The way its sounding to me is that the entire story centers on this new girl. Now that would be cool for like a play or a tv show where you only see from the perspective of one character but a role play isn' just made up of one persons perspectives and idea's. In fact the best role play i've ever been in had up to 7 character perspectives all at once and it was unbelieveabley great. I suggest makeing it more then just one new kid so you can leave room for several perspectives on both sides of the story so it would be balanced. Sorry if I sound rude or you feel like im shooting your idea down i'm just trying to help.
And I hear ya about alot of typeing (Has record for longest reply....lol a page long).
