|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 1:44 am
Bullying.
Most of us are familiar with this, having it happen at some point in our lives. However, it seems to be quite prevelent in todays culture. News about suicides from having been bullied is becoming common. What needs to change here? The ideals and thoughts behind such actions? The punishment for those who do such things? Or all of the above? What do you think?
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 7:12 pm
Bullying is nothing new nor is suicide as a result of it. It has been a social epidemic in Japan for decades, and it certainly happened in America before now. The media is only choosing to cover it. Yes, the popularity of the Internet has made bullying a bit more prevalent and inescapable, but I also feel like America's societal morals would still cause a number of teen suicides.
I was bullied in some form or other during nearly all of my school-age years. In preschool and early elementary school, this was in the form of being told by the other kids that I couldn't play with them. Then by third grade, it was because I was overweight and super nerdy, so my homework would be stolen or I'd be picked on for my weight. This continued into junior high, where I soon also was tormented for being an outcast (a goth and later emo) and for coming out as a lesbian (I have since realized I am pansexual or gender blind). In eighth grade, a boy I had been almost-friends with in elementary school started harassing me daily, asking if I had sacrificed any goats and the like. This continued until my teacher told the principal and he was suspended for a few days. But, more often than not, the bullies went unpunished. I can't tell you how many times I thought of suicide, beginning in fifth grade, but I never had the courage to act upon it. And I am so glad that I didn't let the ignorant comments of a bunch of jerks end my life.
Thankfully, I had a very supportive family. Every child needs to know he is important, even if peers are telling him otherwise. He needs to realize his self-worth and talents, and these need to be reinforced by family members, friends, and teachers. Things really do get better, and it's up to the community to remind these kids of that.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 9:10 pm
What makes bullies so hard to deal with is the very nature of what a bully is. Shall we punish them? Sure, but we can rest assured that said bullies would just pass it right along as soon as any normal school punishment is over.
Shall we "educate" them, as so many other suggest? What a naive and misguided idea. Children have an immense capacity for cruelty, often more so than adults, in the right context, dependent on their developmental stage. Make no mistake, they know exactly what they're doing. They just don't give a damn. Sure, they don't want their victim dead, but mostly because it might get back to them, rather than real, honest concern.
I remember once in some gym class, this one kid spent the whole first period being a complete d**k to me, entirely unprovoked. I talked to the teacher after wards (if you count making sure that the guidance office is where you go for a schedule change as "talking") and he asked who was bothering me. I told him, and he never bothered me again. He did say something about the teacher threatening to call the cops... Now that's a tactic that I can get behind.
Sure, the bully will want to pass it on, but if he is removed from class to be questioned about a harassment case (if that is indeed what may have come of it) then that shows that their behavior is not to be tolerated.
It's one thing to be ignored, excluded, or otherwise socially snubbed, but harassment is a criminal offense. Only the worst thugs with an already sizable rap sheet would take that lightly. I think that zero-tolerance policies are the answer.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 9:36 pm
I think its the parents duty to keep their kids in line.
Raise them right & there wouldn't be any bullies.
That or they need to get more involved with their kids.
I mean.. if you cant tell that they are so depressed to the point of suicide.. then you need to start paying attention a little more.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 11:00 pm
Lady Kira X I think its the parents duty to keep their kids in line. Raise them right & there wouldn't be any bullies. That or they need to get more involved with their kids. I mean.. if you cant tell that they are so depressed to the point of suicide.. then you need to start paying attention a little more. I am in agreement with tinuviel_nyx and matasoga on this. Family support and a zero tolerance policy on the behavior would help a great deal. The thing with raising the kids the right way is well. which way is the right way exactly? Also there are children who I have known personally who had wonderful parents and still were bullies in the end. Its true that this isnt new behavior bullying as well as parents not taking an interesting in their childs lives. parents should know their children well enough to know if something is bothering them. However it isnt always the case. my own parents had absolutely no clue about how badly I was treated by my peers and that didnt help my relationship with them. I think sometimes its a case of not telling the parents as well. I certainly didnt.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Oct 12, 2010 11:20 pm
When I say the right way..
I meant more like..
teaching your kids that just because someones different doesn'nt mean you can make fun of them.
Learn to accept people for the way they are.. good or bad.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Oct 13, 2010 8:55 am
Lady Kira X When I say the right way..
I meant more like..
teaching your kids that just because someones different doesn'nt mean you can make fun of them.
Learn to accept people for the way they are.. good or bad. So this means that you're a proponent of "educating" the bully? That once they know it's wrong, once they understand this concept that what they're doing isn't the moral thing to do, then they will immediately begin to remedy their behavior? This will not help. Not one bit. Even if the very cornerstone of their parenting strategy is acceptance, even if that was embraced by the child to the utmost, even if that in that was one of the things that he believed most, in the moment when they see other children being ostracized, verbally abused, possibly even assaulted, (or is it not called "assault" in cases of minor on minor violence?) in that moment when they know that the other kids don't feel the same, in that moment when they see very clearly that there is one of two types of people they can be, what difference is upbringing going to make? Not to go totally Lord of the Flies on you, here, but teachers can't be everywhere. Social survival is a factor.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 2:17 am
Matasoga Lady Kira X When I say the right way..
I meant more like..
teaching your kids that just because someones different doesn'nt mean you can make fun of them.
Learn to accept people for the way they are.. good or bad. So this means that you're a proponent of "educating" the bully? That once they know it's wrong, once they understand this concept that what they're doing isn't the moral thing to do, then they will immediately begin to remedy their behavior? This will not help. Not one bit. Even if the very cornerstone of their parenting strategy is acceptance, even if that was embraced by the child to the utmost, even if that in that was one of the things that he believed most, in the moment when they see other children being ostracized, verbally abused, possibly even assaulted, (or is it not called "assault" in cases of minor on minor violence?) in that moment when they know that the other kids don't feel the same, in that moment when they see very clearly that there is one of two types of people they can be, what difference is upbringing going to make? Not to go totally Lord of the Flies on you, here, but teachers can't be everywhere. Social survival is a factor. well if you teach it at a young age.. they wont bully in the first place.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 2:26 am
Lady Kira X well if you teach it at a young age.. they wont bully in the first place. You didn't really address the points that I made, including answering the question if not knowing the immorality factor would really prevent it. Nor did you touch upon the peer pressure aspect... Nor much else that I said, honestly.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Oct 14, 2010 2:28 am
Matasoga Lady Kira X well if you teach it at a young age.. they wont bully in the first place. You didn't really address the points that I made, including answering the question if not knowing the immorality factor would really prevent it. Nor did you touch upon the peer pressure aspect... Nor much else that I said, honestly. I will when Im fully awake.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Mar 04, 2011 5:46 am
It's the Little Things That Count...
Bullying happens in almost every school- it happens to almost everyone when their young.
Is it truly preventable? Kids are cruel, they don't know how to act and usually speak without thinking or even caring what the effect will be.
¤Be Careful What You Say...¤
Since bullying is so common and has always been something children have had to put up with, I usually don't get too worked up about it.
Unless, the bullying is serious. If you commit suicide becasue a few kids call you names..then that's your own decesion.
But if you stuff students in lockers, shove little kids around and literally do whatever you can to torment one kid- you need help. If you spread horrible rumors, play cruel jokes, steal friends, and go out of your way to make sure that one person is completely on their own- your need help too.
I don't think that going to court and jail is exactly the first move that should be taken towards bullying.
I think that the bully should be helped with their insecurity issues and taught properly that what their doing is wrong.
I also think that parents should be confronted- if the bully's parent isn't willing to correct their child then both the parent and child need to be straightened out.
Around Her Delicate Ears...The Strong Are Always Weaker Than You Expect.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
