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Umi-Cho

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PostPosted: Sat Nov 27, 2010 12:34 am


Poetic abilities tend to present themselves best to me when I am deeply enveloped in a certain emotion. For instance, this poem was born in a fit of rage...

Anger burns through my veins,
Burning away at my chest.
How I go day by day with such uncertainty
The truth evades my senses

Fear chills my bones
A cold grip tightening around my heart
Sucking the life from my tormented soul
Why do I put up with this

Trouble follows me like a looming shadow
Tendrils of darkness snake out toward me
They grasp my limbs and pull
Tearing me assunder

One voice thick with terror calls to me
Another drowns me in hatred
Which road do I take
How can I save everyone when I myself am lost

I save others
Or so I think
My strength is in my head
An inflated ego that I never realized was there

Old wounds open setting a red river flowing
The rivlets trickle down my skin
The past returns to the present
I feel the weight begin crushing me

Down...down...down...
Into a darkness that holds it's arms wide
Ready to welcome me
To watch as I give in and die


It has no real title. I don't know if it's that good...so I'd love critisism of any kind. Please don't flame me though. 3nodding
PostPosted: Sat Dec 18, 2010 11:43 am


Umi-Cho
Poetic abilities tend to present themselves best to me when I am deeply enveloped in a certain emotion. For instance, this poem was born in a fit of rage...

Anger burns through my veins,
Burning away at my chest.
How I go day by day with such uncertainty
The truth evades my senses

Fear chills my bones
A cold grip tightening around my heart
Sucking the life from my tormented soul
Why do I put up with this

Trouble follows me like a looming shadow
Tendrils of darkness snake out toward me
They grasp my limbs and pull
Tearing me assunder

One voice thick with terror calls to me
Another drowns me in hatred
Which road do I take
How can I save everyone when I myself am lost

I save others
Or so I think
My strength is in my head
An inflated ego that I never realized was there

Old wounds open setting a red river flowing
The rivlets trickle down my skin
The past returns to the present
I feel the weight begin crushing me

Down...down...down...
Into a darkness that holds it's arms wide
Ready to welcome me
To watch as I give in and die


It has no real title. I don't know if it's that good...so I'd love critisism of any kind. Please don't flame me though. 3nodding



I simply love it:heart in my opinion no critiscm needed easy to read and it stayed on track love it!

waterwitch24

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Poetry

 
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