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 Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:50 pm
 Quote: We need to do Irene and Ellery as the US-Canada twins if we do them in LOTUS ):< BECAUSE THOSE COUNTRIES SO ARE TWINS?? THEY CAN HAVE LIVED IN, LIKE, SEATTLE AND VANCOUVER. THAT IS LIKE A THREE HOUR DRIVE. THEY VISITED EACH OTHER ON WEEKENDS AND HAPPENED TO BE VISITING EACH OTHER WHEN TIME WENT "PING I AM BROKEN" SO THEY WENT TO LOTUS TOGETHER. COME ON. IT COULD EVEN HAVE BEEN A RECENTISH MOVE. i think this is a good idea (i've only had, like, a six-pack of winecoolers. <--disclaimer)
Kota does not have this excuse
Name: Irene Alycone Smith
Gender: Female
Age: 22
Nationality: American
Reason(s) for joining LOTUS: Your mainframe? Is a piece of crap. Seriously. You need someone to fix that. It's this port, here, that's the problem-- No, that's not better-- Goddamn it, just let me do it. ********. I need a smoke.
Pertinent skills: Well, I can make a decent firewall at the least. ********, what is your IT guy-- you don't have an IT guy?
What do you mean physically? Mom put me through ballet and taekwondo, okay, leave me alone so I can fix this. ********. No IT guy? Really?
...Go the hell away before I put my cigarette out in your eye.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:51 pm
 Quote: LONG LONG AGO IN A GALAXY** FAR AWAY ZIGE AND KOTA WERE BEING AMERICAN CITIZENS this involves being rascally scamps and watching fireworks on the fourth of july and, in kota's case, really diggin' alexander hamilton, or in zige's case, bayonetting archer cos he's a filthy redcoat. however, zige and kota decided that it wasn't enough to just be american by themselves, and thus decided that they also wanted american lotus agents. and what better than twin lotus agents? an agent you know may be a bro but when an agent's your bro, they're a bro fo sho. if that made no sense to you, it didn't make sense to me either. anyway, we planned irene and ellery to both be american, then zige got drunk and said she wanted canada too, to which i said 'OSSUM ellery is not manly enough to be american anyway and i do like maple syrup and lumberjacks and beavers and friendliness' thus, zige and kota's quest for north america was spawned. **The Zigenkota Nebula, in fact, in Orion's belt.
drunk on america.Name Ellery Altair Smith Gender Male Age 22 Nationality Canadian Reasons for joining LOTUS Dude, Irene said so. Plus you guys can fund us and s**t, right? Because, uh, I have a few writeoff expenses to go through, too. Just let me grab the list. Pertinent skills Um, I'm sort of a techonological wunderkind, and if you haven't noticed, you sort of need one. None of your agents know jack s**t about computers, need I mention the chicken lady? Fighting skills? Well, yeah, I'm a man, I can beat people up. I can, like, crash their modems or send them links to porn sites that won't close when you click on it. Oh, you mean with fists? Well, I can do it, but Irene, uh, likes to. Yeah, I don't want Irene to be unhappy. Yeahhhhh.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:52 pm
 Name Irene Alycone Smith
Age 22
Gender Female
Nationality American
Occupation Software engineer (Google, bitches; 95k a year.)
Education Bachelors of Science from Seattle University (majored in Computer Science and Software Engineering, graduated suma c** laude with a minor in philosophy)
Virtues
Independent- Give her a task, and Irene is on it. She doesn't require anyone around her to have fun, and she doesn't require it to work, either. She is a great self-motivator, telling herself "once you're done with x, you can go have another cigarette" or "when x error is fixed, you can work on a new program". Irene believes that she is capable, that there is nothing she cannot do.
Perfectionist- She will give you the best damn program you've ever seen. Her appearance will always be absolutely perfect. She will not burn dinner, she will not forget to clean her room, her bed will be made. Creases in her pants will be straight, not crooked. There will be no--you've got the idea, right?
Dedicated- She starts it, she finishes it, in record time. If it's not what you wanted the first time, she will go back to it and rehash it as often as you like, until you have what you want. She will not skip steps to make things faster--you ask for something, you know you'll get it on her schedule, but you will get it and it will work exceptionally well.
Generous- Not exactly kind, but Irene thinks nothing of giving you her last smoke, or helping you out with that computer problem (dear lord, it's ellery's again, I told you not to click on links from him). She'll set aside what she's doing and help you out, just let her get to this stopping point.
Flaws
Independent- Irene does not need you. She doesn't want you, she won't mollycoddle you to keep you near her, she would sooner die than beg you to hang out with her. But sometimes she does need other people to help her bring ideas to fruition, and if it's not her twin she will be bitchy about it.
Perfectionist- If it's not perfect, she won't give it to you. It doesn't matter how much you need it, even just the skeleton of it, you will not get it until she's done. And if you try and get it before then, she will delete your files. She will run a magnet over your hard drive and bite you. That is not yours. It is hers until she is done with it.
Tunnel Vision- She can only see The Goal. Sure, she'll stop and help you iron your clothes, but rest assured the whole time Irene is thinking: The less time Archer Wells spends doing his laundry, the more time is spent bringing down Janus. Or, The more chickens I catch, the less time it takes for Estrelas to do whatever the hell it is Estrelas does--and bringing down Janus. Or, The less time I spend bitching at Wraith about how Nerds Rope is not a business expense, the more time he spends making out with his paperwork--and bringing down Janus.
We all make sacrifices.
Pride- Irene is the best. Ergo, everything she does is the best. She is incapable of screwing things up, she is always the best at everything. Everything. There is no one better than her, except maybe her twin. And that's only at spending half his life cracked out on sugar. Ffff. BEING THE BEST MEANS NEVER HAVING TO SAY YOU'RE SORRY
Vices
Cigarettes- Irene picked up smoking at sixteen and hasn't looked back since the first lung-searing go. It is relaxing. It helps her overcome her compulsions. She is not a social smoker, she does it when she's alone--other people's smoke makes her itchy, and then she has to go spend twenty minutes washing her hands. And she will take two showers to get the smell of not-her-smoke out of her hair. It's not incorrect to say that Irene requires cigarettes to work at her top capacity--it "helps her think".
Computers- Irene needs them to work, it's true, but even more than that most of her socializing takes place on the internet. It's hard for her to go a day without touching her fingers to the home row keys.
Theme Song "Man" the Bird & the Bee
NOTE
Irene has a mild case of obsessive-compulsive disorder. Her obsession is cleanliness--she has to clean. Her box of wires is possibly the neatest, most untangled seen in the world, past present or future. Her clothes are always perfectly color coordinated, her possessions arranged by size (small things to the left, large to the right, in size order), she will tap the topmost left corner of a door frame, she will compulsively check windows to make sure they're locked, she has to be clean. Also, she will never feel at ease in a room until she's smoked in it. Like a cat, or something.
Moving her things will get her weepy, and then it will get her pissed off. That's why no one who knows her does it, unless they don't like her. Interns were the bane of her existence in the cubicle farm.
Things that make her feel unclean:
Other people's cigarette smoke
Sizzling noises
Actually being unclean
Sea spray
etc.
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:55 pm
 ELLERY ALTAIR SMITH, EH?
Name Ellery Altair Smith
Age 22
Gender Male
Nationality Canadian
Occupation Software engineer (Vista is all his fault. He knows it. He did it specifically to annoy people.)
Education Graduate degree in Software Systems from the University of British Columbia, certificate degree in Inventive Engineering from the Newton School of Alternative Education
Virtues
Flexible
Creative
Sociable
Openminded
Flaws
Lazy
Possessive
Self-Destructive
Cowardly
Vices
Coffee
Sugar-
Sadism-
Theme Song All These Things That I've Done The Killers
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:56 pm
IRENE ALCYONE ********' SMITH
DOES NOT IN FACT OWN A DOLL NAMED SIRIUS
SOCIALIST LIES
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:57 pm
ELLERY ALTAIR SMITH, EH?
THINKS COFFEE DRINKING IS SUCH A COOL VICE
ALL THE BADASSES DRINK COFFEE
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 10:58 pm
 IRENE ALCYONE ********' SMITH
HATES PUPPIES
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Posted: Tue Jan 05, 2010 11:01 pm
 ELLERY ALTAIR SMITH, EH?
DOES NOT HAVE AN UNHEALTHY ADDICTION TO SUGAR
THAT IS A GIRLY VICE
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