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 Posted: Sun Jan 25, 2009 6:56 pm
ninja Sex
The mother of a 17-year-old girl was concerned that her daughter was having sex.
Worried the girl might become pregnant and adversely impact the family's status, she consulted the family doctor.
The doctor told her that teenagers today were very willful and any attempt to stop the girl would probably result in rebellion.
He then told her to arrange for her daughter to be put on birth control and until then, talk to her and give her a box of condoms.
Later that evening, as her daughter was preparing for a date, the woman told her about the situation and handed her a box of condoms
The girl burst out laughing and reached over to hug her mother saying:
'Oh Mom! You don't have to worry about that! I'm dating Susan!'
Church
A man went to church one day and afterward he stopped to shake the preacher's hand.
He said 'Preacher, I'll tell you, that was a damned fine
sermon.
Damned good!'
The preacher said, 'Thank you sir, but I'd rather you didn't use profanity.
'
The man said, 'I was so damned impressed with that sermon I put five thousand dollars in the offering plate!'
The preacher said, 'No s**t?'
Pancakes
Brenda and Harold took their six-year-old son to the doctor.
With some hesitation, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health, they were concerned about his rather small p***s.
After examining the child, the doctor confidently declared, 'Just feed him pancakes. That should solve the problem.
'
The next morning when the boy arrived at breakfast, there was a large stack of warm pancakes in the middle of the table.
'Gee, Mom,' he exclaimed.
'For me?'
'Just take two,' Brenda replied. 'The rest are for your father. ninja
XD
arrow If you liked that, add me on here exclaim Check out my profile exclaim Help me get my dream avatar by donating items and gold exclaim ~ heart ~
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Posted: Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:23 pm
ROFL these are FUNNEH!! rofl
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Posted: Tue Jan 27, 2009 7:50 am
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Posted: Sat Feb 14, 2009 11:15 am
lol omg those were funny as hell i got sum of mi own
frist class blond
A plane is on its way to Detroit when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves into an open seat in the first class section.
The flight attendant watches her do this, and politely informs the woman that she must sit in economy class because that's the type of ticket she paid for.
The blonde replies, "I'm blonde, I'm beautiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."
After repeated attempts and no success at convincing the woman to move, the flight attendant goes into the cockpit and informs the pilot and co-piolet that there's a blonde bimbo sitting in first class who refuses to go back to her proper seat. The co-pilot goes back to the woman and explains why she needs to move, but once again the woman replies by saying, "I'm blonde, I'm beatiful, I'm going to Detroit and I'm staying right here."
The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and suggests that perhaps they should have the arrival gate call the police and have the woman arrested when they land. The pilot says, "You say she's blonde? I'll handle this. I'm married to a blonde. I speak blonde." He goes back to the woman and whispers quietly in her ear, and she says, "Oh, I'm sorry," then quickly moves back to her seat in economy class.
The flight attendant and co-pilot are amazed and ask him what he said to get her to move back to economy without causing any fuss.
"I told her first class isn't going to Detroit."
3 ppl in an airplane
Once there were 3 people in an airplane, one took a bite out of
an apple. She thought it was too sweet so she threw it out of
the plane. The second person took a bite out of a lemon and she
thought it was too sour so, she threw it out of the plane. Then
the last person took a bite out of a grenade and he thought it
was too crunchy so, he threw it out of the plane. Then they
landed and decided to go for a walk. They first passed a little
girl who was crying and they asked, "little girl, little girl,
why are you crying?" and the little girl said, "an apple came
down and killed my new kitty". Next they passed a little boy
who
was also crying. And they again asked, "little boy, little boy,
why are you crying?" and the little boy said, "a lemon came
down
and killed my new puppy." Then they passed a blonde sitting on
the side walk laughing her butt off. They asked, "why are you
laughing so hard?" and the blonde said, "I farted and the
building behind me blew up!!"
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