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 Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 7:53 am
Okay. Me and my boyfriend dated for nine months, then he broke up with me after ignoring me for two weeks. We just got back together about a month and a half ago, not even. I moved, and I couldn't contact him for like a week. (By the way this is long-distance ~ he's not a peddo, i've talked to his parents on webcam and i'm friends with his sisters so don't give me that lecture. QQ) Anyway, when I came back online, so so eager to talk to him, he didn't reply to my messages on facebook. So I figured maybe he was away from his comp, but then I kept seeing him go idle and available, so I got kind of angry. I told him I needed to talk to him (I was having a bit of a breakdown then.) And thats all I said "N___, I need you right now." No reply.
Anyway. I got on this game we met on just for s**ts and giggles, and he was on. I messaged him there. Annnd he replied saying he didn't feel like talking. When I asked why he said because he had a breakdown the day before, and didn't want to talk about it. I said okay, and tried to give him his space. His friends are my friends as well so a bit later I was invited to a group chat with him, and Wes. They were talking about how they need to talk to each other later on, well - about his breakdown. So then it was like a stab to the chest that his friends know, but oh nooo - he didn't feeeel like telling me. We've never really had a trust issue, only one in the beginning and that got resolved so I don't understand what i'm doing wrong.
But whatever, I tried not to get so butthurt over it and waited another day. The most I got out of him was him wanting to know where his robe (on that one game) was, and he sent me a funny video.
That's it. I've had it, I can't stand worrying about him 24/7. What bugs me the most is that he was the one always saying "Your my girlfriend, you're supposed to tell me anything and everything!" and ever since then I DID, but now he's not the one telling me jack crap and he knows i'm so worried about him!
OKAY. So now I wrote up this thing last night to say to him, and I want to know if its too harsh for whatever he's going through, or if its too soft or not worth it. I need to know how to approach him because this is crazy.
"Hey N___, I understand you have a lot of your plate, but you need to talk to me. What happened to trust and being able to tell each other anything? I refuse to be ignored for days, left worrying all the time. But as always i'll start, you told me to go to you when I had urges, but I didn't because you said you had a breakdown of some sort, so i'll tell you now. You know when I sent you that message saying "I really need you right now." I really really did. I almost killed myself a few days ago. I needed to talk to you.
But then again every time I talk to you, you make me feel useless and annoying so do me a favor and actually reply to this and tell me if you even want to be in this."
Is that good? Should I add more? Should I take out some? Please help me!
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Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:22 am
Hi EssOhEss smile
It sounds like you yourself, have a lot more on your plate than just your loing distance boyfriend being a little distant. Are you sure having a long distance boyfriend is the right decision at this time in your life?
It sounds to me like you're both having a hard time communicating with each other, and that you're both upset (ie. having breakdowns) about things happening at home in your lives, and because you guys are long distance, it's hard to be there for each other and comfort each other. You can only do so much over facebook and through a chat game.
If you're depressed, maybe having a boyfriend isn't the right thing right now, especially one who cant be there often enough to support you.
With regards to the letter you're going to send him, it's never fair to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend "I almost killed myself." That puts a lot of pressure and worry onto them. Especially for your boyfriend, whos so far away, it might be really hard for him to face the fact that he can't be at your side helping you through it, and protecting you. Be firm with him, but don't be harsh.
I hope this all made sense! although it may not have been the reply you were looking for sweatdrop
Hope it works out! Be safe smile
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fred_dani_danielly Captain
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Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:37 am
fred_dani_danielly Hi EssOhEss smile
It sounds like you yourself, have a lot more on your plate than just your loing distance boyfriend being a little distant. Are you sure having a long distance boyfriend is the right decision at this time in your life?
It sounds to me like you're both having a hard time communicating with each other, and that you're both upset (ie. having breakdowns) about things happening at home in your lives, and because you guys are long distance, it's hard to be there for each other and comfort each other. You can only do so much over facebook and through a chat game.
If you're depressed, maybe having a boyfriend isn't the right thing right now, especially one who cant be there often enough to support you.
With regards to the letter you're going to send him, it's never fair to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend "I almost killed myself." That puts a lot of pressure and worry onto them. Especially for your boyfriend, whos so far away, it might be really hard for him to face the fact that he can't be at your side helping you through it, and protecting you. Be firm with him, but don't be harsh.
I hope this all made sense! although it may not have been the reply you were looking for sweatdrop
Hope it works out! Be safe smile
Thank you so much for your input, you don't know how much it means to me right now. <3
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Posted: Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:56 am
EssOhEss fred_dani_danielly Hi EssOhEss smile
It sounds like you yourself, have a lot more on your plate than just your loing distance boyfriend being a little distant. Are you sure having a long distance boyfriend is the right decision at this time in your life?
It sounds to me like you're both having a hard time communicating with each other, and that you're both upset (ie. having breakdowns) about things happening at home in your lives, and because you guys are long distance, it's hard to be there for each other and comfort each other. You can only do so much over facebook and through a chat game.
If you're depressed, maybe having a boyfriend isn't the right thing right now, especially one who cant be there often enough to support you.
With regards to the letter you're going to send him, it's never fair to tell your boyfriend/girlfriend "I almost killed myself." That puts a lot of pressure and worry onto them. Especially for your boyfriend, whos so far away, it might be really hard for him to face the fact that he can't be at your side helping you through it, and protecting you. Be firm with him, but don't be harsh.
I hope this all made sense! although it may not have been the reply you were looking for sweatdrop
Hope it works out! Be safe smile
Thank you so much for your input, you don't know how much it means to me right now. <3You're very welcome! heart
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fred_dani_danielly Captain
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