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 Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 11:49 pm
  It starts with
One thing I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme
To explain in due time
All I know
Time is a valuable thing
Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings
Watch it count down to the end of the day
The clock ticks life away
It's so unreal
Didn't look out below
Watch the time go right out the window
Trying to hold on, but didn't even know
Or wasted it all just to watch you go
I kept everything inside
And even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be
A memory of a time when
I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall to lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter
One thing, I don't know why
It doesn't even matter how hard you try
Keep that in mind I designed this rhyme
To remind myself how
I tried so hard
In spite of the way you were mocking me
Acting like I was part of your property
Remembering all the times you fought with me
I'm surprised
It got so far
Things aren't the way they were before
You wouldn't even recognize me anymore
Not that you knew me back then
But it all comes back to me in the end
You kept everything inside
And even though I tried, it all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be
A memory of a time when
I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall to lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
And for all this
There's only one thing you should know
I've put my trust in you
Pushed as far as I can go
And for all this
There's only one thing you should know
I tried so hard and got so far
But in the end it doesn't even matter
I had to fall to lose it all
But in the end it doesn't even matter
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Posted: Fri Jul 17, 2009 11:55 pm
After everything had happened, both mates gone...her eldest daughter a run away...left as a single mother...it had finally caused her to go numb. She'd left her infant under a tree during the night and simply run away. She'd run until she'd passed out...and awoke to find a rabbit with the same markings as her. While she never questioned how it'd happened, she'd pulled it close and kept going, leaving everything else behind.
Her tear ducts could produce no more moisture as she sat on a rail, the rabbit she'd named Riza nuzzled up to her chest fur. On occasion Riza spoke, but normally she was quiet...giving Saryichu time to think. Though the more she thought of everything...the more she wished she could slam her head into a boulder.
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Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 9:34 pm
Kaewyn had gone off a day ago in search of his mother. He had spent some time away from home in order to explore on his own when she had seemed to find a new mate. He hadn't begrudged her that, wished her the best of happiness actually. He'd been thrilled to find that she was pregnant, but recent circumstances had caused him to rush off to help a friend.
He'd come back to disastrous news and had immediately gone off to find her. He hadn't rested a bit nor had he slacked off as he hunted for her, afraid he might lose her scent.
"Mom, Mom, HEY MOM! Oh, good--Mother, what happened? What's wrong? What happened to Chizu's coat? Wait, that's not.... Where's Chizu? Oh, Mom.."
Kaewyn ran up to her, giving her a nuzzle.
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Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 10:01 pm
Saryichu did not look at her son, even as he nudged her. How could she? Riza burried herself into her side as she sighed and remained silent. She had so many things to answer for...but she could not find the words. Tears began forming as he spoke frantically.
"Everything is wrong and...I have no idea where Chizu is...I have no idea where anybody is...not anymore Kaewyn..."
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Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 10:06 pm
Kaewyn's head reeled. His little half-sister was gone? He knew she wasn't with his nieces. His sister was MISSING? He snuffled around Saryichu, making sure she was unharmed and allowing his mind to digest all that information. He ended by laying down in front of Sary, his nose near her.
He managed to speak gently. "I am here, Mom. Aika is with Phoenix Shelley and your granddaughters. Nixxie and Aya are doing well. They're still at their home, Mom. I can search for Chizu. I found you, didn't I? I can find her, and everything will be fine. You still have your family. Come home, join with Aika. She can take care of you she wants to. I'll find Chizu. We can get through this."
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Posted: Sat Jul 18, 2009 10:20 pm
Saryichu did not look at her son until he lay in front of her. When she finally looked him in the eyes, her own were wet with tears. Her heart had broken so much..by now it was just numb.
"My mate left me Kaewyn...I'm not good enough to have a loving mate...he didn't want me for me...he wanted me for offspring. When he got no boys...he figured me useless and left..."
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Posted: Sun Jul 19, 2009 5:00 am
There was no way Kaewyn could hide the ire that went across his faice for a moment when Saryichu said that. "Then he wasn't a mate, he was worse than a fool for using you like that. He has probably done it before and will do it again. It is not your fault that he hurt you that way. If I find him, I will take care of it. If boys are what make you worthwhile, you have me and you have my brother. Did you know he had returned? He is healthy and well and wants to make amends." Kaewyn didn't know that was true, but he'd take his brother down and make him throw a good show about it if necessary. "I will also find Chizu and bring her back to you. We'll take care of her. Now, stop letting yourself believe those ridiculous lies. You're very much worth the whole landful of love. Chin up, Mom. Everything will turn for the better."
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Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 1:17 pm
Saryichu simply nodded as her son spoke. Her other son would never accept her...but the thought that he was alive and strong made her feel...happy. A smile crossed her lips as she looked at her loving son. "You have always been by my side Kaewyn. You never give up...I doubt you know how." She moved closer and nuzzled his cheek in the way she used to, her heart now, finally, beginning to mend a little. "Never give up your kind heart...I will return with you..as long as Riza can come too." Motions to the rabbit that had coloring matching hers.
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Posted: Sun Jul 26, 2009 1:41 pm
Kaewyn smiled and nodded for his mother, not particularly feeling kind-hearted at the moment. "Of course Riza can come. She appears to have been destined to be with you. Do you need some food before we leave? Water? Anything? Let's notice the good things along the way, like we used to." Anything, whether a necessity or a nice thing to do, anything at all that would help to please his mother and cheer her up.
Anything that would help him to focus on her so he could hide the anger burning inside.
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Posted: Sun Jul 26, 2009 2:01 pm
Saryichu knew before she'd said anything, that her heart beginning to mend could not stop anger from boiling. Her children had suffered so much because she'd let life kick her down. She'd pulled Kaewyn with her. That's not what a Mother should ever do to her baby.
"...No. I don't need anything. Let's just go." With that she stood. She hoped he did not notice she'd lost a large amount of weight. With her depression, she'd had no energy to hunt. Riza would bring her a root or something small but...right now she was making herself waste away slowly.
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Posted: Sun Jul 26, 2009 2:12 pm
Kaewyn had noted the moment he'd seen his mother how small she'd gotten, it wasn't a surprise to him when she stood and it became even more obvious. He purred a bit, rubbing his head against hers in appreciation that she was coming, and in subtle support of her. He suspected she wouldn't be walking quickly, and sure as he was a lion, he'd be pouncing the first unadopted critter he saw to make sure his mother did eat something.
She was his mother, and he was meant to protect her and be with her no matter what. Nothing would ever change that.
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