerously, the Frei pounded on the door again, his eyes narrow as he hollered. He had no quarrel with ripping the flimsy piece of wood off its hinges if he must. So busy fuming, hearing the blood boiling in his veins, the sea monster failed to hear the Star's first call as it wandered through its house. "PRAJNA!" He wanted to talk to the other Raevan now. Now! Cleaning delicate, pale digits into ugly fists, he slammed into the door seconds before it opened. Teal eyes snapped open as did fin-like wings, quivering and standing at attention as he eyed the other redhead with some degree of interest, some hesitation lurking in those untrusting eyes. There was so little for him to believe in these days.
"Of course. I am Varun." With a small sneer, the Leviathan placed his hand on his chest, fingers spread. Despite his current state of disarray, the Raevan held his head high and gave his tattered wings a small twitch. "Don't be stupid, Prajna. Not like you." He remembered the other Frei as witty, pretty, and just as quick to temper as he was. After a moment, the stiff drained from all the creatures fins and he huffed softly, Varun running a hand through his butchered hair. Here he was standing on a doorstep. This was like one of Kinsey's terrible movies, but what was he supposed to say. What was his line this time? "I...was looking for you?"
When Prajna opened the door, it had prepared itself to see the glorious image of its crimson friend, his stunning hair floating delicately in the wing and his wings beautifully vibrant; instead, the androgynous Star revealed to itself a shabby looking Leviathan, his hair chopped off and layered like a hot mess around his face, his fins blackened and holed. In short, Varun looked like misery itself. Prajna felt a sudden pang of sympathy when it finally took everything in, its smaller hands tightening into weak fists by its side, as it realized that Varun... looked like Prajna when it had experienced the virus. "I...was looking for you?"
Even the way he was speaking seemed different, and yet Prajna was being accused of "not being like itself." The smaller redhead couldn't help but give a bittersweet smirk before peeking its head out into the hallway and, after looking down both ends of the complex pathway, and then doing a double take, grabbed Varun by the collar of his shirt and pulled him inside the Nao residence. Who was Prajna to turn aside a long time... "friend" when he clearly needed the Star? Prajna liked being needed, wanted. And Varun was showering the Star in surprising attention, after disappearing for so long and without any effort or influence on the Star's part. Prajna was almost beaming but it knew to focus on Varun for now... That was the only way Varun was going to continue to stay by Prajna's side and keep the Star company. Much more entertaining than television.
Once the door had closed with a quiet -click!- behind the two of them, the shorter Frei turned Varun around to better inspect him. Prajna pouted childishly as it ran an affectionate hand through Varun's disheveled locks, its fingers trickling from the Leviathan's scalp, down his neck, to find themselves grazing the edges of his scaly wings. They were so black. Prajna took its other hand and folded a small group of its blackened bangs and compared the colors. Yes. Black. Pitch black. Prajna turned Varun around, and with a mixture of genuine concern and light irritation on its genderless features, Prajna hissed maternally, "What happened to Prajna's favorite Varun? Is black! BLACK Varun! And hair? Wahhh, hair of Varun."
Prajna made a sourer face as it ruffled the Leviathan's hair and then pulled him into a hug, still frowning.
"Says looking for Prajna who misses Varun but comes looking like dead man walking. What is wrong with Varun?" came the muffled whine.
Slightly relieved to be let into Prajna's abode (it had been a great length of time since he had seen the Star, since he had seen anyone at all), the Leviathan slithered inside after the more delicate Raeven. He even allowed himself to be pulled - he had been doing so much fighting lately, a war couldn't last if there was a battle raging on every front. With Kinsey gone, he'd been left to fend for himself. Oh, yes. That was why he was here, wasn't it? Kinsey and the dog never came back. They said they would, but the did not. Not that the seasonal Frei was terribly surprised; after the incident in the supermarket with the taser, he hadn't trusted a single word that had fallen from those chapped lips. Still, he'd gotten hungry, and his hair had become matted. He needed his woman to come home from work now, even if she didn't want to. That was why he had come - he needed... He needed... Hm. This was going to be harder than the Leviathan had ever realized.
The fingers grazing through his spiky hair caught him off guard, Varun shying away like a stallion who'd been rapped in the face one too many times. About to warn the intruder off with a hiss and a swat, he noticed the concerned look spreading across Prajna's face. That was new. That was not an expression he usually inspired on his friend - it was usually reserved for his woman. That filthy, no good human, traitor, traitor! She left him! Wings snapped out to the side and quivered, bits and pieces hanging limply as he stiffened and puffed his chest. He did not need her, but he would find her and drag her back to his domain. Leaving him like this. Like this! With his sad, sore wings and his short, ugly hair. (But so help anyone who actually said he looked terrible.)
"Favorite Varun?" Okay, that sounded pretty good. In fact, that sounded pretty amazing. Wings drooped back to Varun's back and his fins pricked forward, the beast intrigued. "Kinsey. Kinsey happened. Awful Kinsey, terrible Kinsey, struck Varun down like sh-" Cut off by a sudden hug, the Leviathan flailed wildly, his wings trapped against his spine as he was embraced. What was this!? "Praj...Prajna. Whatfor?" His voice was still rough, gravelly. It had strained from lack of use, and while his voice had always been something deep, dark, classic maybe-hero-maybe-villian waiting in the shadows, it had never sounded so hoarse or ugly. Ugly. Kinsey had made him into this hideous beast and then she had left, left him to wallow and deal with the aftermath all on his own.
Kinsey, he insisted again. Kinsey is wrong. Kinsey is gone. Just leaves, like she can, like she owns Varun and rights it gives her. Ha! Varun belongs to no one, I belong to no one. The mighty beast's chest reverberated with a growl, his wings fluttering beneath the Star's arms. So I come here. Because my hair is like this and my wings are like this and I am so... Ugly. Prajna is never ugly. Surely, there can be fix? No need for Kinsey. Varun finally gave up trying to wrestle his way out of the hug, instead resting his chin against Prajna's shoulder. It felt so good to speak again, oh, he'd so missed his words. He missed his words like he missed the ocean, like he'd missed his friend. "Fix me."
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:20 pm
Prajna's lips further curled into scolding frown as Varun initially hissed and flailed against the Star's surprise embrace, but then the Star let out a forgiving sigh as it felt the taller Frei relax and eventually settle his face against its shoulder. Distracted by the Leviathan's sudden warmth and familiar physique, things the Star found more comforting than any words could describe, Prajna also noted at how Varun's final words, his soft plea in the Star's ear, sent a rare chill up its partially developed spine, a sensation that Prajna had some difficulty registering but when the realization hit, the fiery Frei's cheeks were bright red. Varun was openly expressing the need for Prajna's company, its guidance, IT. There was only one other person who seemed to have expressed such feelings but in a more subtle way. For a moment, Vyn's startling golden eyes flashed across Prajna's mind, seducing the Frei as they always did, but then Prajna pulled itself away from Varun, their faces only a few inches apart now, and found itself swept away by the sad waters of Varun's eyes. His gaze was so turbulent with all these emotions Kinsey had left him with, had abandoned him with, and yet so clear. Prajna's lips quivered for a moment, the urge to further explore the dangerous waters growing, but it restricted itself; Varun had come for Prajna's help, its comfort. If Prajna handled the situation selfishly or without tact, it feared it might actually lose ... someone... worth keeping? Someone Prajna wanted to keep.
The androgynous redhead shuttered its way through its embarrassment and perhaps less than innocent thoughts and looked up at Varun with determination and understanding in its clear, cerulean eyes, "Prajna will help Varun. No need for Kensay now! We will look later for her. Maybe. Someday. Now we must think of only Varun. Varun is never ugly, not even nowso. Just tired looking. Come, come! Prajna will.. think of something."
And with that, the smaller Frei took Varun's hand and led him into the living room, trying its best to hide the continuing pinkness dancing across its pale cheeks. Gesturing to the couch, the mischievous gears in Prajna's head began to turn and work their playful cunning into something that would be more appropriate, looking for a solution that fit the conditions of the dilemma. This was no time to jest. Varun was genuinely seeking Prajna's help! The Star began to think of what it may be able to do to help improve Varun's current appearance.
"Sit. Prajna will get something!" came the sudden exclamation, as the Star bolted from Varun's side and went rummaging in Namini's room, making loud, suspicious noises as it explored her drawers until it came back with a pair of scissors... though one would be worried at its return, as Prajna seemed to be holding them in a menacing manner. "We can fix hair so not so.. ..."
Prajna tried to avoid the word "ugly" since they were friends and seemed to have trouble finding a synonym.
"Wild?"
At least someone understood. After all this time (however long it had been, the Leviathan had not stopped to check a calendar, though even if he had it was rather unlikely he'd understand how to read one), his Kinsey still didn't understand what a grievous crime she had commit. Oh, there were apologies. They were in words and in thoughts and in stuff. So much stuff. What did a Raevan need with objects? The paint was nice, easier to right with his fingers than to scratch things out with a pencil or marker. The comic books were interested, the pictures easier to decipher than tiny print on fragile pages. But it meant nothing, it was just junk that the woman had found. It looked nice, caught her eye, but what did it mean? She did not even know he liked Batman much better than Spiderman, and found the Green Lantern to be a fool. If there was a super hero he liked the best, it was The Flash, even if he never showed up in most comics. She did not understand he liked acrylics better than water paints, but he liked simple children's paint the best. It came in pots, so easy to dunk his entire hand in and smear it across the canvas wall.
Grunting when Prajna pulled away - he had just gotten comfortable, damnit! - he eyed the smaller Raevan as it tried to comfort him. He was not sure he believed all these nice words - he had looked in the mirror. (Perhaps if he had looked when he took the knife to his hair, he later reasoned, it might not had come out as such a monstrosity.) "Think of something, I hope so. Have you seen my hair?" Ugh. Times like these, the Leviathan wished for a hood or a hat, things he so previously hated. He had no choice but to trust the Star, now. It was the lively redhead or a total stranger, and even if his friend looked mildly manic with a pair of sheers in his hand, it was better than offering what was left of his pride to a total moron and hope for the best. The best never happened. You just had to make due with the absolute worse.
With a brave swallow, the pale Raevan sat up a bit straighter and tipped his chin up. He was not afraid. "Careful of the fins," he warned Prajna, the tattered black flicking in mild interest. "Do it. Just....do it. Better to get it over with, right?"
Prajna was taken aback, no, perhaps jealous of Varun's bravery. Did he understand what he was letting Prajna cut. his. HAIR? Cut off more than what the Leviathan had already had himself?! Prajna ran its slender fingers through its own soft but untamed hair and tried to image letting someone like Rivener cut it. The Frei shuttered before glancing Varun over once more. He truly was a mess, wasn't he? But even when faced with such courage, Prajna, for once, was feeling less than confident. Was there really no way Prajna could make things worse? It did not want to disappoint. No. It could not disappoint. It was Prajna! And yet... this was a field in which the Star had such little experience in. The most it had done with its own hair was braid it, maybe put it up in an oriental bun, but that was the extent of the redhead's knowledge. It swallowed and then floated closer to its determined companion.
Prajna reached out again and, with the hand free from the scissor's metallic grip, stroked the uneven ends of Varun's hair. Its familiar silkiness made the Star even more nervous about trimming it. But it really couldn't tell him no, right?!
Finally, Prajna couldn't hold back. Placing the scissors on the back of the couch for a moment, the Star gave Varun another hug from behind, its arms entangling themselves carefully but tightly around his neck. This was such a mess. Varun was an emotional sea trying to figure out which way to push its tides and Prajna felt like a spiraling star, destined to burn pitifully, thanks to the unrelenting grip of gravity... or Fate. Prajna refused, or rather, choked on its tears, unwilling to let them roll down its pale cheeks as it whispered tenderly into Varun's ear (fin?), "I am sorry Varun is suffering so. I hope... this will actually help you."
The Inverted Flame felt weird for using pronouns for once, but with the seriousness of the situation... for some reason, Prajna thought that this just felt right. Prajna thought it would be okay to talk... like this to someone so precious and confused like Prajna too.
Prajna planted an innocent kiss on the Leviathan's cheek before "standing" back up and retying its own hair back, preparing itself for the first cut. The first real dive into trust and whatever this was... with Varun. Because it was glaringly obvious to the intellectual Star that this was going to be more, to both of them, than just a simple trim.
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:24 pm
Every time Prajna so much as shifted, the younger Frei would brace himself again, and again. Every time the Star moved, Varun braced himself for the worst. (But honestly, how much could it really be? He looked like he lost a fight with one of those machines humans used to trim their grass...except even a mowed lawn looked better than the Leviathan's hair did now. At least lawns were even!) Suddenly, the sea monster found himself in a second surprise embrace - again, the beast startled, but this time, he settled into the embrace with no resistance. If this was what the redhead needed to do to find its courage, Varun would allow it. He did not permit Kinsey to touch him but...but Prajna was not Varun. The Frei listened, and though it had slapped him once, Prajna had never really hurt him. Not like Kinsey. Kinsey, Kinsey, Kinsey, that witch. Traitor!
Traitor!
"Yes. I think it will." Flicking his fin to one side, emerald green eyes shifted to one side and Varun gave a brief nod of his head. Was he suffering? The Leviathan had never put any great thought to that, just his anger, his betrayal. He nursed his wounded pride and injured confidence, and the serpent waited. It simmered and boiled, but never did he think, did he really stop to think, that he might be suffering. He was not suffering, was he? Was he? Is that was Kinsey had left him to do, alone and hungry, dirty and tired. Was this suffering? Was this pain? Anger roiled through his veins again, and the beast hissed at the very idea, brows dipping down into a furrow the harder he thought on the matter. He would bring her to justice, to justice, that witch!
"I want to see. P-Please." The word tasted so foreign to him, felt heavy on his tongue. But perhaps a new look would be good for him. That would show the woman, wouldn't it? He could be different, be better without him.
Unbeknownst to Prajna, Varun was experiencing a whirlpool of emotions, finding himself either breaking through the surface of self reflection or back underneath, drowning in anger and hurt and the deep sea that was betrayal. Had Prajna more interest in humans and why they did the things they did, like make "reality" shows that were not very realistic or ponder the existence of magical beasts (This was Gaia! The land of the imaginable, the impossible. People could wear wings on their head as accessories for goodness sake!), it may have perhaps gotten the Leviathan to open up a little, through gentle, careful questions of genuine earnestness and concern. Instead, the Star focused on salvaging what could be salvaged of Varun's ruby colored tresses; it seemed, after the initial -snip!-, that Prajna was quickly able to regain its confidence, soon trimming quite steadily, mentally recalling any and every cooking and beauty show it had watched since its birth and its introduction to the magical world of the television. It was simply difficult to stay relieved because it appeared as if every strand on Varun's scalp had somehow been wronged. Prajna had unconsciously started to bite its lip in anxiousness as it evened out the last few strands, uncomfortable by Varun's sudden silence. Perhaps the Leviathan's own anxiety was building. Maybe he was starting to regret letting the smaller Frei attempt this miracle? Prajna could only hope Varun was merely praying for the best and putting all of his faith into Prajna's inexperienced but crafty hands. With a final -snip! snip!- and a quick run through the scalp by meticulous fingers, Prajna had finished just as Varun seemed to confess, "I want to see. P-Please."
Prajna had already floated back a bit to give Varun some much needed air and its blush, by now, had long dispersed but at the usually bold Leviathan's tender "please", the Star found its cheeks ablaze once more.
"Let Prajna get mirror," came the hurried, embarrassed reply, Prajna already having slipped back into its casual lack of pronouns. The Frei ruffled its charcoal colored wings and then floated off quickly to the bathroom, returning within moments, a large mirror in its hands. It was still blushing. It was now or never.
Prajna seemed to wince and force a smile as it handed the mirror over to Varun, slowly floating onto the couch beside him. In nervousness, Prajna saw the tuffs of hair on the back of the couch and brushed them off onto the floor, "cleaning up" one might say, smiling even wider now, even more hysterically. All the Star wished for was its companion's praise and acceptance. That was it. Was that too much to ask?
"What does Varun think?" Prajna choked, trying to sound like its usual confident self.
With twitching fingers, the Leviathan reached up, raking his hands through his short hair. The feeling was so strange, like running his hands over several new paintbrushes. No longer the long strands he couldn't reach the bottom, but something thick and choppy. He wasn't sure what to think about it, couldn't figure out how this would look. Fortunately, Prajna had darted off to return with a large mirror, offering the glass up. Snatching it away, the redhead wasted no time, pulling it close to his face and wrinkling his nose as he stared at his reflection. His natural reaction was to preen, but what was there to be proud of? Black, ugly fins. Short hair. Chewing on his lowering lip, Varun ran thin fingers through his hair again. It...It didn't look bad. His brows were furrowed and he shifted his head, checking out the side, even trying to find some way to eye the back. It was so...short. He couldn't tie any of it up, in fact, the Leviathan could barely grab a handful. Setting the mirror back down, he whirled on Prajna.
"It is different," he finally murmured, tipping his head to one side. Different, bad? Different, good? He didn't know. He couldn't...he didn't... It would take time. Eying Prajna, he rose, and gave his head a little shake. "It feels light. I go to hair-touch, and cannot find it." Truth be told, it was very strange. But he could not tell that to his friend. Prajna was...Prajna. He had learned what happened when one called the Star ugly. "It is good. Prajna is good with the hair cutting. It is good that Varun...that I came here. Yes. But... " He trailed off, expression quickly turning sour as he motioned towards the blackened fins. These... Cannot cut them off."
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:29 pm
Prajna watched as Varun snaked his fingers through his freshly styled locks, pulling a bit here and there, smoothing his entire palm over some areas, and it felt its heart racing even faster. Prajna's worthiness as a friend was being judged and it could barely contain its overwhelming feelings of anxiety, embarrassment, self pity. When would the seconds stop feeling like years? Finally, Varun parted his lips and murmured his judgment, "It is different."
Prajna choked and almost burst out in self defense, its emotions slowly forming into rage, but then the Leviathan continued thoughtfully, "It feels light. I go to hair-touch, and cannot find it. It is good. Prajna is good..."
The Star was staring blankly at its companion who continued to chat away inquisitively, motioning to his fins now and then and their discoloration, yet Prajna heard almost none of it.
Prajna was good.
The words resonated throughout the Star's being, as partially developed as it was and goosebumps crawled their way up to the cool surface of Prajna's skin. The words were more than electrifying. They were... they were... compelling. Appreciated? Reciprocated? Prajna didn't know the word for these feelings. It broke out into a soft smile and, blinked a few times, its clear eyes glistening like a beautiful lake on a summer day, reflecting the brilliance of the sun and the blue blue skies, and was going to say a whole bunch of wonderful things to Varun, things that were just going to slide off the sly Frei's tongue, when it realized Varun was still playing with his hair, still distracted by his colorless fins...
Prajna tried to calm itself and understand. The androgynous soul really did want to understand and be there for its friend but how? The obvious approach would be to just ask Varun straight up what was on his mind, but it seemed so tactless, so vulgar in a sense, and disrespectful of his privacy. Yet, Prajna was dying to understand, to know just what Varun was holding back from it. And the fins... The Star raised its trouble gaze back to the tattered scales and webbed skin of Varun's head pieces and wings. What could be done about those? Like the Leviathan had stated, one could not just go and cut them off. Recoloring them seemed impossible too; Prajna imagined it would be like trying to recolor a Frei's horns or feathers. Tacky and uncomfortable. So what could the Star do to comfort its friend?
Prajna stole a glance at the scissors now lying on the table. Varun seemed distracted still, by the hair, his scales, the feelings he wasn't letting out. Prajna's innate nature of competitiveness mixed with its impossible need to sympathize led the Star to the most impulsive and perhaps most selfish act it had ever committed.
In Varun's moment of self reflection, Prajna quickly reached over, grabbed the scissors and, closing its eyes out of fear of what was to happen next, reached its hands above its head and listened to the odd, muffled -snip!snip!- ...before pulling its hands away, to see the glaring scissors in one hand and its freshly severed ponytail in the other. As the already wild and fiery locks started to fall into a new found "place" around the Star's delicate face, Prajna held back a soft gasp before presenting the two pieces of evidence to Varun, a solemn look on its face. Its voice shaking, finally, Prajna broke the tension surrounding them and said, "Now we are the same. I have blackness in my hair too... so tell me what exactly happened so I can better help you, Varun."
Prajna tried to smile, in hopes of relieving whatever drama could be left in the air from its sudden trim, using the scissors to gently tap against its own scalp, pointing at the black bangs it possessed, hoping it would be enough of a similarity to Varun's charcoal scales to ease perhaps some of the emotional turmoil in the Leviathan.
Ohhh what a surprise Namini was going to come home to...
Oblivious to the chain of events he just set off inside of his companion's head, Varun waited for further advice impatiently. He did not have all day (as a matter of fact, he probably had all week, given Kinsey's general absence and his complete lack of curfew), and the fact that the Star might be as reflective as he was today failed to cross the Frei's mind. His own tragedy was all he could think of, his hideous state of disarray, the awful way Kinsey had left it. It wasn't even like he missed the woman all that much, he had stopped missing the police officer the moment she stuck a knife in his back (and sent what felt like one million volts surging through his partial body). She could have walked out of his life then, and the Leviathan would have been better for it. The fact that the young woman kept trying, bringing him things he did not want, saying things he could not hear, it only made everything that much worse. Every gift was a log on the fire, and the creature was truly burning inside out. And then, just like that, she was gone, as though she'd never been there to begin with. A truly undependable animal, his human, but she was still his, and he would find her. He would punish her for what she had done.
The sound of a snip broke through the murderous thoughts. Varun startled - for a moment, he worried that his redhaired friend might actually be continuing work. His hair was already short enough! But imagine his surprise when teal eyes found Prajna, scissors in hand, its ponytail in the other. Eyes widening, the Leviathan rose and floated close to the Star, his ribbon twirling in great interest as he watched the other's delicate features. "Whatfor?" he demanded, moments before the much more fashionable Raevan offered its explanation. The same? Were they the same? Varun glanced back at the mirror, fanning his blackened fins and stretching his sore wings as he considered the possibility. No, they were not. Not at all. Prajna may have up some of its hair, but the older Frei was still beautiful, pristine. Put together and charming. "No." He shook his head, reaching out to run a hand through Prajna's hair. "Prajna...we are not the same. I am ugly. This is all...sharp and wrong. But Prajna...but you are still you. And you are always good, and right, and beautiful."
Varun could not explain the emotion he had then, something coiling in his chest and stealing his breath away. It wasn't fair, really, that his friend could be so...so...Prajna, and Varun was sliding through his fingers like water or sand. The harder he tried to catch it, the quicker it would filter away, spreading across the floor and vanishing into oblivion. Slim fingers curled in the Star's soft hair before the Leviathan pulled away, still frowning as he tried to put words to his thoughts, to even begin explaining the storm brewing where a heart should be. "Kinsey, I tell you. She strikes me down, like she owns me, with the lightning, even though I... She was my human, and this she does to me. This! I do not need her, I punish her with silence, and still she tried until she just...goes. Away. Does not tell me she leaves, maybe for that boyfriend she has, or dog, ugh. But why tell Varun, eh? No. Varun will not...I will not. I am not that." With a hefty sigh, the Leviathan threw his hands to the side. All of that explaining, and he was not an inch closer to understand. "I need... I do not.... Uuuugh. I need to fix wings and black fins. Blackness. I feel so black."
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:34 pm
Prajna believed it was proud of its reflective action, so full of pride at being able to sympathize and help its friend open up. But then Varun hissed, demanding. confused, "Whatfor?" and the shame pulled Prajna down, as if it was wearing cement shoes and was then violently thrown into the middle of the bottomless sea. One of Varun's rough, tanned hands glided through Prajna's choppy locks as he continued to try and explain himself. But what was he saying?Prajna felt exhausted and drowning, unable to take all of this in, like oxygen that's right there, but still so out of reach. How were they not the same? They looked the same now... What was he saying? Always...Good? Right? Beautiful?
Was Varun being honest and true? But then again, he always was honest with the Star...Prajna parted its lips and inhaled sharply when it felt the fingers running through its hair twirl slightly, admiring the texture, before pulling themselves away and returning themselves to Varun's abandoned side, and the older Raevan felt slightly slighted. All these compliments and gestures and explanations was like getting all that oxygen, too much oxygen, when you're first pulled out of the water's strong grasp. Prajna recomposed itself and tried to refocus all its attention on Varun, as hard as that was. Prajna wanted no more than to...be selfish. and shower Varun in the same compliments and gestures he was presenting to the Star. At the thought of restraining itself, the Star did not realize its temper was slowly building. And this Kinsey talk? That was not helping.
But Prajna tried to bite its tongue! What could it say, calm and composed? Nothing. Its lips wouldn't let nice words about someone who just ABANDONED its friend pass. But were angry words appropriate?
Then Varun said, "I need... I do not.... Uuuugh. I need to fix wings and black fins. Blackness. I feel so black."
And Prajna lost its control.
Reaching over, the Star suddenly pulled Varun close, one hand rough on the back of the Leviathan's neck and the other, gentle but firm against the other's sunkissed cheek. Prajna's lips made, at first, seemingly sweet contact with Varun's, but Prajna parted with a quick bite of Varun's lower lip, frowning as it separated itself from him. Prajna licked its lips before growling, its temper now exposed and burning brightly, "Varun. Shut up. I would not dare like someone who is ugly. So Varun is not ugly. Not close to ugly like even. Prajna is never good, never right, just Prajna. So just be Varun. Find the stupid human. Show her Varun's strength and be strong like Prajna likes. Take what Varun likes, keep what Varun likes. Be like the lightning she used; find her, strike her down, tell her the truth and power of your feelings. She will be shocked, heh."
Prajna smirked for a moment and then confessed, leaning its face against a propped up hand on the back of the couch, its expression possessing a twinge of sadness, "I have missed Varun and you come back to me so sad like. Do not let some stupid human, like Namini, or David, or your lady Kinsey, change the Varun I like so much."
Prajna stole Varun's air away, in one great rush it left him empty and gasping, his eyes wide with wonder as the older Raevan plunged in and robbed the Leviathan of his inner turmoil. Out his fins spread, bones quivering and rattling as the male floated frozen in place. He was not angry, the rage and indignance put out like flame underneath as waterfall. Only steam sizzled from his burning passion, fingers flexing by his sides before the seasonal Frei finally found the consciousness to lean forward into the intimate embrace. As soon as the Star was there, it was gone, with only growls and harsh words parading ad advice. Quirking his brows, the creature refused to backpedal, refused the idea of being cowed by such a delicate thing. (Fragile, and still so enormously strong, like Atlas who held the world, or Hercules who defeated the Titans. A great thing in a small, well-wrapped package.)
"Be like the lightning she used..." he murmured, rippling the fins on the side of his head at the very idea. To be like lightning was to be powerful and strong, loud and defiant. He would strike without warning and leave no room for argument, leave only smoldering piles of ash in the wake of those that crossed him. He was Varun, he was the Leviathan, the sea monster. "Yesssss", he hissed, an old gleam reaching those sea green eyes. The beast slithered forward, grappling for his friend and latching on to a wrist, to pull the Star close and never release back to the great wide world. "Yes. Prajna is right. Varun will be like the lightning. I will be the lightning and strike her down. No one will change Varun, especially not a stupid human. I am Varun." I am great, and I am wonderful, he did not say. I am powerful, and I am tired of being cast down. I am tired of not being able to remember these things, I am tired of not being able to answer the call of the sea. With a low rumble, the beast leaned down, pressing his lips to Prajna's lips, returning the Frei's expression of...affection? Empathy? Care?
The kiss was nothing gentle, but nothing less could be expected from the great serpent. He was all teeth and tongue, all dominance and display. He was all possession and protection. This was his, this friendship, this relationship. This. Prajna. Even if Kinsey had cast him to the wind and disappeared herself, the older Raevan was still here when Varun searched it out. "I am Varun, and you are Prajna. This is good. You are mine. I like you, and I will keep you. " The seasonal Frei pulled back, though he did not realize the smaller redhead's small wrist. A small smile threatened to curl his lips upwards. "I will not stay away so long next time." If he had come sooner, perhaps his hair could have been saved and his wings wouldn't be so tattered and ruined. But surely, someone would fix them.
"I am new Varun, now. No more of the old, the defeated, the owned. Varun belongs to no one, I am my own. Lightning Varun." Varun ran a hand through his short hair, slowly adjusting to the feeling. "Strike down those who cross me and steal what is mine. I will be the strength you like so much."
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Posted: Sat Oct 15, 2011 4:37 pm
All Prajna needed to hear was Varun's hiss of approval, his enthusiastic "Yesssss." and the Star knew it had done its job, their eternal friendship had been safely and permanently secured. This smugness did not last long fortunately, as Prajna watched Varun scoot over and then firmly grasp the Star's slender wrist. What was he doing? An avid fan of skinship and close proximity, something about the way Varun stared so piercingly ...hungrily almost into the Star's own blue eyes made Prajna squirm. The hand that had been propping the Star's pale cheek fell and Prajna soon found itself staring suspiciously at Varun's larger hand, tight, around its wrist. Varun seemed to agree with everything the Star had said, but something seemed unsettling. And then it happened.
Prajna felt the inverted flame within it blaze up and dance in satisfaction at the sudden warmth and familiarity of Varun's lips, his rough style of displaying affection. Unlike
other times they had -violently- kissed though, Prajna's essence seemed to restrain itself and translate only Varun's passion and a little of his natural body heat, rather than consuming his entire warmth, into a soft pinkness displayed across Prajna's cheeks. Still, when Varun released the androgynous soul, it felt tired.
"I am Varun, and you are Prajna. This is good. You are mine. I like you, and I will keep you."
Prajna mouthed the words silently, "You are mine." You are mine. The words didn't seem enough for some reason, but Prajna was still, emotionally and physically, satisfied. For now. Prajna felt sleepy and so oddly warm and comforted. It found trouble in keeping its eyes open suddenly; It had only taken a little bit of Varun's temperature and yet he was still too much, perhaps, for the Star to "digest." Prajna remembered the first time this happened between them and how quickly Varun had exhausted it that time as well. The older Frei watched as its younger, more enthusiastic companion adjusted to his short new locks and confidently growled, in that rough voice of his Prajna had grown to like so much, "I will be the strength you like so much."
Prajna couldn't help but bare a sleepy smile and nod obediently. Its features were surprisingly feminine and innocent at this moment, its cheeks unusually tinted and its hair messy as if it had just gotten out of bed. The Star replied sweetly to Varun's bold promise, "Prajna will always be here, so come whenever Varun wants. Especially if you miss me." It smiled and poked out its tongue playfully.
"I will be back. " A firm nod, the Leviathan flared his fins. For now, he had the problem of his scales to deal with, his insolent human to find again. Then, he would come find Prajna, and he would be stronger than ever. What would happened from there, Varun had no idea, but he didn't have the brain cells to spare to think quite that hard. "Do not forget what you told today." The sea creature was certain this conversation would never leave his mind and this haircut would not cease to leave an impression on his soul. Brushing a hand across Prajna's soft face, the redhead dipped his head and began a slow retreat. "I will find Kinsey. I will be the lightning. And then I will be back for Prajna."
Prajna's thick crimson lashes shaded its cerulean gaze as it listened to Varun declare his plans. He was so childishly charming, simple but entertaining and Prajna couldn't help but smirk. It nodded when told to remember, as if signing off on some life contract; the Star would make sure to remember so long as Varun made sure to follow through. The Fallen Star was starting to feel lazy, lying against the couch, but, after feeling Varun's hand warm and then retreat from its cool cheek, pushed itself alert and up, following him to the door. As Prajna swung the door open and watched Varun slither out carefully, it caught a final glimpse of Varun's new hairstyle. With a quick ruffle of his hair, Prajna burst out into a sweet but hearty laugh, "Get to Prajna before getting to hair with the scissors next time, okay Varun?"
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