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 Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2012 5:49 am
Var frowned, concerned. She was acting strangely, but it was clear that, whatever it was, she didn't want to say it outright. His worry for her swelled until she met his gaze directly and he realized she wasn't looking at him like a hurt friend. She was looking at him as if she wasn't sure who he was, as if she was confused. The realization hit him like a spear of starlight.
Someone had told her. She knew.
He stared back for a moment, feeling his heart plummet into his stomach, then he dropped his gaze to her paws. Paws like she had stepped into a fog and carried some of it away with her. He felt his stomach twist further at the reminder. That was the change. She had spoken to someone in that short span of time apart and they had told her about his.. deficiency. Not for the first time, he thought he should have told her first, but he knew what the result of that was. It was this. Actually, it was amazing she had come at all... except of course she would. She was Shalise. She wouldn't have just not shown up. He didn't think, anyway. This was a side of her he hadn't dealt with, a side with variables he didn't know.
Then again, he wouldn't be dealing with any sides of her anymore, would he? No more than he did any other member of the pack. The dream, the fantasy of having a friend outside of Quin, was over.
He clenched his teeth for a moment, then forced himself to bow from the situation with grace. Shalise wouldn't say anything and Var was fairly certain he couldn't stand to hear whatever she might have to say if she thought of it anyway. Better to leave her an easy exit and save what little standing he might have left in her eyes. He lifted his eyes back to hers, his expression gone polite.
"Excuse me, but I have to go. I know we had planned to go out, but I have to meet with Mu'sha sooner than I expected. Perhaps we can pick up our plans at another time, when it's more convenient for the both of us."
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2012 5:54 am
The easy camaraderie was gone, but they didn't have to say anything for that understanding to be there. It was a testament to the connection they had shared before... before. They both knew the secret was out and that things had changed between them. (Hadn't they?) His excuse for leaving was transparent enough, but Shalise couldn't find it in her to object or even call him on it. The news was still too fresh for her to accept it and continue on as they had been.
She matched him, gaze for gaze, silent for a moment as he looked at her with distance in his eyes and she fought herself internally. Wasn't he the same Var she always knew? Why did things suddenly feel different just because she knew something that was already true?
"All right."
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Posted: Mon Jan 30, 2012 5:57 am
Kevarian turned and walked away, stiff-backed and forcing himself to feel cold and blank, rather than allowing himself to wallow in the depression threatening to swamp him. It was a plant-dream to think he could hide a secret from her that the entire pack already knew.
Distantly, behind him, he heard Shalise weakly call out his name, but he ignored it and kept walking. He couldn't face her pity, if he was lucky enough to have even earned that. Without knowing what else to do, Var headed towards the Shrine. Of all places on the Aves lands, it was the spot that had been ingrained in him from his childhood as a safe place. Right now, it was the only place he could go. Shalise wouldn't follow.
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