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 Posted: Sat Jul 09, 2011 8:39 am
Well, I was in love with two of them, but now I think it's the one. Please ignore the fact that I'm so polyamorous. If I could help it, I would.
I am just now starting to accept the fact that I'm bisexual, and it leaves me confused and hurting sometimes. I don't understand why I'm so mean to this girl that I'm supposed to love. I had to text her an apology because I've been kind of a b***h. I see now that I'm just jealous of the love and purity that she radiates. At one point, I was like that, but now I've had to completely stop talking to some of my classmates because they are such superb bitches.
I feel like I've literally been taken and transported into the movie "mean girls." I used to be so kind and sweet, and "innocent." But then going back to the mental hospital seems to have caused a major attitude shift in me and that's what bugs me. I don't understand why I treat Courtney the way I do. My entire school will pick on me, acting like they think I'm cute when really they think of me as a massive airhead. I used to joke around and make myself the object of ridicule, all "for your entertainment" but now In see that even though I was just kidding around they were quite serious in their dislike of me.
Britanny, Ashley D, all of them...bitches to me. What hurts is that they'll pretend to like me when they really think of me as a massive idiot. Even my friend Tasha sometimes, even though she's kind, can be extremely condescending.
I think that I'd know if I were pregnant, thank you. So I gained a little weight. Who hasn't before?
I'm going to keep giving these people compliments, but, I'm through with most of them. But Courtney, Courtney has changed and it's for the BETTER. She just radiates this inner beauty, even when she's exhausted from working constantly that I envy, and want to possess.
How can I stop bullying my friend and just love on her? Do I maybe need some space?
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Posted: Mon Oct 17, 2011 10:35 pm
I know exactly how you feel with everything even the being Bi I am and I found out in middle now I'm in my second yr of college and that girl Ashley D I had a bitchy girl with that same name lol well think about it this way if you think of her with someone else it may make you jealous into loving her more or think about if you are truly cruel to her and she doesn't want to be around you you might loose her forever is this girl straight?
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