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 Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 8:12 pm
VOX trilogy
chapter 1 (I have 4 so far)
Tuesday was always Tohico's favorite day. But today everything went wrong.
It started when he was pushed to the ground by the new kid Farin. He had red spiked hair and something was weird about his eyes, they looked like cat eyes, glowing red! Everybody laughed and pointed at Tohico. Tohico looked up at Farin and saw that he had a smug look on his face. Farin was 18 and a bully. Farin and his left, and that was when he heard the tardy bell. Tohico got up and cursed to himself while running to class. When he got to class everybody laughed until the teacher yelled at them, then they all fell silent. Then the teacher told him to sit down and stay after school for being tardy.
Everything happened all at once. It felt like Farin wanted to make his life completly miserable. He was just getting done and the teacher left, that was when he heard the fire alarm. He raced to the door, but when he touched the doorknob, it was super hot! He got burned and yelped. He turned around and tried to open the windows to try and climb out. But they were locked tight. He was trapped! That was when smoke started to fill the room. He looked around for the source. The desk was on fire! He could have sworn it was perfectly fine befor he touched the door. He started to then panic. A whole ton of smoke was coming in the room. He started to cough and looked out the window. His eyes opened wide. The whole front of school was on fire and there were a whole ton of fire trucks and firemen trying to put it out. But everytime they tried to hose it down, they just made it worse! That was when he saw a shadowy figure looking at him outside the school in the front. It was Farin. Except he wasn't on fire!
The last thing he saw was the door being kicked down and two girls that were dressed up as a half cat and half human. He saw them racing to him and that was when he fell unconcious.
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Posted: Mon Jan 02, 2006 3:59 am
So far I like it. Though with out more of the stroy, it's hard to give a good oppinion about publication. Though I would say go for it.
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Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 12:19 pm
Fairly....bizarre, But I'm liking it so far. MORE!!
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Posted: Tue Jan 03, 2006 3:52 pm
((All right, more it is. Here comes chapter 2!))
chapter 2
Do you think he's okay?" A high pitched girl voice asked.
"He'll be fine, now be quiet!" A calm voice answered.
"Are you sure Kiera?" The active one asked.
"yes Chi-Chi!, I checked his pulse and he's fine, so stop worrying!"
"But it's been a day since Farin set that building on fire!" Chi-Chi shrieked. That was when Tohico woke up and flew up in a sitting position. Around him were the girls in the costumes and he was on a fluffy bed and he saw steel walls surrounding him. There was a steel table, refrigerator, oven, and something that looked like a microwave.
"Well now, look who's back from the dead. Take it easy and lay down, you're still recovering." Kiera told him. Tohico was restless and wouldn't lay down, he had too many uestions to ask, so he started with the obvious.
"Who and what are you?"
"I am Kiera and this is my sister, she is the lively one, her name is Chi-Chi. For what we are? I can't tell you until we reach our destination, there are too many ears where we are."
"where am I" Tohico asked.
" We are on the healing planet for all species and planets!>" Chi-Chi answered. Tohico's ears popped on that answer.
"A planet?!" That's impossible, there can't be life on other planets!"
This time Kiera answered him.
"Maybe not in your galaxy, but there is in others that your planet hasn't discovered yet."
"How many galaxies are there?" Both Kiera and Chi-Chi shrugged. "oh." After that everyone was silent for a moment. Then Kiera broke the silence.
"Since you have so much energy to ask questions, we will continue on to our destination.Oh one thing, what is your...name?"
"Tohico."
"Oh! What a cute name!"Chi-Chi said. Kiera just rolled her eyes and then saw that Tohico fainted with so much info. in him from putting a translator in him, which, she forgot to tell him.
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Posted: Thu Jan 05, 2006 10:19 am
Well done for drawing the reader in. hmmm, you may need to work on this abit more, but still, I'd like to read more.
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Posted: Sat Jan 07, 2006 8:51 pm
Chapter 3
Tohico woke up and found that he was in a new room, and saw it was his own room. It must have been a dream, he thought to himself and relaxed. Then he looked on the floor and saw there was no carpet! When he blinked, a carpet was there! He tried to sove off the idea and go back to sleep. He looked again and noticed something wrong with it. It looked likeripples and was all fuzzy! He then realized everything that had happened was real and not just a dream. Then everything went pitch black and the door opened. Out came the two cat girls, only this time someone new was with them, He looked similisr like them except that he had wings and a different looking tail.
"What just happened Kiera?" He asked.
"We were making sure you didn't think it was a dream. We are going to tell you what is going on, we had to make sure you weren't thinking that you were going mad! Plus, we didn't want you to tell people about what we will tell you, and that wouldn't be good when a VOX is roaming around freely on your planet! Kiera answered.
"What the heck is a VOX?" Tohico asked.
This time the other guy answered. "A VOX is a 'fire user' who tries to destroy their enemies. They also can change into any form. In this case, a fire user has changed into a teenage bully called Farin on your planet. Am I correct?"
"So Farin set the school on fire? But why... And how do you know? Tohico asked.
"Yes, we don't know why, but I heard him talking about it and decided to have you stay after to make sure nothing would happen to you, but when I left I realized that you were locked in and decided to get Kiera and Chi-Chi.
"wait... you're Mr. Sharok?!" Tohico practically screamed.
"Actually, Sharok is my first name and that was just my disguise, I don't have much expierence to be a teacher...so I don't know if I did anything right!" He chuckled and then coughed. "Well your here because we are trying to figure out what Farin wants with you. Fortunatly we are seeing an observer/gypsy if there is something special about you that we don't know about. In addition though, we have to go to the neighboring planet, Ison" "nasty little planet."He mumbled under his breath. Luckily no one heard him.
They got into some weird car and flew to their destination.
(I'm still working on chapter 4. I don't know what power Tohico should have though, that is where I'm stuck. stressed )
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Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 11:41 am
Maybe, since farin is a fire user, Tohico can be a water user, to put farin out!! 3nodding
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Posted: Sun Jan 08, 2006 3:14 pm
hmm, yeah! that's great! Now I need more characters and maybe some villains!*cackels* twisted
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Posted: Tue Jan 31, 2006 2:04 pm
This story is still alive and open for more new ideas, and you can make up your own world!
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Posted: Sat Feb 04, 2006 5:51 pm
all alone crying . I have a writers block, and I just started chapter 4, need more ideas
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Posted: Tue Feb 07, 2006 5:49 pm
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Posted: Sat Feb 11, 2006 10:13 am
need opinions, writers block!
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