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Guys are retarded, there's no doubt about that. While they don't always know the best way to SAY things, they're much better at SHOWING it, and they'll do anything to protect you, that is, if your guy is serious.

Relationships are something that involve TWO people. Once you both made the decision to start going out with each other, you two became a partnership. You two became a team. If one person is happy, and the other one isn't, then that is a problem, and the BOTH of you need to work on it together. That goes both ways.

Now then, if your guy had a problem, and he came to you to resolve it, he was serious about it. Guys don't often go straight to the girl to figure something out, they like to go all over the place before they come straight to you. They don't do that often. And I have to admit, the fact that you hung up on him while he struggled to find words to say was a pretty bad move on your part. If he did that to you, I'm sure you'd hate him VERY quickly.

Try listening to some of the of the things he DID say to you:



Girls tend to have the problem of having to be right ALL THE TIME. The quickest way to drive your guy away is to completely dominate any and every argument or discussion. Every once in a while, just bite the bullet, and let him "win." Even if you have to hold back, even if you have to tell even being of yourself to just suck it up, even if you are completely right, just let him win sometimes. That's just how guys are. Even in a general friendship, no one wants to talk to someone who win all the time, the same way that no one wants to play a game with someone who wins, ALL THE TIME. It's simply part of the compromise in a relationship.



It seems that your guy feels that he isn't that important in your life anymore. What's happening there? Maybe you've told him a million times that he is, but as we all know, "Actions speak louder than words." Now, I don't know all of the complete details, but how often do you SHOW him that you care about him? That he means a lot to you? That you miss him, or that you don't want to be without him? Maybe I went overboard, but I'm sure you got the gist of what I was saying. We can talk all we want, but talk is cheap, Gerbil. Don't think this is an attack on you, though, because the same goes for him, too. Everyone, really.



Well, you've already explained the whole thing about your sister moving back in, but that's no reason for communication to stop. Maybe you guys could find other venues to communicate? School? A date? Online? Your favorite place? When's the last time you guys were alone together? Communication is the backbone if all relationships. Once that's broken, the relationship can't keep moving forward, because it can't walk anymore.



Wasn't to his liking? If you told it to him that way, it sounds like a sarcastic attack. He probably got annoyed and got defensive. I would've if my bf said that to me, at least.

Now as for whether the break should be permanent or not, I'd have to say no. Maybe that's not what you wanted to hear, but to ditch your guy after he tried to solve a problem with you wouldn't be the best course of action. As far as his guy mind was thinking, he was trying to make it so that the relationship would be better for the both of you. Relationships are full of ups and downs, believe me, I know, but if you guys hit a bump in the road, and fleeing is your only solution...I'd take a real good look at myself in the mirror.

All in all, and as I conclude, I think you should take your break. It sounds like a good idea right now, but in no way should it be permanent. Remember when you asked him what would make him happy, but all you got was silence? Well, he's had some time now, so try asking him again. When you finally feel like you can, talk to him again, and just ask him bluntly, "What can I do to make this relationship work better?"

If he wants it to work, he'll tell you.

Whoa that was a lot. blaugh

I hope that you guys get better, okay? I hate to see anyone break up. Best of luck. heart

I see. Well, does he know that you've been doing some of those things? Does he KNOW that you are forcing yourself to be nice to his douche friends? Or do you just assume he should know? Does he KNOW that you've been watching more sports? Or did you assume that he knew that? Maybe you guys could try watching a sports game together? Or you can set aside some time to just sit back and rip on all the friends you guys hate? Haha, that can be very fun.

You should calmly tell him how you felt about it. It seems to me like those comments he made over the phone made you feel invalid, and that you're not important to him, am I right? In that case, you both would be feeling the same way. After this break, don't give up. Sit down and remember why you like each other in the first place. Remember why you make each other smile, and laugh. Remember why you thought about him all the time, and remind him of how he can't live without you.

I'm sure that you two will get all of the validation you need. heart

You've told him this, huh? Well then all that's left to do is for you guys to put this behind and kept moving ahead. Never forget that you care about other. All this bickering has blinded you guys, and you've forgotten about the more important things. Use this break to just calm down. Don't think any negative thoughts about each other, it'll just make it all worse. Trust it's very common to see all of your bf's flaws when you're mad at him, lol, but use this time to spend time with yourself. After about a week, check in with each other again, and I'm sure you guys can figure it out. smile

Coming from a guy point of view, if you don't like the person you should break uup with him. Some guys are just jerks. Not all guys will accuse without evidence or explaination though. Just remember your a small fish in a big pond, You will meet many more people in your life.

thanks for the advice guys, really. please read the update on the first post, kay?