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 Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 5:11 pm
To me, College seems over hyped, waste of my time, garbage that makes me feel I'm wasting more of my life and missing out on experiences that would better help me in life. Why is this? Is it just not for me? Is it too easy? Too Hard? Am I obnoxious? Am I Ignorant? Why did my academic work ethic took a s**t after I graduated from High School? Did I really believe it was over? Do I feel I no longer need to care for that particular area anymore?
You know, College would be a hell of a lot easier if I knew what I wanted to do. Received scholarships or valuable grants. But sense I lack both of those two important qualities, all I'm doing is unnecessary things and adding stress to the pile. It's not my job! Because my hours are solid, my work days are solid too and I get more days off from it than most people do. Yea for working at a school! Back to College related. Do I lack motivation or support from others? Is it the economy and no hope for the future doing this? Why do I have no goals in life? How come I don't fear being only a Middle Class or even a Under Class citizen? Is it my current living situation to blame for all this mess?
How come I look behind and not forward so much? Why do I revisit the good old times when I thought life was complex and difficult? Why do I feel everyone is disappearing right before my eyes and yet they are still there? Is there any other way I can live a great life with a killer job without tending College and being in debt for 20-30 years of my life? I get pointed to the military. For a long time, it sounded like a bad idea, that I felt if I went in, the stress of the job would make me snap and drive me to suicide. How come it is starting to sound better and better to just join some form of military? I gain great experience, save a lot of money and get provided most of the needed things, why not? Is it the possibility of me feeling guilty that I'm leeching off society's taxes?
And what's up with me yearning companionship? Before I graduated High School, I was believing life on my own and alone would be the way to go. Why do I feel different about this? Do I believe finding someone I can love outside of my family will help me feel better about myself? When will all these questions of mine be answered? Why do I have so many!?
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Why did I post here? To put quite simple, I have been suffering from Post Traumatic Stress sense the 3rd grade. It was at its worse only two and a half weeks ago after I hanged out with two happy couples giving affection to one another. It was a stab to the silent heart I had for so long. I heard voices that night and I told myself, "If I don't talk to someone. I know I'm going to kill myself". I finally declared myself over it only a week ago. But I still have relapsing symptoms, all I wrote above is a example of it.
I was hoping someone could read and talk to me about all this stuff and make me feel better, somehow, someway.
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 8:40 pm
College is definitely not a waste of time or money.
College graduates make more, on average, than people with no college. I had a tutoring job after college. I made $13.50 an hour to start. Another girl was still in college and made $7.50 to start. That was the difference that a degree made for doing the exact same job at that place. And she was actually a hell of a lot better at it than I was too.
Not to mention all of the neat stuff you learn. High school is often a lot of useless memorization, but college gives you more chances to learn real stuff that you're actually interested in and can apply to life or your job.
Don't worry about not knowing what you want to do for a career yet. Most people switch majors at least once. I did. And even then I still didn't end up working in the direct field that my degree was in, but my degree helped me get the job. My father always said, "It doesn't matter what you get your degree in. Get it in basket weaving for all anyone cares. Employers just want to see that you took the initiative to get something and that you have the ability to learn." That's a bit of an exaggeration, but he's not entirely wrong either. College does look good on a resume.
You can also talk to someone at the school about scholarships, grants, and financial aid if you haven't already. There may be some options that you're not even aware of. I didn't apply for anything until my third semester because I didn't really know my options. Then I found out I could have been saving a lot of money the whole time.
I don't recommend the military. A lot of people die in it. Others end up permanently disabled. Free college is nice and all, but it's not exactly something I am willing to risk my life for either.
The military is also very controversial. Some people hate the military and won't hire anyone who had been in it. Others don't hate the military, but they may be hesitant to hire someone fresh out of it because a lot of people come out of it with mental health issues due to all the horror that they see. Others may be hesitant to hire people in the military because a lot of kids go in the military when they have no clue what they want to do, so they may see the military as something that kids do to putter around after high school, sort of like backpacking in Europe. They may see it as something not entirely respectable, not a good use of time.
So a military background may turn some employers on. But it may turn others off. It's a gamble. And that's even assuming that you make it out of there well enough to look for a job after. But college is pretty much always an employer turn on.
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 8:42 pm
Your first 2 paragraphs sound like they came right from my boyfriend's mouth. ninja
Have you done any college so far?
And I know it sounds cliche, but have you talked to a counsellor or therapist about any of these things? Have you been on any medication for depression before?
Edit: To second what Lorien said, if you can afford it, college is not a waste of time or money.
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 10:07 pm
Nikolita Your first 2 paragraphs sound like they came right from my boyfriend's mouth. ninja Have you done any college so far? And I know it sounds cliche, but have you talked to a counsellor or therapist about any of these things? Have you been on any medication for depression before? Edit: To second what Lorien said, if you can afford it, college is not a waste of time or money. I'm doing College right now and it blows and the only lame part of my life, besides being single. But single is ok, because I refuse to one day further poison the already diminishing gene pool. I don't like to take drugs, so I just have to sit through it and deal with it. Coping with it the hard way makes me feel more accomplished anyways. Sometimes though, I fee like I need to just jump out of my body, it's a odd feeling.
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 10:34 pm
Valgex Nikolita Your first 2 paragraphs sound like they came right from my boyfriend's mouth. ninja Have you done any college so far? And I know it sounds cliche, but have you talked to a counsellor or therapist about any of these things? Have you been on any medication for depression before? Edit: To second what Lorien said, if you can afford it, college is not a waste of time or money. I'm doing College right now and it blows and the only lame part of my life, besides being single. But single is ok, because I refuse to one day further poison the already diminishing gene pool. I don't like to take drugs, so I just have to sit through it and deal with it. Coping with it the hard way makes me feel more accomplished anyways. Sometimes though, I fee like I need to just jump out of my body, it's a odd feeling. Hmm... could it be because you don't like what you're being taught? Or you just don't like the idea of college in itself? Would you prefer learning something more hands-on, like a trade? Ah ok. smile Yeah I hear you on that. I don't like taking meds either, but the only reason I'm on them now is because I felt I have to be. My brain chemical levels were getting messed up without being on anything, so now I'm more stabilized and can focus on the things I need to focus on. But that's just me of course.
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Posted: Mon Sep 27, 2010 10:41 pm
Nikolita Valgex Nikolita Your first 2 paragraphs sound like they came right from my boyfriend's mouth. ninja Have you done any college so far? And I know it sounds cliche, but have you talked to a counsellor or therapist about any of these things? Have you been on any medication for depression before? Edit: To second what Lorien said, if you can afford it, college is not a waste of time or money. I'm doing College right now and it blows and the only lame part of my life, besides being single. But single is ok, because I refuse to one day further poison the already diminishing gene pool. I don't like to take drugs, so I just have to sit through it and deal with it. Coping with it the hard way makes me feel more accomplished anyways. Sometimes though, I fee like I need to just jump out of my body, it's a odd feeling. Hmm... could it be because you don't like what you're being taught? Or you just don't like the idea of college in itself? Would you prefer learning something more hands-on, like a trade? Ah ok. smile Yeah I hear you on that. I don't like taking meds either, but the only reason I'm on them now is because I felt I have to be. My brain chemical levels were getting messed up without being on anything, so now I'm more stabilized and can focus on the things I need to focus on. But that's just me of course. Yeah, trade would be good. But without a Goal, that is pointless as well. Or not knowing what I want to do as well.
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2010 1:07 am
Yep, my boyfriend's dealing with the same issue right now. Doesn't want to go back to school until he knows what he wants to do with himself, but he lacks the education to qualify for certain types of training or programs. And until he knows what he wants to do, he won't spend money to upgrade himself... vicious cycle.
I'm not sure what to suggest, because I'm still stuck in the same situation (as an observer).
Is there a way you could arrange some "mini-apprenticeships" with jobs around town that you think you might be interested in? Where you'd volunteer for a day to experience the position and not get paid? That might give you a sampling of what's available and what you might like/not like.
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2010 7:30 am
Nikolita Yep, my boyfriend's dealing with the same issue right now. Doesn't want to go back to school until he knows what he wants to do with himself, but he lacks the education to qualify for certain types of training or programs. And until he knows what he wants to do, he won't spend money to upgrade himself... vicious cycle. I'm not sure what to suggest, because I'm still stuck in the same situation (as an observer). Is there a way you could arrange some "mini-apprenticeships" with jobs around town that you think you might be interested in? Where you'd volunteer for a day to experience the position and not get paid? That might give you a sampling of what's available and what you might like/not like.
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2010 9:22 am
Valgex Nikolita Yep, my boyfriend's dealing with the same issue right now. Doesn't want to go back to school until he knows what he wants to do with himself, but he lacks the education to qualify for certain types of training or programs. And until he knows what he wants to do, he won't spend money to upgrade himself... vicious cycle. I'm not sure what to suggest, because I'm still stuck in the same situation (as an observer). Is there a way you could arrange some "mini-apprenticeships" with jobs around town that you think you might be interested in? Where you'd volunteer for a day to experience the position and not get paid? That might give you a sampling of what's available and what you might like/not like. I'd have to move out of town for that to be honest. I live in a small, rural sort of area. There are not many Trade business that are of any interest to me. Then there's a goal for you. wink
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Posted: Tue Sep 28, 2010 9:44 pm
Nikolita Valgex Nikolita Yep, my boyfriend's dealing with the same issue right now. Doesn't want to go back to school until he knows what he wants to do with himself, but he lacks the education to qualify for certain types of training or programs. And until he knows what he wants to do, he won't spend money to upgrade himself... vicious cycle. I'm not sure what to suggest, because I'm still stuck in the same situation (as an observer). Is there a way you could arrange some "mini-apprenticeships" with jobs around town that you think you might be interested in? Where you'd volunteer for a day to experience the position and not get paid? That might give you a sampling of what's available and what you might like/not like. I'd have to move out of town for that to be honest. I live in a small, rural sort of area. There are not many Trade business that are of any interest to me. Then there's a goal for you. wink
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Posted: Wed Sep 29, 2010 12:40 am
LoL, it's all about how you look at life. blaugh If you're going to be pessimistic, then yeah things are going to look negative because that's how you're skewing them all the time.
You could try listing the pros and cons of each goal or decision you come up with. For example, moving out of town to a bigger city.
Pros:
- Meeting new people.
- Networking with people and organizations that could help you decide what to do with your life.
- Having new experiences, things you can't experience where you live now.
- Doing things you've never done before.
- Access to more resources and potentially more job opportunities.
Cons:
- Can be hard to adjust after living/growing up in a smaller town.
- Can be lonely if you're by yourself and/or having a hard time meeting new people.
- Certain new experiences can be intimidating.
- Can be expensive if you're relying on yourself.
- Might be hard to get work.
So everything has pros and cons, and it's up to you to weigh what you feel is important and of value to you. If you are worried about making ends meet and finding work in a new city, you might choose to stay where you are now, and there's nothing wrong with that. Or if you value meeting new people and having new experiences, you may opt to move elsewhere for a change of pace. Both options are ok.
My boyfriend grew up in small towns, and when we first met and started dating, living in the big city where I was was his first time living in a large city. He had new experiences like taking public transit to get around, and meeting lots of new people around town. As of now, he still prefers smaller towns, so if we move elsewhere once I graduate from university, we'll have to find a compromise between a large and small town.
Something else that doesn't get mentioned often is that not everything in life requires a degree. Depending on your point of view on life, many people will tell you that the better jobs require post-secondary experience, while others in different fields will tell you it's possible to be successful in a manual labor job or in a field that doesn't necessarily require a degree, or a lot of post-secondary school. It's just up to you to find what that job/career is. Even trades require just a GED I think (at least where I live they do), so if you've been in college already, you might meet the requirements to enter a trade if you find one that interests you.
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Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2010 4:09 pm
Nikolita LoL, it's all about how you look at life. blaugh If you're going to be pessimistic, then yeah things are going to look negative because that's how you're skewing them all the time. You could try listing the pros and cons of each goal or decision you come up with. For example, moving out of town to a bigger city. Pros: - Meeting new people. - Networking with people and organizations that could help you decide what to do with your life. - Having new experiences, things you can't experience where you live now. - Doing things you've never done before. - Access to more resources and potentially more job opportunities. Cons: - Can be hard to adjust after living/growing up in a smaller town. - Can be lonely if you're by yourself and/or having a hard time meeting new people. - Certain new experiences can be intimidating. - Can be expensive if you're relying on yourself. - Might be hard to get work. So everything has pros and cons, and it's up to you to weigh what you feel is important and of value to you. If you are worried about making ends meet and finding work in a new city, you might choose to stay where you are now, and there's nothing wrong with that. Or if you value meeting new people and having new experiences, you may opt to move elsewhere for a change of pace. Both options are ok. My boyfriend grew up in small towns, and when we first met and started dating, living in the big city where I was was his first time living in a large city. He had new experiences like taking public transit to get around, and meeting lots of new people around town. As of now, he still prefers smaller towns, so if we move elsewhere once I graduate from university, we'll have to find a compromise between a large and small town. Something else that doesn't get mentioned often is that not everything in life requires a degree. Depending on your point of view on life, many people will tell you that the better jobs require post-secondary experience, while others in different fields will tell you it's possible to be successful in a manual labor job or in a field that doesn't necessarily require a degree, or a lot of post-secondary school. It's just up to you to find what that job/career is. Even trades require just a GED I think (at least where I live they do), so if you've been in college already, you might meet the requirements to enter a trade if you find one that interests you.
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Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2010 10:44 pm
Have you tried talking to an academic advisor, to get ideas for career/job goals in your future? Or even just to help figure out what you might like/dislike as a job?
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Posted: Thu Sep 30, 2010 10:48 pm
Nikolita Have you tried talking to an academic advisor, to get ideas for career/job goals in your future? Or even just to help figure out what you might like/dislike as a job?
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Posted: Fri Oct 01, 2010 7:23 am
Valgex Nikolita Have you tried talking to an academic advisor, to get ideas for career/job goals in your future? Or even just to help figure out what you might like/dislike as a job? Last time I did that. I thought they were going to kill themselves cause of how my depression was rubbing onto them. LOL Hmmm. So then maybe dealing with your depression is the key to getting other possibilities to open up for you?
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