Sex is not supposed to hurt. If you think it is supposed to hurt and if you felt pain, it means you probably did not do your homework before having sex. Doing your homework is the best way to avoid pain every time, even your first time.
While pain during sex is common, it is
not supposed to be there. Pain is generally your body's way of telling you that something is wrong. And sex is no exception. But girls who don't do their homework don't usually know what they're doing wrong and what they're supposed to be doing in order to not have pain. As a result, they often have pain. The girls who do their homework, on the other hand, very rarely have pain.
Pain during sex is usually caused by the woman being too dry, too tense, or not in the mood. That can happen at any time in a woman's life. But it often happens the woman's first time.
Most women have heard the old myth that sex is supposed to hurt the first time. Due to the poor sex education in most schools, most girls don't even know that it's not true! So most girls tense up their first time because they expect it to hurt. And the fact that they tensed up is a large part of what made it hurt!
When a girl is nervous it can also make it harder for her to produce natural lubricant. The v****a is very delicate. When it is too dry, the friction of sex can cause discomfort, pain, and even bleeding! Foreplay or a store-bought lubricant can usually fix that problem. But most people know so little about their own body and have heard so many sex myths that they think the discomfort that they're feeling is normal and unavoidable. So in many cases they don't even
try the foreplay or lubricant!
And after all that the girl often thinks, "See, it did hurt!" and she runs off to tell all her friends that sex does hurt the first time without even realizing that she was simply doing it wrong. And that's how the myth stays alive.
Hopefully you used birth control. If not, you can get Plan B if this happened less than 72 hours ago. Make sure you have birth control for the future as well.
You should start seeing an ob-gyn now if you haven't already. She can give you paps, birth control, information, STD tests, pregnancy tests, and anything else you might need.
You also might want to get a water-based lubricant to use in the future. Being nervous can make you dry, lots of sex can make you dry, you might be dryer at certain times of the month, and some women are just dryer than others.
If you still feel pain when you are relaxed, lubricated, and in the mood, discuss it with your doctor since there are various infections and other issues that can cause pain during sex.
Before having sex again, I'd recommend researching anatomy, pleasure points, lubrication, fertility, and birth control if you haven't already. When you understand your body, you're a lot more likely to enjoy yourself during sex. When you know your stuff, you are also less likely to get pregnant on accident or to get an STD.
There are lots of stickies here with good information, so look around. If you want more, there are a couple of other sex ed guilds with good stickies as well.
http://www.scarleteen.com/ is great, so feel free to really explore that site. My website (www.peachdough.com) has a few articles on this stuff as well.
"In fact, plenty of women of all ages simply assume intercourse is going to be, or has to be, painful or uncomfortable -- some for the first few times, others that it simply always is to some degree. There tends to be more expectation that vaginal entry will be painful than pleasurable, even though vaginal pain is often completely avoidable."
http://www.scarleteen.com/article/pink/from_ow_to_wow_demystifying_painful_intercourse
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