Have you ever been in love, and then suddenly, out of the blue, the one you were in love with snatched it away? Well, I have. This is for any girl or guy that has been played by love.
I had a boyfriend who was amazing! He was sweet, kind, good looking, smart, funny, outgoing, athletic, and so romantic! He was everything I wanted, and everything I asked for! He would always tell me these sweet things. like; "You're so beautiful." "Let's run away together. I'll always take care of you, forever." "You're more to me than the air I breath, the food I eat, the life I live. You're my everything." it was like a dream that never ended. i was completely in love with him!
Then one day, i saw him with his arm wrapped around another girl's waist, whispering into her ear, laughing and smiling with her. I walked up to him and confronted him. "What are you doing? What is this?" he said "Jeez Haven, get a life. You really think I would fall for you? I just wanted to see how much I could get out of you! You're so pathetic. Guess I didn't get anything good anyways. I dont even see why I wasted my time on you!"
Those words completely broke me. I couldn't hide it. Tears formed in my eyes in front of them. I ran away, trying to hide away from him, from everything. i wanted to end my suffering. i didn't even know pain like that even existed! i could feel it squeezing the very life out of me! Manipulating, changing, creating anger, sadness, hopelessness, and other emotions that have no names inside of me. i thought it the cruelest for of tourture know to man kind.
i shriveled up and a big piece of me died that day, and kept dying. it has never stopped. i hid from the world for months, barely came out of hiding a year later. i haven't truely recovered from it still, but i try to do my best, to cover it up, to let it go, to be normal again. but it's not that easy. something like that can kill you, change you permenantly forever. im starting to get the flow of talking to other guys again, even have a few crushes! and yes, some are here on gaia!
but if this has ever happened to you, i hope you find comfort and redemption. it will always be with you in your heart, and wil never leave you. you will always remember it, sometimes even cry because of it. but you will find love again. i guess it just wasnt meant to be. but stuff like that will make you stronger, make you understand more, and make you believe in things you never believed in before (like unbearable pain for instance). but just remember, there's always hope. there's someone out there for you. You will find love.