Welcome to Gaia! ::

well here's the story i met this guy at the beginning of the year, he was really awesome and a total nerd(loved that about him), he always new how to make me laugh and helped me through VERY tough times, well eventually, he became basically the only person i could trust and i ended up falling for him, I figured he would never like me so i sat by and watched as he went through bad relationship after bad relationship and talked him through all of it. I was always there for him and when he would fight with his best friend/ cousin, i always tried to help patch things up and he would appreciate it cuz they ended up making up in the end. So i confessed to three of my other closest friends, and one of them ended up saying she liked him 2. i was surprised but most of all sad because i figured he would sure enough pick her over me because she was always all touchy feely on him so i told her i gave up, mnths passed and i began falling into depression because life at home had gotten really tough and school wasn't any help either, even though i told her i was over him, the feeling never really went away and i was just trying to smother it. so one day i went to school and told his cousin/ my friend and his, that i was ready to block my heart off from him because i couldn't stand how much it hurt, then she pulled me aside and said that he had been wanting to ask me out but didn't have the guts, i was really amazed and joyous as any girl would be. so we talked about what had happened and i couldn't stop myself from being happy, i decided best that i should not tell the girl who liked him so she wouldn't be angry at me and think i betrayed her, i was still thinking the whole thing was a joke though. One day she sends me a text asking me if i still liked him, i didn't know how to respond so i just sent, dot dot dot, and felt like crap because i liked him. Later that day she asks me "what would u do if he cheated on u?" i replied "He wouldn't, and of he did, i would talk it out" she just said ok and didn't text back for about an hour, then i get a text saying "May the best girl win". It aggravated me a lot the she saw it as a competition, because she had been treating him like a piece of meat all week slapping his a** and all in front of everyone. About 2 hours after that he calls me and he can tell in my voice that im upset and it's to embarrassing for me to tell and he kept begging me to tell him until i caved and said "well that girl told me, may the best girl win, and it made me feel bad cuz i know u would never in a million years like me" there is silence for about 5 min. and he says "You do know i like you, right?" so the whole night we ended up talking about that but i kept thinking the whole time about how the other girl was going to feel. Two days later, he and i got together and i have been very happy since, but i can still feel her hostility toward me when she sees me and him together and it makes me feel absolutely horrid inside, and today i was here on gaia and i saw that she had posted that i was backstabbing and treat everyone like crap. I have very deep feelings for him and if i have to be hated for actually being happy for once in my measly life if the guy i care so much about, i don't mind. but it still hurts. What do u think? it's ok if u hate me cuz i feel like crap about myself, i can barely look at myself in the mirror sometimes

thanks a lot dude, that makes me feel a lot better. 3nodding