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 Posted: Tue Dec 22, 2009 8:03 pm
biggrin I hope you like! It's actually a poem for my Pikachu. <3 Our 14 months is coming up in.. oh wait, it's tomorrow.
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I want to give you a jar,
A jar filled with sweets and happiness.
A jar that will never overflows,
Nor will it ever dry up.
A birthday present,
A Christmas gift.
Which do you prefer?
I want to give you a jar.
A jar filled with sweets and happiness
Made from my own two hands.
So that you'd never ponder about
The depth of my feelings
The thief of my heart.
We take too many things for granted.
The meaning of holding hands and kisses
Is so much more than a relationship beyond friends.
It's the only other way I can show you,
And you, me,
That no one else can replace you.
And so now, I decided
To put all this happiness into a jar
To give it to you, my dear
Sealed. Preserved. Cherished.
So that we can last
As long as we can.
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Posted: Thu Feb 04, 2010 7:49 pm
This poem is absolutely adorable. ^_^ There are a few lines that I'd like to change slightly though... "...The thief of my heart..." I think would be better as "The thief that is my heart". These two lines "...The meaning of holding hands and kisses... Is so much more than a relationship beyond friends." seem like they could be written a little differently so they make more sense. I am not sure how though. The last line that I think would be best altered just slightly is the last line. I personally think that it'd be better as "Now and forever more." Overall this poem is really good. I love the jar concept! Keep up the good work!
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Posted: Tue Feb 09, 2010 6:14 pm
x] Haha, thanks! Well, the reference to the thief of my heart is directed towards the guy actually, which in this case is my boyfriend. x] I'm not quite sure it'll make sense if I refer to my feelings that way.
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