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 Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 3:16 am
A lot of stuff has happened to me in the last 10 months, and I really don't want to repeat stuff in this thread I have said in others so I will limit it. The one thing that just made me happy ... the one thing I could turn to. my girlfriend was a fake... I knew from the get go that I didn't feel right about a long distance/Internet relationship type thing. There is some more to it than that, the person who I trusted, the person who was "Helping me" deal with things like the loss of friends and my Mother and grandmother and I was honestly down and out for a while. Well, somehow in her mind, she had the idea to "Cheer me up" by creating a person who would be nothing but uplifting for me. Made me happy, had great conversations, and I even said I loved her, I was led on for months by a person who I trusted so much and look what happened.
Needless to say that this all adding up has hurt me, a lot, and has put me down like nothing else. Making me frustrated, randomly angry, randomly depressed and just... out
I know that techniques vary from person to person, and I know ultimately it is up to me, but I am curious as to how others deal with lows. I honestly have never felt more stupid in my life, and I would love nothing more than to find a place to start.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 9:55 am
I am sorry to hear that.
You're a trusting person with a lot of love to give. There is nothing to feel stupid about in that. And we all get fooled from time to time. So you're not any more stupid than anyone else.
I tend to look on the bright side. You probably should too.
Sure, this one didn't work out, but that's ok. If nothing else, it gave you a taste of what could be, and what will be when you meet someone real. So imagine how good it will feel when it's real and with the right person!
If she doesn't want to pursue it it's her loss. You can meet someone more deserving in the future.
Until then, just try to keep your chin up, stay active, make friends, and have fun. A good partner will often fall into your lap when you're hardly looking!
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 3:14 pm
Thanks Lorien. I have tried looking at the bright side, and honestly the bright side I often come to is what you mentioned. I got a taste of what it could be like, and it felt great for the time being. Though I usually reset myself down after I remember that the first time I said that I loved somebody she was nothing more than a person who does not exist. As for a good partner falling right in my lap when I am hardly looking, I wish that I could say that it may happen, but it is just something that is a bit tricky to look forward to I suppose.
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 10:00 pm
You could try to keep yourself distracted with positive things that will make you feel better? ninja
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Posted: Mon Jan 25, 2010 10:14 pm
Nikolita You could try to keep yourself distracted with positive things that will make you feel better? ninja I have tried EDIT: sorry, yeah... I have been trying, and it works until I stop and it comes back. It just weighs on me every time my mind is not occupied.
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:05 am
I know exactly what you are going through i went through it with a girl for 4 years, i had even purposed and she had said yes but she was fake to a whole new level when she finally showed her true colors, it hurt, i locked myself away for months, but i had friends to help me through it, even help me plot revenge.
All you really need is friends by your side that will talk about it with you and help you get over it. it took me almost 3 years to fully get over it but with friends it helped things go easier and it also helps to try finding someone to fill that void, I did
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:26 am
Thanks, friends by my side have helped thus far. Though the situation is a bit different I would imagine, you at least knew her. The person who claimed to love me was fake, did not exist a creation of a person who for whatever reason decided to mess with me. As for your second point, even if it was an option, I am not a person for revenge, somebody wants to mess with me on such a level They don't even deserve the time of my day.
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 4:01 am
you are welcome and if you want i will be one of your friends to help you through this
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 4:37 am
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 10:49 am
Sauvie The person who claimed to love me was fake, did not exist a creation of a person who for whatever reason decided to mess with me. It sounds like the person created this girlfriend character to cheer you up and make you feel loved? Even if their project failed miserably and wasn't the brightest idea to begin with, it sounds like they did have good intentions. And if they put that much time into trying to cheer you up, then they do care about you, even if it isn't in a romantic way.
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Posted: Tue Jan 26, 2010 3:34 pm
LorienLlewellyn Sauvie The person who claimed to love me was fake, did not exist a creation of a person who for whatever reason decided to mess with me. It sounds like the person created this girlfriend character to cheer you up and make you feel loved? Even if their project failed miserably and wasn't the brightest idea to begin with, it sounds like they did have good intentions. And if they put that much time into trying to cheer you up, then they do care about you, even if it isn't in a romantic way. That is possible, and I have thought about that, I mean, she talked me down without the guise of my girlfriend countless times, made me feel better, made me see things from my perspective instead of just trying to care for everyone (long story short on that one, cutting contact with a friend who treated me like garbage). I mean, I keep trying to look at it as if it was all just a way to help, but the way it ended just screams two things, cutting contact means either boredom of this little joke that she had on me, or that maybe she could not bear to continue. Unfortunately, with some of the stories she had come up with while we talked, I always steer on the side of it being bad intentions from the start.
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