The first one is really charming, but yes, I'd rethink the toner used.
Blobbing it in the center like that is actually very distracting and I don't recall a tone being used in that many areas [[hair, eyes, clothing, environment]] in the same picture before... I may be wrong however.
It seems to distract from the picture without much to break it up. I usually see it one of two ways, the background is toned, or the characters are and there is a stark white background. Contrast is going to be key in a picture like that. It's a good start, but on the next one, try breaking up huge patches of tones with white or black blocks. ^^ It'd look really cute then!
