JOKES AND RIDDLES Section 1: yo Momma jokes.
Yo mama so stupid, she told me to meet her on the corner of walk and don't walk.
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Yo mama so big, she does hop-scotch like Chicago, LA, New York...
Section 2: Walks Into A Bar jokes.
Man walks into a bar... "DOOOH!!"
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Horse walks into a bar, the bartenders says "Why the long face?"
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Skeleton walks into a bar and orders a Beer and a Mop.
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A man walks into a bar, sits down, then pulls from his pocket a little piano and sits it down. He then pulls a little 8 inch tall man who sits down and starts playing the piano. He goes to town on it doing classical compositions. The bartender walks over looks at it and is amazed. He asks where he found the little guy, to which the customer said he had a magic lamp in his car. The bartender asks if he can try it and the guy agrees and tells him where to find it.
The bartender goes out to the car, finds the lamp, then rubs it and makes a wish for a million bucks. Suddenly a loud noise comes from above and a flock of a million ducks fly by squawking. Upset he goes back inside and tell the man what happened and how he was upset to which the guy replies, "You didn't think I asked for an 8 inch pianist did you?"
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A man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a shot. He drinks it down, then looks in his shirt pocket. He turn back and orders another shot. On his 4th time doing this, the bartender says, "I just have to ask, why do you look in your pocket after you take a drink?"
"Well," the man says, "I have a picture of my wife in my pocket, when she starts looking good then I know its time to go home."
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