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CHAPTER 1

Nick turned off the TV; he was sick of hearing about a 'Red Gyarados.' That was probably the worst documentaries he had ever watched. The second he turned it off, his mother bitched from downstairs. Apparently Barry was obsessively calling for me on the phone. "Go talk to that kid before he drives me nuts." she demanded. "Yes, mother..." Nick sighed heavily.

Barry was a total idiot with ADD and he was quite possibly dropped when he was a child. Slowly but surely, Nick made his way down the stairs, out the door, and started on his way to Barry's house. Twinleaf was a small town; apparently only four or six people lived there. But that would classify it as a hamlet at best? Whatever.

Before he could even knock on the door, Barry charged out and slammed into Nick. They both fell and they both grunted in pain. "God damn it, Barry. Can't yo-" Nick was cut short by Barry. "I forgot something in my house! You better not be late or I will tax you one more poke than your wallet can carry!" he exclaimed, getting up and running back into his house.

"What the... What? Late? Where?" Nick asked, puzzled. He decided to follow Barry into his house and up the stairs to his room. "Where are we going?" he asked. "To Lake Verity! We're gonna find a Red Gyarados!" he answered quickly, grabbing his bag and starting for the stairs. "Great. Because we can't possibly hint at the fact we're re-making Gold and Silver any more." Nick rolled his eyes.

The pair walked outside of Twinleaf Town into Route 201. "Uhh... Are you sure we should be out here without any Poke-" he was again cut short by Barry. "Who cares? We're not going into any tall grass! We'll be fine!" he laughed as he made a run for the Lake. :Wh- What? Wait!" Nick cried out, trying to catch up to the idiot who ran ahead of him.

When Nick finally caught up, Barry was jumping up and down in front of the sign that read 'Lake Verity.' "I can't wait to see a red Gyarados!" he exclaimed. "You are aware that shiny Pokemon are 8 in 65536, right Barry?" Nick retorted. Barry simply stared blankly at him. "Lets go!" he then burst out, running into the area of the Lake. Nick sighed and followed. As they headed in, a girl and an old man suspiciously walked by in quite the hurry. A joke crossed Nick's mind, but he didn't dare say it.

After a few seconds of yelling for a Gyarados to come up, Barry grew bored. "You see? I told you. Dumbass." Nick growled. He turned his eye to a briefcase that looked like it had been left behind by the old man and the girl. "Wonder what's in there?" he asked Barry. Without wasting a second, Barry ran to the briefcase and popped it open. "It's rude to do that, you know..." Nick berated him. "Look, pokeballs!" Barry pointed out. He grabbed one of them and played around with it.

"Shouldn't we not be doing this?" Nick asked, walking over to the briefcase and grabbing another one. "Who cares? Free Pokeballs!" Barry answered. "Starly! Starly!" the cries of two Starly came from the tall grass. "What a good time we chose to came, huh?" Barry smiled. "Come here, Starly! You're mine now!" he tossed the Pokeball at one of the small birds.

"Star?" it bobbed its head curiously. The Pokeball smacked it right in the face; and much to Barry's disappointment, it didn't try to capture it. Seconds later, he was elated to discover a small turtle had erupted out of the Pokeball. "Turtwig!" it happily cried. The Starly slowly composed itself, and its friend turned to face Nick. They cried out angrily.

"Uhhh... I guess this one has a Pokemon in it too..." Nick blinked. He casually threw the Pokeball. Out of it erupted a small, blue Penguin. It sighed and dropped its shoulders with a weary sigh. A small tear fell across its face. "Piplup...." it cried. "Wow. Talk about angst." he commented. In the distance, Nick could hear Barry chasing the Starly down with his new Pokemon. He once again turned his attention to see Piplup getting beaten by Starly.

"Hey, what the hell are you doing? Kick his a**!" Nick shouted at the small Penguin. It turned back to face him after taking a Tackle to the face. A small tear trickled down his cheek again. It then turned to its attacker and punched it. With a single Pound, the Starly fell, knocked out. "Piplup..." it angsted again. The Pokemon then proceeded to pick up its own Pokeball and let himself into it.

"... Good Job?" Nick blinked, picking up the Pokeball. He glanced over at Barry, who was threatening to kill the Starly he had brutally assaulted. "Idiot." he commented, turning his back on him. He made his way back home, holding the Pokeball in his hand. "I guess this means you're my Pokemon now." he said out loud. "I'll call you... Kath Jr." he smiled to himself. The Piplup angsted again within it's Pokeball. As he drew close to Twinleaf, Nick spotted the same old man and girl that had been at the lake. He also heard the distinct sound of Barry running. Hr turned back to see he was running with the briefcase.

"Look, Nick! I got another Pokemon! Ha Ha!" he mocked him. Suddenly, he was whacked upside the head, and the briefcase was removed from his grasp. "I'll be taking that." the old man said bitterly. "Punks." he exclaimed, starting to walk away. The girl bit her lip nervously and looked at the old man, then at the two boys. She shot them a weak smile and then ran to catch up with the old man. "Ow...." Barry protested. "d**k... Whatever. At least I managed to swipe these." Barry celebrated, holding up two red cases.

"Give me that." Nick said, taking one. "Huh. Weird." he noted, stuffing the odd device into his pocket. "Well... My mom is a b***h... I have no friends... And now I have a Pokemon. By all definition, I'm free. Bye, Barry." Nick smiled, walking in the direction the girl had gone in. "I thought I was the stupid one. What, no excuse plot? You just walk out? That's it?" Barry yelled after Nick.

Chapter 3

After healing Biderp and Kath Jr, Nick headed out to Route 202. Finally, his journey was picking up speed. Within a few minutes of wandering the tall grass, he spotted a small creature... He slowly approached it. It let out a small cry, unaware of Nick's presence. "Kricketot!" Nick knew that the small Pokemon was capable of immense power with it's deadly Bide move. So instead of battling it and risking the death of his precious Pokemon, he tossed a Pokeball at it.

It shook once, twice, three times. It was caught! Nick triumphantly scooped up the Pokeball. "I'm going to call you... Deedles." he announced. "You are going to be one badass ********, Deedles." Nick grinned, gently placing it above Kath Jr and Biderp's Pokeballs. A small angsty cry was heard, and a soft 'Derp' as well.

Nick slowly worked his way up Route 202, until he came across a little boy. "FIGHT ME, COWARD." he challenged in a thick Russian accent. "What the hell?!" Nick exclaimed, backing away. "I WILL KILL YOU AND KILL YOU AND KILL YOU." he threatened. He tossed a Pokeball, and out came a Starly. "скворец!" The Starly exclaimed.

Needless to say, Nick was confused. Very confused. Maybe his Team Fortress 2 addiction was getting to his head. He blinked and tossed a pokeball. "Go, Deedles!" he exclaimed. However, much to his disappointment, Biderp came out of the Pokeball. "Umm... Well... Okay... Tackle!" Nick ordered. "быструю атаку!" The small kid ordered. Before Biderp could even move, small text reading 'Critical Hit!' erupted from his head. Starly stood beside Biderp, he had moved so fast, he hadn't seen him move. Biderp then fell over, dead.

"... FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-" Nick started. He truly was enraged. He furiously tossed Deedles' Pokeball. "Kricketot!" it proclaimed. "Use BIDE!" Nick ordered. Deedles nodded and jumped up into the air, everything that was flashed before Nick's eyes, the leaves flew off trees, grass was uprooted, and dust flew everywhere. The universe was created and destroyed as he was surrounded by energy. Suddenly, everything cleared, and Deedles was standing in place. Not a single muscle on his body moved.

Nick watched in awe as Deedles absorbed attacks from Starly, without breaking a sweat. After a minute of being attacked, Deedles opened it's eyes. He took a look at the Starly and narrowed his eyes. In a flash of pure energy, the little bird Pokemon spontaneously combusted. It's trainer had also apparently vanished, as he was nowhere to be seen. Deedles walked up to Nick, then hopped cheerfully.

Kath Jr let out an angsty cry from it's Pokeball, feeling weak compared to Deedles. Nick silently recalled Deedles and continued up Route 202, not knowing the dangers that lay ahead on his journey...

MEANWHILE...

A man in an odd silver outfit ran down a long hallway, struggling to keep an odd blue wig on. He stopped at a door with a massive 'G' on it. He punched in a code, trying to catch his breath. The door opened after pounding the final digit in; and the man swiftly ran in. "Sir!" he huffed, staring up at a balcony. He saluted the silhouette of a tall man with a hand gesture. "Officer Dawn has reported that Subject 'N' has been started on his way." The figure stepped closer to the edge of the balcony. He was a toned, powerful man, with a firm, stoic expression. His hair was blue and spiky, and he had a firm posture.

"Good."

CHAPTER 5

"I guess... I'll send out... I don't know, Kath Jr." Nick replied, upset by Barry's challenge. "Pip..." Kath Jr complained. He knew what lay ahead if Nick made him stay in battle. "What?" he looked down at Piplup. He then rolled his eyes. "Fine, you p***y. It's not like Bubbles hurts anyone!" he harshly lashed out at him. Before Kath Jr could start crying again, he recalled it and instead sent out Pidgey 2.0.

"You need to get stro- HEY!" Nick yelled at the Starly, it was trying to take a bite out of Deedles again. "Can we start soon?" Barry complained. "Shut up! And you, cut it out! Use Quick Attack!" Nick ordered his Starly. Although Nick's was many times weaker than Barry's, it landed a strong Quick Attack. "STARLY, USE GROWL!" Barry ordered. His male Starly growled seductively at Pidgey 2.0, which happened to be a female. "Uhh..." Nick said blankly, watching the two of them Growl at each other.

"... That's it. Recall!" he ordered. Pidgey 2.0 went back into her Pokeball; and was then replaced by Kath Jr on the battlefield. "P-"it started. "SHUT UP NO ANGSTING BUBBLE GO GO GO GO GO!" Nick yelled at Kath Jr. The Pokemon jumped, and nervously spat bubbles at the Starly that sat before it. The Bubbles lazily drifted over to Starly and on impact exploded with violent force, blowing Barry and Starly back a couple of feet. Barry let out a groan and ordered the Starly to use Quick Attack. Kath Jr was hit, but before he could complain again, Nick was yelling at him again. "MOAR BUBBLES!" he yelled.

As Everything Nice erupted from Kath Jr's mouth, Deedles was growing anxious. He was one level away from reaching a power only legendary Pokemon could ever hope to achieve. However, he also knew that Nick was probably going to send out Pidgey 2.0 to train him a bit. So he had to play sneaky... As Nick foolishly barked orders at the poor Piplup, Deedles grabbed Pidgey 2.0's Pokeball and called it out. With a motion quicker than the eye could catch, Deedles punched Pidgey 2.0 in the gut and put it back in the Pokeball.

Barry's Starly lay unconscious on the floor, Kath Jr had landed a decisive Bubble attack that had destroyed it's nervous system. "Piplup..." it cried in pain. It had sustained serious wounds from the Starly's vicious Quick Attack. Nick reached for Pidgey 2.0's Pokeball, but he inspected the Pokeball's Damage Report on it. "Huh... Looks like you took a beating too. Alright, Deedles, it's your turn!" Nick smiled. Deedles cheerily hopped up and down, then made his way into the battleground.

"Nice one, Nick! But that stupid bug is no match for my Turtiwig!" Barry taunted, sending his Turtwig into battle. "Turt, Turt TURTWIG!" it cried. "Alright, Deedles. You know what to do!" Nick smiled at Deedles. The Kricketot turned his head to nod at him, then simply froze in place, not moving a muscle. Barry suddenly burst into laughter. "THAT'S your plan? Let me beat him up? YOU'RE SO STUPID!" he mocked. Nick rolled his eyes at Barry, getting ready for another amazing sight. "Turtwig, beat the crap out of it!" Barry commanded.

Deedles simply smiled the second Turtwig laid it's second attack on him. A Critical Hit Tackle. Suddenly, Deedles started to glow. The glowing got brighter and brighter, until it became blinding. Turtiwig was knocked back into a tree as the glowing stopped and erupted. Struggling to stay awake, it spotted the figure of a bigger Pokemon approaching it. It was orange, and it had a huge mustache. It's arms looked like blades, and what appeared to be a cape swayed in the wind as it walked ever so closely to it.There was something on it's head, an odd hat with a feather on it.

The Pokemon leaned in close to Turtiwg and whispered "Nunca me subestimes." the thick Spanish accent threatened. "Nunca jamas." it added. It then raised one of it's blade-like arms and chopped the small branch growing off Turtwig's head. Dramatically, it turned around and slowly walked out of the dust cloud. Little Deedles had walked into the battle a boy... And emerged a MAN.

Nick and Deedles both shared the same facial expression as Deedles emerged from the dust cloud, more badass than ever. Nick heard no sounds, but he knew Barry was cursing him and his name, he saw him running with his Turtwig to the Pokemon Center.

Deedles slowly lost the Spanish wear he had put on to scare Turtwig, and then nodded to Nick. "Come on. Let's go to the Pokemon Center." Nick smiled at the freshly evolved team mate. This was sure to cause Kath Jr much angst, but he didn't care at the moment. Deedles had the highest attack out of the Pokemon on the team, so he needed him.

As the Pokemon were healed, Nick was surprised to hear Nurse Joy gasp. "What's the matter?" he asked, worriedly. She was looking at Deedles, and she looked truly shocked. "Y-your Pokemon... It has... Pokerus..." she said. "That all... Have... Pokerus..." she said nervously. "I'm warning you... Those Pokemon will become monsters... Too powerful for their own good..." she said, horrified. Nurse Joy slowly backed away, leaving Nick to his Pokemon.

Deedles shrugged at Nick at the statement, while Kath Jr was confused. He did not know if he should be offended at being called a monster, or be honored to be call powerful. There was also the fact that Deedles, Nick's third Pokemon had evolved and was too powerful for him to surpass. This was causing Kath Jr a lot of angst, which made him wish he knew Cut. But all he knew was Bubbles, Growl, and Pound. That made him angst even more, knowing his shallow movepool was not useful. A tear slid down his cheek.

Pidgey 2.0 on the other hand, did not care. She was too busy thinking about Barry's Starly. "Oh s**t! I have limited time to do this... I need to find a Pokemon that can hold Pokerus for me just in ca-" Nick looked at the Town Map on the wall. Then he smiled an evil smile. The kind of smile the Grinch smiles.

LATER...
"Pokerus the Magikarp!" Nick said, holding up a flailing fish. He had marched all the way back down to Twinleaf to fish in the tiny pond there. "Now, to the box you go!" he said. Nick then realized there were no PC's in Twinleaf. "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

To be continued...

CHAPTER 7

Nick's grin faded slowly, realizing he was still hungry and the money in his pockets would all go towards Pokeballs. "Ugh... Alright, listen up, team!" he exclaimed, calling out the entire team. "We need to take down this town's Gym leader so we can have some spare cash. And by the looks of this town... The Gym Leader obviously uses Rock or Ground. Kath Jr, it's all up to you now." Nick said, kneeling down to look at the only Pokemon capable of taking down the leader.

"Pip?" it exclaimed, taken back by this. "You can do it. You just need to get over your angst."he assured. "Pip... Pip.. PIPLUP!" Kath Jr jumped up and down, gaining confidence. Deedles cheered for him slowly, and the rest of the team slowly joined him. The enthused team marched back into town, Nick and Kath Jr at the front.

Upon arriving at the Gym, Nick noticed Barry was there, and the kid who had called him a noob was also there. "Ugh. Move, d**k. We're fighting the gym leader first." he said, pushing Barry aside. "Nice try! But the Gym is locked. Roark isn't here!" Barry answered. "Roark, huh? Well, let's go find his stupid a**. I want food." Nick turned to his team. "Sound good?" he added. Barry grinned. "I'll help!" he chimed in. "... Okay? You look over there, and we'll go explore this side of town." Nick pointed to the mine.

"Kay." Barry said. The second Nick and company were out of sight, he sat down in front of the Gym, awaiting Roark's return.

Kath Jr was still full of confidence, and he stormed into the mines first. "He- WAIT DAMN YOU!" Nick yelled at him, giving chase. However, Rockgina, Blitzkrieg, and Deedles were not fast enough to keep up. Pidgey 2.0 however, had followed Kath Jr. into the mines. "I hate you guys sometimes." he uttered under his breath, recalling his Pokemon. "Wait up!" Nick yelled. He passed by the mangled corpse of a dead Zubat. The ground around it was wet, which meant Piplup was nearby. "KATH JR. GET THE ******** OVER HERE." Nick spotted his Pokemon picking on a bunch of Geodude and Starly 2.0 harassing some miner's Machops.

The second Nick yelled at them, the two Pokemon started glowing. The glowing attracted the attention of all the miners, who gathered around to watch. Nick was dumbfounded, his team was growing stronger. As the glowing stopped, two new Pokemon stood where Kath Jr and Pidgey 2.0 once stood. "Prinplup!" "Staravia!" they sounded off. "Nice." Nick said with a rather interested facial expression. The energy from evolution slowly vanished into the nearby miners.

"Great job~!" someone squeaked from behind Nick. "Nice Pokemon~!" it added. "Thank you?" he responded, turning to meet a man who looked like the construction worker from the Village People. "I'm Roark, the Gym Leader of this town~! Why don't you come down to my Gym and we'll see what's what~!" he cheered, popping his right leg up. As he passed by Nick, he turned around to check him out. Nick sighed, his palm meeting his face. "... You know... You know what? Come on, Blitzkrieg... We're training you. I don't want you to get left behind after this..."

---
"Luxio!" Blitzkrieg cried out, it had recently evolved. "Alright, team! Let's heal and go kick that weirdo's a**!" Nick rallied his Pokemon. He was proud of Kath Jr, he had stopped angsting and was looking stronger than ever. It was just odd that he knew Metal Claw despite not even having fingers or talons... Now, Nick stood in front of the gym. As he opened the door to go in, Barry charged out, holding a badge. "Ha ha ha! Loser!" he taunted, running off into the town. "O-kay?" Nick said aloud, entering the gym.

He made his way up to the perch where Roark sat. "Ooh, Jesus christ!" Roark exclaimed, sitting up at the sight of Nick. "Mmm, let's battle~!" Roark licked his lips, winking at Nick. He stood up and dropped a Pokeball. "Geodude!" it said blankly. "Kath Jr, shut that fool up. Bubble." Nick commanded. Kath Jr simply spat two bubbles at Geodude, which exploded violently. Roark's Geodude then fainted. "Are you gonna fight, or are you gonna sit there and be a p***y?" Nick taunted him.

"Ugh, shut up! I'll kick your a** with my rock hard pokemon~!" he snapped back."Wow, Roark. I didn't think you could get any gayer." "Go Onix!" he answered. Nick then looked up at the Pokemon's phallic-looking horn. "... Your daddy must be real proud of you." Nick sighed. "Kath Jr, return. Kick his a**, Deedles!" Nick said, launching Deedle's Pokeball at Onix. "Use Bide!" Nick ordered.

Deedles nodded and froze in place. "Ooh, easy pickings~!" Roark jumped cheerily. "Onix, Rock Throw!" he commanded. A stone fell on Deedles as Onix complied. "Deedles, no!" Nick yelled. He could tell Deedles was about to bite the dust. "Come on, Onix, one more!" he ordered. Onix grabbed another rock with its tail and launched it Deedles. Nick shut his eyes, trying to picture going on without Deedles. He opened his eyes to discover a huge rock lay beside Deedles, and Onix was cut into a million pieces. "... Good job, Deedles. Get in here." he recalled the Pokemon, which was breathing heavily.

"Jesus Christ~!" Roark answered with a lisp. "Go, Cranidos!" he said, tossing out his last Pokemon. "... I bet you like to give head." Nick dropped a very bad pun at the sight of the Pokemon's cranium. "Go, Kath Jr." Nick smiled. "Prinplup!" it cheered, approaching the Cranidos. "Stealth Rock!" Roark ordered. Cranidos shook it's head around, and rocks appeared on Nick's side of the battlefield. "... Okay? Bubble, Kath Jr." Nick commanded.

The bubbles impacted on Cranidos, but it still stood. "Headbutt!" Roark retaliated. Cranidos charged at Kath Jr, and hit it square in the chest. Kath Jr gagged and staggered backwards. "Time to win this. Use Metal Claw!" Nick ordered. "Prin... Plup!" it cried out, hitting Cranidos with its wing. It made a metallic clang, and Cranidos fell. "... Jesus Christ..." Roark sighed, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a badge. "******** yeah!" Nick celebrated.

"Great job, guys! We got the coal badge!" Nick grinned at Kath Jr and patted Deedles' Pokeball. "Now get out! Jesus Christ!" Roark said, pushing Nick out of the Gym. "Oh well. Now let's go! First we heal, and then we go North!" he announced, walking towards the Pokemon Center. After healing and having a quick meal, he walked out to Route 207. He went up to a slope and tried climbing it, but mysteriously, he could not climb it. "********..." Nick said. "We're going the long way! Back to Jubilife!" he sighed, walking back into Orebough, then heading to Route 202 again.

LATER...
Roark made his way into the mines, walking casually. He passed by the group of miners and reached into his pocket. A small device came out his pocket with a red button. It was quickly pressed, and all the miners suddenly stopped what they were doing and became wide-eyed. With very clunky movements, they made their way behind Roark and stopped, in a perfect formation.

He then inserted tubes into their mouth, that in turn were connected to a piece of rock on the wall. After all the miners were connected to the wall, Roark pushed a rock on the wall, which made the top part rotate into a two-way conference. "Sir." Roark bowed. "Evolution energy has been captured. I will be sending it your way right now." he said.

"Very good job, Officer Asteroid." a tall man with Blue Hair said on the other end of the screen. "You are of great assistance to our plan. You are guaranteed a spot in the new world." Roark grinned. "Thank you, sir. Is there any way I could be of of assistance anywhere else?" he asked. "No, you have done your part. Commander Mars?" he said, turning around. "Yes sir." a woman with red hair approached him. "Send two Grunts to Jubilife. They will stall Subject 'N' and buy you more time for you to take Valley Windworks... We are close to applying this energy. Their research will prove very valuable for our... Cause."

"Sir, Yes sir." Mars saluted, heading off. Roark saluted, and ended the conversation. He pressed a button on the TV, and the energy started draining from the miners and into the TV.


"Charon. How close are we to the end of Project Red Chain?" the blue haired man asked; turning to a small man, with many years of experience. "All in due time, Master Cyrus... All in due time..." he responded gently.

To be continued...