Quote:
One autumn there was an apple and a boy. The boy started a fire to keep warm on the autumn night and he took the apple from his pack and ate it as a snack. When he was done he tossed the remains of the apple into the fire. The warmth of the fire drew out a cat, and the cat jumped up in a nearby tree, where he ended up taking a nap. Later that night the boy went home and turned on his computer. Where he uploaded photos that he had taken of the tree and cat in the fires light. While working on his computer he fell asleep and didn't awake until the morning when the sun was rising and shining through his apartment window. A new day had begun and work needed to be done. Grabbing his axe from the tool shed outside of the apartment he then took the axe and found a ladder. Taking the ladder and the axe he went about chopping down branches from the nearby apple tree to create more firewood. And that is how this story goes of a boy with an apple, who sat by a fire with a cat sleeping in the tree, that he took pictures of for his computer, and woke up the next day to the sun shining through his apartment window, where he then found an axe and a latter to cut branches from the tree.
2. Mei Silja
Quote:
The person who did it had been eating apples, and lot of them since there were cores of the fruit laying around and even a whole one left on the headless body; like a calling card. The fire still burning at the fireplace says it wasn’t too long ago it happened, and that the person hoped it would start a fire; having moved a log so it was closer to the carpet outside of the old fire pit. It wouldn’t work; the carpet around that area was a none burnable material; well so said on the list when the man had bought it. How I know all of these things, well that dead person is my pet and I am his cat! Don’t give me that strange look; we cats are very smart, smarter than most you humans I would say. Yesterday I and my pet went to a park; he spent a long time on the computer or whatever he called it; clicking away looking up places that would allow pets. My pet is very loving; he lives alone so he treats me quiet kindly.
Anyway, so when we got to the park there was another pet, this one was one of those females who wore to much perfume thinking it could hide a day without shower; I will tell you people it doesn’t work!. That same smell is what I smelled around my house to come to think of it, well back to the story. Since we live in a crowded city there isn’t much grass, and other cats I met outside are always so scruffy while I am clean and an intellectual; to all of you humans that means I'm smart. So seeing the woman had a cat and one who looked just as good as me, I jogged to their place under a large tree so that I could talk. My pet followed loyally of course, and once he noticed I would not be moving any time soon he asked to join the woman who smiled and nodded. Air head, really you have a mouth that can be used more than stuffing your face! We talked for a long time, and the woman went off somewhere, coming back with an axe to show it too use. Her cat Max, said she collected those boring things but only old ones so that one was something called an antique.
You humans are strange, why collect a bunch of old stuff, unless it’s a book it is useless. So we stayed awhile and the humans chatted away about who knows what, while Max started talking to me. He said his owner was feeding him nasty canned cat food lately, and his coat wasn’t very pretty because of it. I agreed and comforted him, when will you humans get that can cat food is bad for us; it’s like junk food to you! Sadly it was getting late and so my pet took me home after I bid goodbye to Max, later that night I went to sleep so I must not have heard anything; my pet always turns on music for me when I sleep so it must have covered up any sounds. Then I woke up and saw this, and that is where I am now. Looking around I search out for more clues besides all those stupid apples, going to the window I see a ladder and I smiled. So they were still in the house even! Quickly I tripped the alarm for the window; my pet must not have closed the window so it wasn’t tripped when opened without the code. Well now it was, a sound distracted me and I went to see.
Who do I see but Max looking ruffled as his pet pulls out shelves of things hastily. I and he talk, he agrees his pet has lost her sense and with the need of a new one he helped me distract her while the police came. My music saved the day though since it covered up the sirens and the police stormed in and caught her. Thanks to my help of course since I dug my claws and teeth into her leg, and the police were all laughing and one picked me up a bit too roughly but the soothing petting made up for it. Later on I and Max were taken with them, and now I and he have a new home. I live with the head of policemen since he loved the fact he owned the cat that saved the day, and Max went to his daughter who lived next door strangely; must be one of those human family things. So now I have a new pet; and a new life because I get to go to ever case and help out! Much better then my old life, this one I get to help my pet out. Be careful you humans, I am watching you!
Anyway, so when we got to the park there was another pet, this one was one of those females who wore to much perfume thinking it could hide a day without shower; I will tell you people it doesn’t work!. That same smell is what I smelled around my house to come to think of it, well back to the story. Since we live in a crowded city there isn’t much grass, and other cats I met outside are always so scruffy while I am clean and an intellectual; to all of you humans that means I'm smart. So seeing the woman had a cat and one who looked just as good as me, I jogged to their place under a large tree so that I could talk. My pet followed loyally of course, and once he noticed I would not be moving any time soon he asked to join the woman who smiled and nodded. Air head, really you have a mouth that can be used more than stuffing your face! We talked for a long time, and the woman went off somewhere, coming back with an axe to show it too use. Her cat Max, said she collected those boring things but only old ones so that one was something called an antique.
You humans are strange, why collect a bunch of old stuff, unless it’s a book it is useless. So we stayed awhile and the humans chatted away about who knows what, while Max started talking to me. He said his owner was feeding him nasty canned cat food lately, and his coat wasn’t very pretty because of it. I agreed and comforted him, when will you humans get that can cat food is bad for us; it’s like junk food to you! Sadly it was getting late and so my pet took me home after I bid goodbye to Max, later that night I went to sleep so I must not have heard anything; my pet always turns on music for me when I sleep so it must have covered up any sounds. Then I woke up and saw this, and that is where I am now. Looking around I search out for more clues besides all those stupid apples, going to the window I see a ladder and I smiled. So they were still in the house even! Quickly I tripped the alarm for the window; my pet must not have closed the window so it wasn’t tripped when opened without the code. Well now it was, a sound distracted me and I went to see.
Who do I see but Max looking ruffled as his pet pulls out shelves of things hastily. I and he talk, he agrees his pet has lost her sense and with the need of a new one he helped me distract her while the police came. My music saved the day though since it covered up the sirens and the police stormed in and caught her. Thanks to my help of course since I dug my claws and teeth into her leg, and the police were all laughing and one picked me up a bit too roughly but the soothing petting made up for it. Later on I and Max were taken with them, and now I and he have a new home. I live with the head of policemen since he loved the fact he owned the cat that saved the day, and Max went to his daughter who lived next door strangely; must be one of those human family things. So now I have a new pet; and a new life because I get to go to ever case and help out! Much better then my old life, this one I get to help my pet out. Be careful you humans, I am watching you!
3. Lethality
Quote:
Orion bit into the apple noisily, as he rushed to pull on a coat. It was exactly like the previous morning, and was likely to end in the same path as well. He was late for work from oversleeping, and he had stayed up in order to find some a bit of insight on the latest case. The purpose of the latter was a failure. Misfortune seemed to run in their blood, considering the numerous amounts of times that they had called him, and various other detectives within their fair city.
The last time had been about their daughter’s kidnapping. However, in the end, the police had managed to find their daughter, perfectly safe though still stuck within the hospital. She had amnesia; a seemingly army of doctors reported. The girl couldn’t remember anything other than falling unconscious, darkness, and the officer that had recovered her from it. No one dared to question her, officially anyway.
There had been several detectives literally thrown out of the hospital after secretly sneaking into the daughter’s rooms and pushing the girl into hysterics.
Orion had little interest in such a high-profile case like this, but he was a bit short on cash and trying didn’t seem to be a problem. Besides, the dark-haired detective was semi-fond of the current child the kidnappers were trying to ransom away.
The family had brought the teenager back from boarding school for protection since his sister’s kidnapping. However, Christopher insulted everyone within a ten-meter radius, particularly the detectives and police officers that wandered around the client’s large estate. Useless people, gold-diggers, lazy bums were among some of the insults that spouted out from the teenager’s loud mouth. There was little reason to question him. (Not that anyone wanted to be near the kid unless he or she had a serious fetish for ego bashing.)
Still, it was amusing that someone could even kidnap Christopher. With a black belt in karate and a foul mouth, who’d want to keep such a kid in this midst for any long period? Understandably, Orion thought as he sought to light his cigarette, there was the money.
Orion let his legs slow into a semi-speedy walk before entering a seedy looking place from the back entrance. The sign out front had a lively flame engraved on the wood with the name of the bar next to it. “Hey, Tobias,” he greeted the man washing out mugs and plopped down easily on one of the bar stools. As it was morning, the establishment wasn’t open, but it didn’t stop Orion from entering all the same. Tobias’ place was easily one of the popular places to be for sleazy people desperate for money.
“Eh,” Orion huffed, blowing out a stream of smoke from his mouth. “I’m here for work.”
“The last time I heard from you, you were a thief,” Tobias raised a brow. “I’m not letting you steal anything.”
“I’m a detective now,” Orion smirked. “Anyway, do you know about the O’Brien case?”
“I’d be stuck under a rock not to have,” Tobias replied with a snort. “It’s the main topic here in the bar lately.”
“Can I bribe you to spilling anything substantial and helpful to me?”
“It’ll only cost you an arm or a leg,” Tobias shook his head, frosty white hair skewering his vision. “Even if I did, why should I tell a mangy cat like you?”
Orion’s lips curved into a wicked smile. He pressed his cigarette into a clean ashtray not far from him and cracked his fingers. “If you do… that embarrassing incident might not get into Ran Mao’s ears. It might break her vision of you, you know—a big, strong man like you wouldn’t have anything to do with that; don't you think? I might have forgotten it… if you amaze me with a story.”
Immediately, and predictably, Tobias sputtered. A rusty stain crept up his face as he set a dull blue-eyed glare at the man sitting calmly before him at the bar. “I thought you forgot about that!” Orion’s saffron gaze continued to pin him. “Fine! The kidnappers used a house on a hill for a meeting place. That’s all I can say. Go do your snooping elsewhere or I’ll punch your face in.”
“…That’s not very---“
“Out!”
Orion snorted and went. A house on a hill…? That’s not very helpful at all. Still, better than the nothing he had so far.
A day or two passed with fruitless searching. Orion climbed up the grassy hill and glared out at the sun dying out at the horizon. Behind him, there was an empty house. With some lock-picking skills, he had broken in and search through the dusty rooms. There was nothing at all that might have indicated some clues.
A pale white feline crept up between his legs like a silent wind. It curled and let out a slow rumbling purr before darting off towards the lone tree not too far off. Orion followed it aimlessly, hoping to catch it. He was unbelievably fond of cats, though the apartment he rented wouldn’t allow pets of any kind. “Here, pretty kitty,” the detective called hopefully, before climbing the branches after the cat.
“Ah, almost gotcha,” he murmured, as the cat climbed higher. Orion seated himself on the lower branches of the tree with a sigh, frowning as he caught the faintest sign of an old sheet of paper within one of the niches of the tree. “What’s this? A secret message for a lover?”
He snorted, tugging the paper out and read –8-2 Ex---t S-re-t. “Is this… an address?”
Bang! Orion jerked in surprise, body falling out of the tree as his shoulder sang out in pain. His head met the ground with a dull thud, and blessed unconsciousness reined him in like a caress of a lover. “Wha…”
When Orion awoke, he saw Christopher’s face in front of him. Not thinking, he tried to pull a punch for the invasion of his personal space only to blink back the instant pain the slight movement brought. “Ow!” He grunted and sat himself up slowly, noting that whoever had brought him here had tied them both up nicely. “Where are we?”
”Do you think I know? Dumb a**.”
”Yeah, I missed you, too.” Orion remarked dryly. He looked around their surroundings, taking note of the things around them. A computer monitor sat on an aged desk not too far off, but there was only that. A few broken crates were in one corner, along with an axe that neither of them could use while tied up. “Where are the kidnappers?”
“Out to get food, probably. They’re hired thugs; their bosses are businessmen who’s businesses are going bankrupt. People are so ******** desperate sometimes… like you, huh?”
Orion ignored the jab and concentrated on his bindings. His time as a thief hadn’t been for naught, and soon the tight ropes loosened from around him and dropped around his body. “I suppose so,” he slid an eye towards the window, where he could see many buildings. “Sun’s setting; I know where we are. How long have I been out?”
“A few hours since they brought you in, I guess. They were apparently told not to kill anyone, yet.”
“Your words are like music to my ears, Christopher.” Orion stood and released the teenager from his bindings. “Are you hurt?”
“No.”
”Good, let’s get out of here.” Orion picked up the axe, and tapped it lightly. He grimaced slightly when the axe head simply fell out with a thud. “Never mind about breaking open the door,” the man muttered and went for the window. Predictably, it wouldn’t open. Orion sighed, and then preceded to break the glass as best he could with one arm. “Climb down the ladder. Who knows when the thugs are going to come back?”
”Yeah… um… thanks, Orion.” The boy climbed gingerly out the window.
”Hurry up, if you would please.” Orion glanced towards the door. He paled slightly when he noted the door rattling. A stick was probably not the best weapon against some hired thugs. “Better start hurrying faster now; they’re back.”
“What?” Christopher stumbled down the rest of the way before making it towards the lower platform of the fire escape.
”Hold it!” The voice was unmistakably like some sleaze ball from the movies, Orion mused. He tilted his head towards the sound and his eyes widened slightly. “Oh s**t, he’s huge.” Climbing quickly out the window with some huge mugger-look-alike right on his tail, Orion slid down the first set of stairs and clambered towards the next. It took little to catch up Christopher, though his head was starting to spin. “He doesn’t fit through the window. We got to get out of here by the time he gets down here.”
“I think I can take him; he snuck behind me last time. That cheating ******** not think about that now. Okay? I don’t want to be responsible for that scenario unless it’s the last option. Maybe we can hail a taxi, you know.”
”Do they even come to this part of the city?”
”No, but it’s worth a shot if one passes by.”
“I don’t think they’re chasing us. See? That one isn’t even running…”
”…you really were a noisy brat, weren’t you? Run anyway. It’ll do you good,” Orion mentally sighed in relief. He wouldn’t stand a chance against either of the goons. “Do you know who kidnapped you?”
”I saw them, but… Takahiro? That’s all I remember about his name. Hold it, you’re trying to weasel out some information, aren’t you? You b*****d!”
”Ah… good enough.”
The last time had been about their daughter’s kidnapping. However, in the end, the police had managed to find their daughter, perfectly safe though still stuck within the hospital. She had amnesia; a seemingly army of doctors reported. The girl couldn’t remember anything other than falling unconscious, darkness, and the officer that had recovered her from it. No one dared to question her, officially anyway.
There had been several detectives literally thrown out of the hospital after secretly sneaking into the daughter’s rooms and pushing the girl into hysterics.
Orion had little interest in such a high-profile case like this, but he was a bit short on cash and trying didn’t seem to be a problem. Besides, the dark-haired detective was semi-fond of the current child the kidnappers were trying to ransom away.
The family had brought the teenager back from boarding school for protection since his sister’s kidnapping. However, Christopher insulted everyone within a ten-meter radius, particularly the detectives and police officers that wandered around the client’s large estate. Useless people, gold-diggers, lazy bums were among some of the insults that spouted out from the teenager’s loud mouth. There was little reason to question him. (Not that anyone wanted to be near the kid unless he or she had a serious fetish for ego bashing.)
Still, it was amusing that someone could even kidnap Christopher. With a black belt in karate and a foul mouth, who’d want to keep such a kid in this midst for any long period? Understandably, Orion thought as he sought to light his cigarette, there was the money.
Orion let his legs slow into a semi-speedy walk before entering a seedy looking place from the back entrance. The sign out front had a lively flame engraved on the wood with the name of the bar next to it. “Hey, Tobias,” he greeted the man washing out mugs and plopped down easily on one of the bar stools. As it was morning, the establishment wasn’t open, but it didn’t stop Orion from entering all the same. Tobias’ place was easily one of the popular places to be for sleazy people desperate for money.
“Eh,” Orion huffed, blowing out a stream of smoke from his mouth. “I’m here for work.”
“The last time I heard from you, you were a thief,” Tobias raised a brow. “I’m not letting you steal anything.”
“I’m a detective now,” Orion smirked. “Anyway, do you know about the O’Brien case?”
“I’d be stuck under a rock not to have,” Tobias replied with a snort. “It’s the main topic here in the bar lately.”
“Can I bribe you to spilling anything substantial and helpful to me?”
“It’ll only cost you an arm or a leg,” Tobias shook his head, frosty white hair skewering his vision. “Even if I did, why should I tell a mangy cat like you?”
Orion’s lips curved into a wicked smile. He pressed his cigarette into a clean ashtray not far from him and cracked his fingers. “If you do… that embarrassing incident might not get into Ran Mao’s ears. It might break her vision of you, you know—a big, strong man like you wouldn’t have anything to do with that; don't you think? I might have forgotten it… if you amaze me with a story.”
Immediately, and predictably, Tobias sputtered. A rusty stain crept up his face as he set a dull blue-eyed glare at the man sitting calmly before him at the bar. “I thought you forgot about that!” Orion’s saffron gaze continued to pin him. “Fine! The kidnappers used a house on a hill for a meeting place. That’s all I can say. Go do your snooping elsewhere or I’ll punch your face in.”
“…That’s not very---“
“Out!”
Orion snorted and went. A house on a hill…? That’s not very helpful at all. Still, better than the nothing he had so far.
A day or two passed with fruitless searching. Orion climbed up the grassy hill and glared out at the sun dying out at the horizon. Behind him, there was an empty house. With some lock-picking skills, he had broken in and search through the dusty rooms. There was nothing at all that might have indicated some clues.
A pale white feline crept up between his legs like a silent wind. It curled and let out a slow rumbling purr before darting off towards the lone tree not too far off. Orion followed it aimlessly, hoping to catch it. He was unbelievably fond of cats, though the apartment he rented wouldn’t allow pets of any kind. “Here, pretty kitty,” the detective called hopefully, before climbing the branches after the cat.
“Ah, almost gotcha,” he murmured, as the cat climbed higher. Orion seated himself on the lower branches of the tree with a sigh, frowning as he caught the faintest sign of an old sheet of paper within one of the niches of the tree. “What’s this? A secret message for a lover?”
He snorted, tugging the paper out and read –8-2 Ex---t S-re-t. “Is this… an address?”
Bang! Orion jerked in surprise, body falling out of the tree as his shoulder sang out in pain. His head met the ground with a dull thud, and blessed unconsciousness reined him in like a caress of a lover. “Wha…”
When Orion awoke, he saw Christopher’s face in front of him. Not thinking, he tried to pull a punch for the invasion of his personal space only to blink back the instant pain the slight movement brought. “Ow!” He grunted and sat himself up slowly, noting that whoever had brought him here had tied them both up nicely. “Where are we?”
”Do you think I know? Dumb a**.”
”Yeah, I missed you, too.” Orion remarked dryly. He looked around their surroundings, taking note of the things around them. A computer monitor sat on an aged desk not too far off, but there was only that. A few broken crates were in one corner, along with an axe that neither of them could use while tied up. “Where are the kidnappers?”
“Out to get food, probably. They’re hired thugs; their bosses are businessmen who’s businesses are going bankrupt. People are so ******** desperate sometimes… like you, huh?”
Orion ignored the jab and concentrated on his bindings. His time as a thief hadn’t been for naught, and soon the tight ropes loosened from around him and dropped around his body. “I suppose so,” he slid an eye towards the window, where he could see many buildings. “Sun’s setting; I know where we are. How long have I been out?”
“A few hours since they brought you in, I guess. They were apparently told not to kill anyone, yet.”
“Your words are like music to my ears, Christopher.” Orion stood and released the teenager from his bindings. “Are you hurt?”
“No.”
”Good, let’s get out of here.” Orion picked up the axe, and tapped it lightly. He grimaced slightly when the axe head simply fell out with a thud. “Never mind about breaking open the door,” the man muttered and went for the window. Predictably, it wouldn’t open. Orion sighed, and then preceded to break the glass as best he could with one arm. “Climb down the ladder. Who knows when the thugs are going to come back?”
”Yeah… um… thanks, Orion.” The boy climbed gingerly out the window.
”Hurry up, if you would please.” Orion glanced towards the door. He paled slightly when he noted the door rattling. A stick was probably not the best weapon against some hired thugs. “Better start hurrying faster now; they’re back.”
“What?” Christopher stumbled down the rest of the way before making it towards the lower platform of the fire escape.
”Hold it!” The voice was unmistakably like some sleaze ball from the movies, Orion mused. He tilted his head towards the sound and his eyes widened slightly. “Oh s**t, he’s huge.” Climbing quickly out the window with some huge mugger-look-alike right on his tail, Orion slid down the first set of stairs and clambered towards the next. It took little to catch up Christopher, though his head was starting to spin. “He doesn’t fit through the window. We got to get out of here by the time he gets down here.”
“I think I can take him; he snuck behind me last time. That cheating ******** not think about that now. Okay? I don’t want to be responsible for that scenario unless it’s the last option. Maybe we can hail a taxi, you know.”
”Do they even come to this part of the city?”
”No, but it’s worth a shot if one passes by.”
“I don’t think they’re chasing us. See? That one isn’t even running…”
”…you really were a noisy brat, weren’t you? Run anyway. It’ll do you good,” Orion mentally sighed in relief. He wouldn’t stand a chance against either of the goons. “Do you know who kidnapped you?”
”I saw them, but… Takahiro? That’s all I remember about his name. Hold it, you’re trying to weasel out some information, aren’t you? You b*****d!”
”Ah… good enough.”
4. Lissome Llia
Quote:
The Apple logo occupied the screen for a full ten seconds before it was replaced by the "low battery" symbol. <********!" Dan exclaimed at his iPod, not realising how loud he was with the earphones still plugged into his ears. Nobody in the cafe paid the young man any attention, however, for they were all turned towards the window. After stashing his gadgets and mumbling an apology, Dan joined them as well, and was shocked and awed at once to see the flames. There was a certain destructive beauty about them. He idly wondered why he was able to see the prettiness in everything, but snapped out of this daze quickly when he heard the hysterical wailing of a mother for her child. He dashed across the road towards the firetruck, where the head fireman hailed him.
"Hey, Dan. Wish you were still with us... this is a pretty nice change from getting cats down from trees for little old ladies, don'cha think?"
"You have to let me help."
"No can do, you haven't fully recovered from the last fire... Hey, hey where are you going?"
"Which apartment's yours, Ma'am?"
She stopped sobbing and pointed towards a third floor window, hope shining through her tears. Dan cracked his knuckles. This wouldn't be too hard.
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~
Mission Begin flashes across your computer monitor in bold bright orange before fading. You shift Dan's view to check for the right apartment, scanning the building. It's not too hard to spot - targets are highlighted in glowy red. You make Dan pick up one of the axes used for breaking windows, and dash for the ladder before your old colleagues can stop you. You smash the window and climb through, and the screen whites out to the next scene...
"Hey, Dan. Wish you were still with us... this is a pretty nice change from getting cats down from trees for little old ladies, don'cha think?"
"You have to let me help."
"No can do, you haven't fully recovered from the last fire... Hey, hey where are you going?"
"Which apartment's yours, Ma'am?"
She stopped sobbing and pointed towards a third floor window, hope shining through her tears. Dan cracked his knuckles. This wouldn't be too hard.
~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~
Mission Begin flashes across your computer monitor in bold bright orange before fading. You shift Dan's view to check for the right apartment, scanning the building. It's not too hard to spot - targets are highlighted in glowy red. You make Dan pick up one of the axes used for breaking windows, and dash for the ladder before your old colleagues can stop you. You smash the window and climb through, and the screen whites out to the next scene...
5. FireFoxNinetails
Quote:
I blink as I stare at the month's new donation item. An apple. Wow, gaia was as creative as ever. But I bought it anyways, just for the lulz. I had been a giant pumpkin with a christmas wreath for months, why not a giant apple this time?
Then, I wandered into ZOMG to test the reactions of some of the people who didn't pay attention to the gaia announcements. I don't blame them though, there are about 3 each day, maybe 2 if the staff felt tired. Anyways, after waltzing to Zen Gardens and blasting everyone with a fire rain ring (and becoming a scary-looking ominously-glowing kickass apple of doom), I met up with my friend who had a cat avatar. Yes, a cat. Gaia has allowed avatars to turn into foxes, grunnies, chocobo-like creatures, wolves, raptors, and etc. So cats were obviously next on their hitlist.
But overall it was a bunch of lulz for everyone to see an apple and a cat roaming around together. The cat then wanted to do the wishing tree quest but I hadn't completed that evil Kokeshi's doll quest yet so instead we went to explore other territories. Unfortunately ZOMG decided to epically glitched out on everyone and spit me out of the servers five seconds after we reached a null chamber.
Being pissed at the general overall failure of gaia at the moment and re-realizing my lack of a social life, I decided to go outside for a while just to stare at the clouds. The clouds were pretty, but I didn't get to stare at them long because a wasp forced me to flee back into the safety of my house. There ends my not-so-epic adventure away from the computer.
I logged back online, this time going on an old Runescape account to see if I could hunt down any friends.The old MMORPG hadn't improved much since a year ago but it was still entertaining to play once in a while. I called up an old friend and we decided to go to a secret dungeon full of a room of flying axes blocking our way of farming blue dragons. Their hides fetched a nice price in the market as did their scales.
Our run went pretty well, we maanged to flee from the enchanted axes and get to a safe hiding spot in the dragon's lair. Then the massacre began - but we weren't the only ones comitting it of course. There were tons of others looking to farm the creatures, everyone wanted in on the good profit. So my friend took down the dragons slowly by her physical strength while I was her backup magic aid that weakened the dragon and occasionally blasted it with a spell. After glancing over my spell list, I noticed a new spell in the shape of a ladder.
Immediately my "omg this is going to be lame" senses tingled but I also knew it'd probably be amusing, so I used the attack. A giant ladder was summoned over the dragon, "cursing" it.
Looks like gaia wasn't the only place running out of ideas.
Then, I wandered into ZOMG to test the reactions of some of the people who didn't pay attention to the gaia announcements. I don't blame them though, there are about 3 each day, maybe 2 if the staff felt tired. Anyways, after waltzing to Zen Gardens and blasting everyone with a fire rain ring (and becoming a scary-looking ominously-glowing kickass apple of doom), I met up with my friend who had a cat avatar. Yes, a cat. Gaia has allowed avatars to turn into foxes, grunnies, chocobo-like creatures, wolves, raptors, and etc. So cats were obviously next on their hitlist.
But overall it was a bunch of lulz for everyone to see an apple and a cat roaming around together. The cat then wanted to do the wishing tree quest but I hadn't completed that evil Kokeshi's doll quest yet so instead we went to explore other territories. Unfortunately ZOMG decided to epically glitched out on everyone and spit me out of the servers five seconds after we reached a null chamber.
Being pissed at the general overall failure of gaia at the moment and re-realizing my lack of a social life, I decided to go outside for a while just to stare at the clouds. The clouds were pretty, but I didn't get to stare at them long because a wasp forced me to flee back into the safety of my house. There ends my not-so-epic adventure away from the computer.
I logged back online, this time going on an old Runescape account to see if I could hunt down any friends.The old MMORPG hadn't improved much since a year ago but it was still entertaining to play once in a while. I called up an old friend and we decided to go to a secret dungeon full of a room of flying axes blocking our way of farming blue dragons. Their hides fetched a nice price in the market as did their scales.
Our run went pretty well, we maanged to flee from the enchanted axes and get to a safe hiding spot in the dragon's lair. Then the massacre began - but we weren't the only ones comitting it of course. There were tons of others looking to farm the creatures, everyone wanted in on the good profit. So my friend took down the dragons slowly by her physical strength while I was her backup magic aid that weakened the dragon and occasionally blasted it with a spell. After glancing over my spell list, I noticed a new spell in the shape of a ladder.
Immediately my "omg this is going to be lame" senses tingled but I also knew it'd probably be amusing, so I used the attack. A giant ladder was summoned over the dragon, "cursing" it.
Looks like gaia wasn't the only place running out of ideas.
6. shyanimegrl
Quote:
“Yeah we know the world’s full of-ah, just what I wanted to see last,” I said, the portable television finally out after draining the last of the batteries. Then that’s when I bit the apple.
I heard o’ Sleeping Beauty being poisoned by an apple, but I never felt particularly wary of an apple turning against me. One bite then wham! I’m a spirit staring at my lifeless body. If things aren’t bizarre enough a voice tells me I have to get rid’ev some computer with some axe before the sun sets below the horizon so I can ‘av my second life. I say, I may be homeless, but I’m no thief criminal. I can’t even afford the ax to put down the computer wif!
Looks like I’m alarming nobody, wandering around like this. So what happens next is there’s this cat in a tree ya see? Turns out it can see me and I can communicate with it. I tell him my idea, leaving out the parts that might make him ‘ezitate and letting him hear his benefits. I tell him I’ll possess him and let him down o’ the tree, ‘cause we aren’t scared of the same things—I informed him polite-like. What I don’t tell him iz that I thought with that collar on ‘im he probably lives in a place where his person owns a computer and that-aye plan on followin’ him there. But still he don’t trust me all hissing and the like. I tells him I’ll prove it to him and possess and gets him down, but after he just runs away. What a scrooge, huh? I figured it’s tha hollidays and they’d let me beat’up ‘heir ‘ardware to get a secund life ‘n all az uh good deed..
So, I drop the getting some kinda permission idea and go the sweet living area. I sneak around and finally find a computer, I see it through the windaw ya see, cuz you can be sneaky and still not be a criminal ya knaw what I mean? So here I am and I check the sun and it hits me! What ‘orizon was that nut talkin’ about exacly?! What was said sounds like uh ‘undred percent FLABRICATION if ya ask me, like those stroke o’ midnight scenarios in those storybooks—am aye suppose to ‘xpect some pristine glittering sun setting on hills o’ daisies?
Anyway, the other thing is I ain’t got the axe around to boot ayes realize. So then I walks and wander again and I pass this school ya followin’ me? I pass this school and there’s that same shady guy in the same shady getup in that crim’nal report I just see-ed before the TV went out on me, yeah with that same computer, yeah that mad killer computin’ fella. Then it kinda all connected in my head ya see. He shuts ‘is ‘aptop and ‘ets ready ta go for this lady comin’ out of the place of learnin’. Then there it is, an axe wedged inta the stump o’ a felled tree. Ayez possess it outta the stump, the fella’z real close ta the lady, and—that wuz the end o’ my dream.
Now it’s a lil pas’ twelve. I sees the ladder and thinks that it may be like they’d said that usin’ it as a door frame’d eventually get to me.
“’ey, Mis’er Ryler, ya ‘wake now?”
“’ey, Mis’er Ryler, would’ja read us Tha Lil Mermaid again?”
“Naw, not those sissy, boring stuff.”
“Naw aw, Mis’er Ryler said ‘zactly like this: It ain’t bad stuff.”
“’ey now, ya kids wanna ‘ear a story or not?” And this got affirmatives from tha kids in unison. Then I told ‘em to come on it ta taunt ‘em. They were shaking their heads and one of ‘em said somethin’ like: ain’t it bad luck to walk under a ladder, Mis’er Ryler? I played wif ‘em more before goin’ outside ta meet ‘em, sayin’, “Nah, only in your dreams and it seems to me that the dreams don’t seem to be half bad.”
I heard o’ Sleeping Beauty being poisoned by an apple, but I never felt particularly wary of an apple turning against me. One bite then wham! I’m a spirit staring at my lifeless body. If things aren’t bizarre enough a voice tells me I have to get rid’ev some computer with some axe before the sun sets below the horizon so I can ‘av my second life. I say, I may be homeless, but I’m no thief criminal. I can’t even afford the ax to put down the computer wif!
Looks like I’m alarming nobody, wandering around like this. So what happens next is there’s this cat in a tree ya see? Turns out it can see me and I can communicate with it. I tell him my idea, leaving out the parts that might make him ‘ezitate and letting him hear his benefits. I tell him I’ll possess him and let him down o’ the tree, ‘cause we aren’t scared of the same things—I informed him polite-like. What I don’t tell him iz that I thought with that collar on ‘im he probably lives in a place where his person owns a computer and that-aye plan on followin’ him there. But still he don’t trust me all hissing and the like. I tells him I’ll prove it to him and possess and gets him down, but after he just runs away. What a scrooge, huh? I figured it’s tha hollidays and they’d let me beat’up ‘heir ‘ardware to get a secund life ‘n all az uh good deed..
So, I drop the getting some kinda permission idea and go the sweet living area. I sneak around and finally find a computer, I see it through the windaw ya see, cuz you can be sneaky and still not be a criminal ya knaw what I mean? So here I am and I check the sun and it hits me! What ‘orizon was that nut talkin’ about exacly?! What was said sounds like uh ‘undred percent FLABRICATION if ya ask me, like those stroke o’ midnight scenarios in those storybooks—am aye suppose to ‘xpect some pristine glittering sun setting on hills o’ daisies?
Anyway, the other thing is I ain’t got the axe around to boot ayes realize. So then I walks and wander again and I pass this school ya followin’ me? I pass this school and there’s that same shady guy in the same shady getup in that crim’nal report I just see-ed before the TV went out on me, yeah with that same computer, yeah that mad killer computin’ fella. Then it kinda all connected in my head ya see. He shuts ‘is ‘aptop and ‘ets ready ta go for this lady comin’ out of the place of learnin’. Then there it is, an axe wedged inta the stump o’ a felled tree. Ayez possess it outta the stump, the fella’z real close ta the lady, and—that wuz the end o’ my dream.
Now it’s a lil pas’ twelve. I sees the ladder and thinks that it may be like they’d said that usin’ it as a door frame’d eventually get to me.
“’ey, Mis’er Ryler, ya ‘wake now?”
“’ey, Mis’er Ryler, would’ja read us Tha Lil Mermaid again?”
“Naw, not those sissy, boring stuff.”
“Naw aw, Mis’er Ryler said ‘zactly like this: It ain’t bad stuff.”
“’ey now, ya kids wanna ‘ear a story or not?” And this got affirmatives from tha kids in unison. Then I told ‘em to come on it ta taunt ‘em. They were shaking their heads and one of ‘em said somethin’ like: ain’t it bad luck to walk under a ladder, Mis’er Ryler? I played wif ‘em more before goin’ outside ta meet ‘em, sayin’, “Nah, only in your dreams and it seems to me that the dreams don’t seem to be half bad.”
7. CuterThanYou
Quote:
Bubba Joe bit into the crisp red apple, a bit of its sweet juices dribbling down the side of his mouth and chin as he continued to devour the fruit in a very unmannerly fashion. His eyes continued to wander off into the distance as his slackened jaw occasionally chewed the pieces in his mouth.
Stepping to one side, he dodged the small fire in his path as he headed out in a direction parallel to the midday sun. He knew Pa would be mad at him for burnin' stuff again, but there was somethin' about the distinct smell of burning wood that set Bubba's mind at ease. Perhaps the fumes got his brain to jumblin' around a bit, he wasn't sure. He just liked the way it smelled, and there wasn't nothin' wrong with that!
He swallowed the piece in his mouth and then turned to whistle to Whiskers, his ever-so faithful feline companion. Whiskers was good 'bout killing all the rats around the barnyard, but other than that, he was one lazy cat. And Bubba liked lazy. After all, Bubba, for the most part, was pretty darn lazy himself.
Sighing, he slumped against the nearby tree (a favorite at that), a large apple tree from whence his juicy treat had originated from. The back of his denim overalls scratched against the bark, bits splintering and dropping off as his careless young body slid down against the heavy tree trunk. Up on the hill, Bubba could see many things from his tree. Standing up IN the tree, he could see even further. But that just wasn't enough anymore.
Bubba had seen things in the past few days he ain't never seen before.
Thanks to a visit to see his cousin Billy Joe, Bubba now knew there was much more to the world than his simple farm lifestyle. Why, he'd never even seen a computer before, not until he saw Billy's. And low and behold, not only did Billy have one, but both his parents had had ones too! And Bubba's parents didn't so much as have a color television set yet! Not only did they have fancy gadgets with pictures and those in-ter-net whatcha call-its, but they didn't have to take care of chickens or pigs or nothin'! Instead, all of their houses got to be all scrunched up and on top of one another. Why, Bubba was certain that Billy never had to do chores like milkin' cows or patchin' up the shingles on a barnhouse. In fact, Billy's dad even OWNED the apartment complex thing they were living in. All the people who lived around them paid Uncle Jimbo to live there! What a sweet deal!
He allowed his apple to roll freely from his hand onto the ground as an idea slowly formed in his rather slow mind. Ignoring the fact Whiskers was now making lunch of his apple between the frequent battings at the fruit with his gray and white paws, the young boy stood up from his spot and stretched himself out.
Bubba was going to get smart 'n fancy like his cousin. He'd never been shown up by anyone before, and he wasn't about to let his good for nothin' cousin be the one to do it. And if his dad could get rich quick, then Bubba was going to do the same thing!
He slowly drug his feet towards the barn, in no hurry to get to actual manual labor. Once inside, he rummaged through the dusty shelves in Pa's back cabinet until he finally came across what he was looking for... the 'ol axe Grandpa had given Pa, then Pa'd given to Bubba when he turned 10. Every 10 year old needs an axe, Pa had figured, so finally Bubba was going to put it to good use, or so he assumed.
Fingers excited at the notion that he'd be countin' up dollar bills soon, he picked up from his slow pace into a shuffle, making his way to the outside of the barn. There, by the side of the faded red wall, stood the old sturdy ladder he'd climbed many many times to repair the barn roof. Grabbing one end, he drug it in one hand while gripping tightly to his axe with the other.
Soon enough, he returned to his apple tree, and propped the ladder against its wide trunk. At his feet, Whiskers meowed as if to inquire what in the world he was doing, climbing the apple tree with that horribly sharp looking object, but Bubba ignored him. He'd be useful when it came for the tree's inhabitants to vacate, and Whiskers could help with that once the bushy tailed vermin found their way down the tree. They wouldn't be able to pay, so they couldn't stay, no sirree. This was going to be the first of many Bubba Joe Incorp-o-rated Apartment buildings when he finished preparin' them for paying customers.
Raising the axe in the air, he let it swing hard and swift into one of the tree's many branches.
It was time to get rich.
Stepping to one side, he dodged the small fire in his path as he headed out in a direction parallel to the midday sun. He knew Pa would be mad at him for burnin' stuff again, but there was somethin' about the distinct smell of burning wood that set Bubba's mind at ease. Perhaps the fumes got his brain to jumblin' around a bit, he wasn't sure. He just liked the way it smelled, and there wasn't nothin' wrong with that!
He swallowed the piece in his mouth and then turned to whistle to Whiskers, his ever-so faithful feline companion. Whiskers was good 'bout killing all the rats around the barnyard, but other than that, he was one lazy cat. And Bubba liked lazy. After all, Bubba, for the most part, was pretty darn lazy himself.
Sighing, he slumped against the nearby tree (a favorite at that), a large apple tree from whence his juicy treat had originated from. The back of his denim overalls scratched against the bark, bits splintering and dropping off as his careless young body slid down against the heavy tree trunk. Up on the hill, Bubba could see many things from his tree. Standing up IN the tree, he could see even further. But that just wasn't enough anymore.
Bubba had seen things in the past few days he ain't never seen before.
Thanks to a visit to see his cousin Billy Joe, Bubba now knew there was much more to the world than his simple farm lifestyle. Why, he'd never even seen a computer before, not until he saw Billy's. And low and behold, not only did Billy have one, but both his parents had had ones too! And Bubba's parents didn't so much as have a color television set yet! Not only did they have fancy gadgets with pictures and those in-ter-net whatcha call-its, but they didn't have to take care of chickens or pigs or nothin'! Instead, all of their houses got to be all scrunched up and on top of one another. Why, Bubba was certain that Billy never had to do chores like milkin' cows or patchin' up the shingles on a barnhouse. In fact, Billy's dad even OWNED the apartment complex thing they were living in. All the people who lived around them paid Uncle Jimbo to live there! What a sweet deal!
He allowed his apple to roll freely from his hand onto the ground as an idea slowly formed in his rather slow mind. Ignoring the fact Whiskers was now making lunch of his apple between the frequent battings at the fruit with his gray and white paws, the young boy stood up from his spot and stretched himself out.
Bubba was going to get smart 'n fancy like his cousin. He'd never been shown up by anyone before, and he wasn't about to let his good for nothin' cousin be the one to do it. And if his dad could get rich quick, then Bubba was going to do the same thing!
He slowly drug his feet towards the barn, in no hurry to get to actual manual labor. Once inside, he rummaged through the dusty shelves in Pa's back cabinet until he finally came across what he was looking for... the 'ol axe Grandpa had given Pa, then Pa'd given to Bubba when he turned 10. Every 10 year old needs an axe, Pa had figured, so finally Bubba was going to put it to good use, or so he assumed.
Fingers excited at the notion that he'd be countin' up dollar bills soon, he picked up from his slow pace into a shuffle, making his way to the outside of the barn. There, by the side of the faded red wall, stood the old sturdy ladder he'd climbed many many times to repair the barn roof. Grabbing one end, he drug it in one hand while gripping tightly to his axe with the other.
Soon enough, he returned to his apple tree, and propped the ladder against its wide trunk. At his feet, Whiskers meowed as if to inquire what in the world he was doing, climbing the apple tree with that horribly sharp looking object, but Bubba ignored him. He'd be useful when it came for the tree's inhabitants to vacate, and Whiskers could help with that once the bushy tailed vermin found their way down the tree. They wouldn't be able to pay, so they couldn't stay, no sirree. This was going to be the first of many Bubba Joe Incorp-o-rated Apartment buildings when he finished preparin' them for paying customers.
Raising the axe in the air, he let it swing hard and swift into one of the tree's many branches.
It was time to get rich.
8. LunaRei_SilverBlood
Quote:
Okay to there was a girl walking down the street eating an apple. And a tasty apple it was when she saw flames from a fire. Going to investigate she saw that the fire had trapped a cat. But it wasn't long before the cat was rescued through. To the girls relief. As she continued to walk she saw a tree. what a lovely tree it was.It made her wish she had her camera, it would have made a great background on her computer. But alas they lived in a city, full of tall buildings... It was then that she thought of getting an axe. Maybe cutting the tree down to bring home. What a crazy idea! She saw a ladder nearby and using it she climbed up the tree and picked a new apple.
9. Prince of Iran
Quote:
One day the prince of Persia woke up after being asleep for 2 years. As he rose from the ruins of Persepolis he remembered what had happened. It was the evil Alexander of Macedonia who had burnt down his city and everything he stood for, he had taken the prince pride and embarrassed him in front his people and country. The prince started walking around looking for any survivors but all he could find was a red white and green apple laying on the ground in the middle of the ruins. He picked up the apple and took a bite of it. He could feel that a fire inside of him had awakened. He knew what he had to do.
The prince started his journey to seek answers of how he should defeat Alexander. The prince arrived at the fire temple on Mount Khajeh were he saw the Mighty Haji Firouz being black as always with all the dirt in his face for keeping the fire in the temple until the new year arrives.
The prince asked Haji Firouz what he would do to free his people from the evil Alexander and Haji Firouz said:
“You are currently cat you must rise and become the lion of Persia!”
The prince knew inside him right then and there that for him to get back his land from Alexander he had to bring up the Persian cat power that exists inside every Persian. The prince thanked Haji Firouz for his wise words as he glided down the the mountain as the prince he is.
As the prince was gliding down the mountain he jumped out from the ledge and landed on the green magical grass of Susa. He could feel the cold breeze coming with the wind as his hair moved with the wind. The prince was now looking for the earth tree of Persia to meet the great earth god that gave him immortal life. As he arrived to where the earth tree was gone all he could see was black dust. He went up to the black dust and he could see something shiny under it. He removed the dust with his hand and what was under there was a Computer monitor. The prince with his superb intelligent he quickly learned to use this monitor and with the touch screen he searched on the search engine where Alexander currently where staying. The computer monitor showed a palace. The prince recognized the palace because it was one of his palaces that he had built in Babylon. The prince started running to the city of Babylon.
It took him 2 months to get to Babylon when he was finally there he stood outside the mighty gates and remembered when his father Cyrus the Great had conquered this city without even killing one innocent human being. He walked in to the city without the guards noticing him. He looked around and saw the huge buildings all around him. Then he saw him. It was Alexander the one who had taken everything from the prince. The prince looked at him as he walked in to the palace and followed him up there. He knew he needed a weapon to kill Alexander so he jumped on one of the guards and broke his neck. The guard’s body slowly fell down to the ground and the prince took his axe when the guard was laying the ground.
When he grabbed the axe he knew this was it. This was the moment he had been waiting for so long. He could finally bring down the man that had destroyed his empire and made his people to slaves. The prince went in to the palace as he entered Alexander saw him and was frightened to see that the prince survived the massacre of Persepolis. Alexander tried to grab his sword but before he knew it the prince cut of his head with the axe. The head rolled down the hall and he walked up to it and picked up his long lost crown. He put on his crown and walked up the ladder to the palace roof top to make an announcement to his people. When the people of Babylon saw that the son of Cyrus had returned they started cheering and celebrating that they had been freed from the evil of Alexander. The prince walked up on the edge and said:
“I am Dennis the great A Persian, son of a Persian, an Aryan, having Aryan lineage!”
The prince started his journey to seek answers of how he should defeat Alexander. The prince arrived at the fire temple on Mount Khajeh were he saw the Mighty Haji Firouz being black as always with all the dirt in his face for keeping the fire in the temple until the new year arrives.
The prince asked Haji Firouz what he would do to free his people from the evil Alexander and Haji Firouz said:
“You are currently cat you must rise and become the lion of Persia!”
The prince knew inside him right then and there that for him to get back his land from Alexander he had to bring up the Persian cat power that exists inside every Persian. The prince thanked Haji Firouz for his wise words as he glided down the the mountain as the prince he is.
As the prince was gliding down the mountain he jumped out from the ledge and landed on the green magical grass of Susa. He could feel the cold breeze coming with the wind as his hair moved with the wind. The prince was now looking for the earth tree of Persia to meet the great earth god that gave him immortal life. As he arrived to where the earth tree was gone all he could see was black dust. He went up to the black dust and he could see something shiny under it. He removed the dust with his hand and what was under there was a Computer monitor. The prince with his superb intelligent he quickly learned to use this monitor and with the touch screen he searched on the search engine where Alexander currently where staying. The computer monitor showed a palace. The prince recognized the palace because it was one of his palaces that he had built in Babylon. The prince started running to the city of Babylon.
It took him 2 months to get to Babylon when he was finally there he stood outside the mighty gates and remembered when his father Cyrus the Great had conquered this city without even killing one innocent human being. He walked in to the city without the guards noticing him. He looked around and saw the huge buildings all around him. Then he saw him. It was Alexander the one who had taken everything from the prince. The prince looked at him as he walked in to the palace and followed him up there. He knew he needed a weapon to kill Alexander so he jumped on one of the guards and broke his neck. The guard’s body slowly fell down to the ground and the prince took his axe when the guard was laying the ground.
When he grabbed the axe he knew this was it. This was the moment he had been waiting for so long. He could finally bring down the man that had destroyed his empire and made his people to slaves. The prince went in to the palace as he entered Alexander saw him and was frightened to see that the prince survived the massacre of Persepolis. Alexander tried to grab his sword but before he knew it the prince cut of his head with the axe. The head rolled down the hall and he walked up to it and picked up his long lost crown. He put on his crown and walked up the ladder to the palace roof top to make an announcement to his people. When the people of Babylon saw that the son of Cyrus had returned they started cheering and celebrating that they had been freed from the evil of Alexander. The prince walked up on the edge and said:
“I am Dennis the great A Persian, son of a Persian, an Aryan, having Aryan lineage!”
10. Miroke
Quote:
"Ok, Ok, because you begged, I will tell you the story of how I came to own a 3 million dollar cat. Ok, so so far the day started out crappy, I was late and I was munching on a apple for breakfast on the run. I took a shortcut so I wouldn't be in too much trouble. So as I round this corner I find, A HOUSE ON FIRE! I was like 'WTF mate' but I see a cat in a window, and I would hate myself and become emo if I let this cat die. So as if Jesus himself spoke to me, I knew what to do. I saw this tree next to the house that had miraculously not caught on fire. So I climbed up the tree and reached, and reached and snagged the cat along with some new manly scratches. I somehow manage to get down from the damnded Jesus tree, and run back home with a brand new cat (I named him Ferdinand ). But I had never had a cat before (and technically they weren't allowed in the complex, but whatever) so I start looking up cat facts, and how to take care of cats and stuff into the wee hours in the morning (There is a lot of freaking cat stuff out there FYI) but then like at the crack of dawn someone starts banging on the door. So I yell,"Who pissed in your cornflakes? Calm the hell down, I'm coming." I think it made them madder, I'm not sure, but they did start chopping my door down with an axe. So I snagged Ferdy and we hightailed it to my window. Luckily, after the whole fire incident I carry a fold away ladder in my pocket. So I unfolded it and flew into the sunset with Ferdy, but we went down the ladder first of course. But they kinda followed us, so I ran and ran until I magically came upon the Jesus tree again, so I climbed up the bad boy and then they screamed at me to give back their 3 million dollar cat. And I was like, 'HOLY CARP, this is a 3 million dollar cat???' and they were like 'YES that is a 3 million dollar cat.' and I was like 'Are you sure this a 3 million dollar cat.' and they were like 'Ya, I am pretty damn sure I chased you all over hell and back for that damned 3 million dollar cat.' so I was like 'What if it isn't the 3 million dollar cat?' and they were like "I would proceed to rip out"-
"SHUT THE HELL UP WITH THE MOTHER FREAKING 3 MILLION DOLLAR CAT STUFF"
"Fine, no need to be snippy, ANYWAYS, before I was so ru_-
"GET ON WITH IT"
"FINE, ok so Jesus smote them all and we lived happily ever after. The end."
"....."
"Umm, your cat is a girl"
"SHUT THE HELL UP WITH THE MOTHER FREAKING 3 MILLION DOLLAR CAT STUFF"
"Fine, no need to be snippy, ANYWAYS, before I was so ru_-
"GET ON WITH IT"
"FINE, ok so Jesus smote them all and we lived happily ever after. The end."
"....."
"Umm, your cat is a girl"
11. Teh Zan
Quote:
It began as most stories begin, on an ordinary day in an ordinary time, in an ordinary room. That was how all these things began, and that was how you knew that something was simply bound to go wrong. It was almost as if bad luck was utterly attracted to normality. I'm sure that if they could have, Normal would have married Bad Luck just for the novelty of it. But you see, I'm not concerned with any of that. In this normal room in my normal house, I was a just a kid who knew that things like that only happen in stories. And this certainly isn't a story. Well, if I had known back then what I know now, I would've told you something different. The truth is, it wasn't a story. Key word being 'wasn't', but now it is. It's almost like I fell down the rabbit hole that ordinary day.
Come to think of it, the day didn't start any different from the others either. I left that ordinary room of mine to trudge downstairs into my boring kitchen for a bite of breakfast. I was the sort of person who never had much taste for sweets in the morning; I preferred fruit. Today's fruit, so kindly bought by my mother, was an apple. Juicy and bright shining red, it sat in the fruit bowl awaiting it's clever demise. Grabbing my bag and heading out for my destination, I lifted the fruit to my mouth, about to take a bite, when something caught my nose. Lifting my head, I inhaled what could be nothing less than smoke from a fire. So much for ordinary! Already strange things were happening. My nose led me to glance at the alleyway where right across from me, a pile of garbage had burst into flame and was issuing billows upon billows of smoke.
Well, it wasn't my problem, and so I turned to walk away. I didn't need to have any involvement in silly little mishaps like this. Besides, I would be late if I stopped now. Unfortunately for me... I was going to be late no matter what, because at that very moment something came barreling out at me from that very alleyway. Tragic luck was already worsening in it's resolve. I had the distinct feeling I should have skipped school today and stayed in bed, especially after what I saw.
The thing that came at me wasn't any 'ordinary' kind of thing. It was a cat. And here I roll my eyes because as we all know, cats are about as normal as you can get, and I don't say this sarcastically. It's true. They're lazy and predictable, so it naturally surprised me when this one clawed it's way up my bag to my shoulder and perched there like a parrot, looking like king (or queen) of the world. What was even worse was when it purred right in my ear, and instead of hearing that catty sound, I heard laughing.
Now, I tell you, I'm not crazy. I've lived a normal fourteen years in this town and not once has anything strange happened to me. I never believed in silly fantasies and for my age I was always rather practical, but this was insane. This was really goddamn insane! And for the first time in my life, I felt like I was crazy. What happened? Well if you're still reading this, I'm sure you already know. Yes. You're absolutely correct.
It spoke. The cat spoke.
"Could you help me?" purred the cat in a voice that I swore to always be giggling in some far part of it.
So, here I was, standing on the sidewalk, with a cat on my shoulder, and it was trying to talk to me. What did I do? I kept walking. This had to be a daydream, it absolutely couldn't be real. Things like this just didn't happen. But the cat had other things in mind for me, such as clawing into my shoulder and hissing at me. Well at that point I decided two things. One, it was a real cat. Two, I didn't want it on my shoulder. Best thing to do? Pull it off! Great idea right? Hah. Wrong. Worst idea ever. As I try to lift the cat, gently mind you, off my shoulder, it digs right in deeper, leaving a mark and causing blood to stain my clean beige shirt. That's just great.
Wincing, I decided that this had to be a dream, and in dreams, cats could talk. So if conversing with it would get it off, then I should do it. "What do you want?"
"I need your help," the cat crooned, relaxing a little again and licking it's paws of the fresh blood. My blood.
"Yes I know that, but with what?"
"Oh, do you know about the tree Yggdrasil?"
Great, more insane myths to add to my already terrible day. I searched my brain, but couldn't quite come up with anything that reminded me of that word, or tree, or whatever it was! So I shook my head, half-hoping the motion would knock the crazy cat off. No such luck.
"Where I come from, Yggdrasil takes care of all of us. It is the great life tree, and it is in danger. Someone evil," and the cat muttered this word as if it was the worst curse in all the world, "is trying to cut the tree up and turn it into a bunch of magical wooden carvings!"
What was this? A comedy routine? Wooden carvings. You're kidding right? No. I'm not. This cat that, let me remind you, clawed into my shoulder, was absolutely serious. Someone, or something, was trying to carve into the great Eggnasal , or whatever. And so I said the most logical thing I could think of: "So what do you want from me? And don't say help..."
I'm sure that if the cat could, it would've thrown a hissy fit (no pun intended.) But after that I sort of stopped caring about it and went on my way before it tugged on my hair most violently. It was pulling me back to the large apartment building I lived in, back to my room and into my chair at my desk. Don't ask how it managed to do this, I barely understand myself. What's even more surprising, was that shortly after this shock, it turned on my computer and sat in my lap typing something. Dumbfounded, I tried to take this opportunity to shove it off of me. But it was smart, and had clawed it's back leg into my trousers. Well that was a failure. The score was now, cat two, me zero.
It tapped the screen with it's paw, "Look."
So I looked, and what I saw was amazing. It was a giant field filled with cats of all shapes, colors, sizes, and species. The sky was a bright blue and the grass a perfect green, like the sort only found in movies. But the greatest thing of all was the giant gnarly tree in the middle of the entire thing. It's boughs extended across most of the plain. I leaned in and almost bumped my nose into the glass screen. But as I leaned in closer and closer, I found that my face never actually met that screen. Instead... I found that I was suddenly falling.
Limbs flailing, I landed in a giant batch of flowers. And I swear I'm not lying; I had just fallen into my computer. As I looked up, I could see the screen and my room staring down at me but it was too far too reach. I could barely catch the glimpse of my room window, where the sun was high in the sky and people's laundry was out to dry in the afternoon breeze. Where tenant building after tenant building was lined up in the neat little rows my town was made of.
Looking around wildly for that darn cat, I stood up and angrily brushed myself of flowers. It was sitting calmly only a foot away, cleaning itself. I lunged for it, and it dodged neatly. If you can't tell, I was nearly fed up with all of this. Exploding garbage, talking cat, falling into a computer screen, my day was royally screwed by now, and so I had nothing to lose for getting a bit of revenge on the cat, be this a dream or not.
"I'll take you home after you help us," it said calmly.
"Take me home now! This is insane!"
"Humans are so oblivious," sighed the cat and began to walk away. When I didn't follow, it looked back at me, "Well? Come on!"
I could be stubborn and sit there, but something in me told me it would be a better idea to follow the cat, "So where's the evil dude?"
"Huh?"
"The guy trying to turn Yggdrasil into a wood carving?"
It looked at me stupidly for a second, before it's eyes widened in realization, "Oh that! I lied. I just wanted you to come here because no one else can reach it..."
Great. As if things couldn't get any worse. The cat had lied to me! "Reach what?" I asked, barely restraining my anger at this point.
It seems as we were talking, we reached the base of the tree where a multitude of cats where gathered around some strange object at the base of a ladder too short to reach any branches, especially if you were a cat. And if my cat had heard my question, it ignored me and said something completely different...
"The other day Yggdrasil dropped this from the sky and told us to use it shake her branches for food. But none of us may lift it, and none may climb the ladder, and so we decided to go to the Other Side and get one of you to do it for us!"
Selfish cats.
"You want me... to climb a tree, and shake something down?" I raised my eyebrow. I had been inconvenienced for this? "No way, I'm going home," and I turned around with all intentions of figuring out how to get home by myself. It was then that my legs felt sluggish and heavy and I looked down to see a pile of cats clawing into my trousers. I sighed, "Fine, give me the object..." And I held out my hand for something while five or so cats lifted an axe off the ground and put the handle into my hand. I staggered forward, staring at it. The blade was a clean silver, almost glowing around the edges, and the axe's handle had wood as smooth as silk. From the bottom dangled two leaves of varying colors and I knew that this was no ordinary object.
And so, in a rather anticlimactic moment, I climbed the ladder and as best I could, smacked the axe against the nearest branch. The sound rang like a gong and resounded throughout the area. Shortly after that, a million apples fell from the tree, and I fell off the ladder. Apples. Apples. I had to go through all of this... for apples.
"-ake up! Wake up! You're going to be late for school!"
With a hard thud, I felt something hit my cheek and I stirred. You think I'm crazy, I bet you do. But this is really what happened... I woke up in my bed, still in my pajamas with an apple rolling into my lap. My older sister was standing in the doorway, she rolled her eyes and left as I took the apple into my hand. With a grimace I wondered if everything had just been a dream? It had to have been... talking cats? Hah!
It was then, when I got out of bed, that I noticed I was wearing shredded trouser pants and that my shoulder had blood spots on it. No way! But it's true... and when I looked at the apple in my hand, it looked shinier than usual. Quickly, I opened my window and tossed it out.
It was then that I decided... I would never eat apples again.
Come to think of it, the day didn't start any different from the others either. I left that ordinary room of mine to trudge downstairs into my boring kitchen for a bite of breakfast. I was the sort of person who never had much taste for sweets in the morning; I preferred fruit. Today's fruit, so kindly bought by my mother, was an apple. Juicy and bright shining red, it sat in the fruit bowl awaiting it's clever demise. Grabbing my bag and heading out for my destination, I lifted the fruit to my mouth, about to take a bite, when something caught my nose. Lifting my head, I inhaled what could be nothing less than smoke from a fire. So much for ordinary! Already strange things were happening. My nose led me to glance at the alleyway where right across from me, a pile of garbage had burst into flame and was issuing billows upon billows of smoke.
Well, it wasn't my problem, and so I turned to walk away. I didn't need to have any involvement in silly little mishaps like this. Besides, I would be late if I stopped now. Unfortunately for me... I was going to be late no matter what, because at that very moment something came barreling out at me from that very alleyway. Tragic luck was already worsening in it's resolve. I had the distinct feeling I should have skipped school today and stayed in bed, especially after what I saw.
The thing that came at me wasn't any 'ordinary' kind of thing. It was a cat. And here I roll my eyes because as we all know, cats are about as normal as you can get, and I don't say this sarcastically. It's true. They're lazy and predictable, so it naturally surprised me when this one clawed it's way up my bag to my shoulder and perched there like a parrot, looking like king (or queen) of the world. What was even worse was when it purred right in my ear, and instead of hearing that catty sound, I heard laughing.
Now, I tell you, I'm not crazy. I've lived a normal fourteen years in this town and not once has anything strange happened to me. I never believed in silly fantasies and for my age I was always rather practical, but this was insane. This was really goddamn insane! And for the first time in my life, I felt like I was crazy. What happened? Well if you're still reading this, I'm sure you already know. Yes. You're absolutely correct.
It spoke. The cat spoke.
"Could you help me?" purred the cat in a voice that I swore to always be giggling in some far part of it.
So, here I was, standing on the sidewalk, with a cat on my shoulder, and it was trying to talk to me. What did I do? I kept walking. This had to be a daydream, it absolutely couldn't be real. Things like this just didn't happen. But the cat had other things in mind for me, such as clawing into my shoulder and hissing at me. Well at that point I decided two things. One, it was a real cat. Two, I didn't want it on my shoulder. Best thing to do? Pull it off! Great idea right? Hah. Wrong. Worst idea ever. As I try to lift the cat, gently mind you, off my shoulder, it digs right in deeper, leaving a mark and causing blood to stain my clean beige shirt. That's just great.
Wincing, I decided that this had to be a dream, and in dreams, cats could talk. So if conversing with it would get it off, then I should do it. "What do you want?"
"I need your help," the cat crooned, relaxing a little again and licking it's paws of the fresh blood. My blood.
"Yes I know that, but with what?"
"Oh, do you know about the tree Yggdrasil?"
Great, more insane myths to add to my already terrible day. I searched my brain, but couldn't quite come up with anything that reminded me of that word, or tree, or whatever it was! So I shook my head, half-hoping the motion would knock the crazy cat off. No such luck.
"Where I come from, Yggdrasil takes care of all of us. It is the great life tree, and it is in danger. Someone evil," and the cat muttered this word as if it was the worst curse in all the world, "is trying to cut the tree up and turn it into a bunch of magical wooden carvings!"
What was this? A comedy routine? Wooden carvings. You're kidding right? No. I'm not. This cat that, let me remind you, clawed into my shoulder, was absolutely serious. Someone, or something, was trying to carve into the great Eggnasal , or whatever. And so I said the most logical thing I could think of: "So what do you want from me? And don't say help..."
I'm sure that if the cat could, it would've thrown a hissy fit (no pun intended.) But after that I sort of stopped caring about it and went on my way before it tugged on my hair most violently. It was pulling me back to the large apartment building I lived in, back to my room and into my chair at my desk. Don't ask how it managed to do this, I barely understand myself. What's even more surprising, was that shortly after this shock, it turned on my computer and sat in my lap typing something. Dumbfounded, I tried to take this opportunity to shove it off of me. But it was smart, and had clawed it's back leg into my trousers. Well that was a failure. The score was now, cat two, me zero.
It tapped the screen with it's paw, "Look."
So I looked, and what I saw was amazing. It was a giant field filled with cats of all shapes, colors, sizes, and species. The sky was a bright blue and the grass a perfect green, like the sort only found in movies. But the greatest thing of all was the giant gnarly tree in the middle of the entire thing. It's boughs extended across most of the plain. I leaned in and almost bumped my nose into the glass screen. But as I leaned in closer and closer, I found that my face never actually met that screen. Instead... I found that I was suddenly falling.
Limbs flailing, I landed in a giant batch of flowers. And I swear I'm not lying; I had just fallen into my computer. As I looked up, I could see the screen and my room staring down at me but it was too far too reach. I could barely catch the glimpse of my room window, where the sun was high in the sky and people's laundry was out to dry in the afternoon breeze. Where tenant building after tenant building was lined up in the neat little rows my town was made of.
Looking around wildly for that darn cat, I stood up and angrily brushed myself of flowers. It was sitting calmly only a foot away, cleaning itself. I lunged for it, and it dodged neatly. If you can't tell, I was nearly fed up with all of this. Exploding garbage, talking cat, falling into a computer screen, my day was royally screwed by now, and so I had nothing to lose for getting a bit of revenge on the cat, be this a dream or not.
"I'll take you home after you help us," it said calmly.
"Take me home now! This is insane!"
"Humans are so oblivious," sighed the cat and began to walk away. When I didn't follow, it looked back at me, "Well? Come on!"
I could be stubborn and sit there, but something in me told me it would be a better idea to follow the cat, "So where's the evil dude?"
"Huh?"
"The guy trying to turn Yggdrasil into a wood carving?"
It looked at me stupidly for a second, before it's eyes widened in realization, "Oh that! I lied. I just wanted you to come here because no one else can reach it..."
Great. As if things couldn't get any worse. The cat had lied to me! "Reach what?" I asked, barely restraining my anger at this point.
It seems as we were talking, we reached the base of the tree where a multitude of cats where gathered around some strange object at the base of a ladder too short to reach any branches, especially if you were a cat. And if my cat had heard my question, it ignored me and said something completely different...
"The other day Yggdrasil dropped this from the sky and told us to use it shake her branches for food. But none of us may lift it, and none may climb the ladder, and so we decided to go to the Other Side and get one of you to do it for us!"
Selfish cats.
"You want me... to climb a tree, and shake something down?" I raised my eyebrow. I had been inconvenienced for this? "No way, I'm going home," and I turned around with all intentions of figuring out how to get home by myself. It was then that my legs felt sluggish and heavy and I looked down to see a pile of cats clawing into my trousers. I sighed, "Fine, give me the object..." And I held out my hand for something while five or so cats lifted an axe off the ground and put the handle into my hand. I staggered forward, staring at it. The blade was a clean silver, almost glowing around the edges, and the axe's handle had wood as smooth as silk. From the bottom dangled two leaves of varying colors and I knew that this was no ordinary object.
And so, in a rather anticlimactic moment, I climbed the ladder and as best I could, smacked the axe against the nearest branch. The sound rang like a gong and resounded throughout the area. Shortly after that, a million apples fell from the tree, and I fell off the ladder. Apples. Apples. I had to go through all of this... for apples.
"-ake up! Wake up! You're going to be late for school!"
With a hard thud, I felt something hit my cheek and I stirred. You think I'm crazy, I bet you do. But this is really what happened... I woke up in my bed, still in my pajamas with an apple rolling into my lap. My older sister was standing in the doorway, she rolled her eyes and left as I took the apple into my hand. With a grimace I wondered if everything had just been a dream? It had to have been... talking cats? Hah!
It was then, when I got out of bed, that I noticed I was wearing shredded trouser pants and that my shoulder had blood spots on it. No way! But it's true... and when I looked at the apple in my hand, it looked shinier than usual. Quickly, I opened my window and tossed it out.
It was then that I decided... I would never eat apples again.
12. [Eskimo]
Quote:
It all started one morning when I was eating an apple.
I always had an apple for breakfast every day. It was normal, just like everything else I did after breakfast. Only this time, once I'd finished eating the apple, the core slipped out of my hand. It surprised me and I jerked my hands out to catch it. As I moved my hands, flames shot out of my palms and disintegrated the apple core.
I stumbled backward, gasping, tripped over my chair, and fell flat on my butt. I sat there like an idiot for several minutes, just sitting there, staring with my mouth open.
It took a long time of gaping and wondering before I finally decided to try and forget it had ever happened. I'd just go on with my day like normal. Maybe it had been a hallucination? But things only got weirder.
My cat Sophie came and stood beside me, tail bent in the air as she smiled at me, like she always did. Only this time, she...Spoke.
"Your powers have finally awakened, my lady." she said. Her voice was crystal-clear. It wasn't a normal voice. But I guess that was because it was a cat voice...But what the hell, my cat was talking. Why was I wondering about her voice?
"WHAT THE HELL?" I screamed. I stood up and slammed my back into the wall behind me. Sophie began to curl around my legs.
"But as your powers awaken, so does He. This world will be in peril very soon." she said solemnly.
"What are you TALKING about? I mean--Why are you even TALKING?" I wheezed. I swallowed some spit wrong and had a coughing fit.
"The Prince of Shadows, my lady." Sophie replied, staring up at me. She didn't pay attention to the fact that I was practically coughing up a lung. "You used your life to seal him away. But now that you have been reborn and your powers have returned, and the seal upon my voice has been released, I'm sure the seal has been removed from him." she explained. Her ears flattened against her head. "He will come for your life, my lady."
"Okay...Okay...This is happening." I mumbled to myself. I rubbed my hands over my face and tried to accept the fact that it wasn't a dream and I wasn't hallucinating. "Why does he want to kill me?"
"It is a very long story, my lady. Perhaps I will tell it another day. But for now, you must work hard so that you are prepared when he comes to slay you." I winced at the word "slay".
"So what do I do?" I asked.
"Come with me to the Sacred Tree. Its powers will help you to control your own. Once there, we will train." she said. So, I followed her out of the house and to this Sacred Tree, wherever it was. Turns out it was in my backyard.
I'll spare you the details of my training. It was just...Training. Heh. But by the end of the day, I had learned how to control my powers, aim and shoot things and burn them up, and how to use huge blasts of fire or small spurts. I also learned that I could summon things, but I didn't learn how to do that just then. That was for another day, Sophie said. I also learned that Sophie had been my caretaker in my "past life" or whatever.
For the following days, I trained, trained, and trained some more. I tried my hand at summoning, but it didn't work out. I came to terms with my new life and was actually enjoying myself more than I ever had in the past.
One day, I decided not to train and just relax. I sat down at my PC and browsed the internet, looking at Lolcats and stuff. After a few minutes, there was a black-out. I looked out the window at the apartment buildings around me. All their lights were on. It was only my house that was out. I glanced down at Sophie, who had been sleeping at my feet a moment ago, and I saw that she was now wide-awake. Her pupils were slits and the hair was shooting up along her back. I knew something wasn't right.
I walked out of the PC room and into the hallway. Sophie followed me closely. My adrenaline was pumping and my fists were clenching and un-clenching. During one of these clenches, my right hand closed on something solid. I freaked out for a second and looked down. There was now some kind of little axe in my hand. Somehow, it looked familiar. I didn't have time to be proud of myself for summoning my first thing. That guy might've been there and I was getting pretty scared. I didn't want to be "slayed"...
I moved through all the rooms in my house, but there was nothing out of the ordinary in any of them. So I opened the front door and went outside. I stepped over the mantle and turned to face my house. Nothing suspicious was there. I decided to walk the perimeter of my house to make sure all was well. I walked around the right side, came to the back side, walked under a ladder...
...A ladder?
I turned around, heart leaping to my throat. Not for fear of bad luck, no...But because I hadn't put a ladder up against the back of my house. Heck, I didn't even OWN a ladder.
My eyes followed the length of the ladder until they reached the roof. My eyes widened and I held my breath at what I saw.
Two blue eyes, a mess of black hair, and a psychotic grin. A young man was staring down at me.
I saw a blur of motion.
I raised my axe in defense and prepared flames in my left palm.
I always had an apple for breakfast every day. It was normal, just like everything else I did after breakfast. Only this time, once I'd finished eating the apple, the core slipped out of my hand. It surprised me and I jerked my hands out to catch it. As I moved my hands, flames shot out of my palms and disintegrated the apple core.
I stumbled backward, gasping, tripped over my chair, and fell flat on my butt. I sat there like an idiot for several minutes, just sitting there, staring with my mouth open.
It took a long time of gaping and wondering before I finally decided to try and forget it had ever happened. I'd just go on with my day like normal. Maybe it had been a hallucination? But things only got weirder.
My cat Sophie came and stood beside me, tail bent in the air as she smiled at me, like she always did. Only this time, she...Spoke.
"Your powers have finally awakened, my lady." she said. Her voice was crystal-clear. It wasn't a normal voice. But I guess that was because it was a cat voice...But what the hell, my cat was talking. Why was I wondering about her voice?
"WHAT THE HELL?" I screamed. I stood up and slammed my back into the wall behind me. Sophie began to curl around my legs.
"But as your powers awaken, so does He. This world will be in peril very soon." she said solemnly.
"What are you TALKING about? I mean--Why are you even TALKING?" I wheezed. I swallowed some spit wrong and had a coughing fit.
"The Prince of Shadows, my lady." Sophie replied, staring up at me. She didn't pay attention to the fact that I was practically coughing up a lung. "You used your life to seal him away. But now that you have been reborn and your powers have returned, and the seal upon my voice has been released, I'm sure the seal has been removed from him." she explained. Her ears flattened against her head. "He will come for your life, my lady."
"Okay...Okay...This is happening." I mumbled to myself. I rubbed my hands over my face and tried to accept the fact that it wasn't a dream and I wasn't hallucinating. "Why does he want to kill me?"
"It is a very long story, my lady. Perhaps I will tell it another day. But for now, you must work hard so that you are prepared when he comes to slay you." I winced at the word "slay".
"So what do I do?" I asked.
"Come with me to the Sacred Tree. Its powers will help you to control your own. Once there, we will train." she said. So, I followed her out of the house and to this Sacred Tree, wherever it was. Turns out it was in my backyard.
I'll spare you the details of my training. It was just...Training. Heh. But by the end of the day, I had learned how to control my powers, aim and shoot things and burn them up, and how to use huge blasts of fire or small spurts. I also learned that I could summon things, but I didn't learn how to do that just then. That was for another day, Sophie said. I also learned that Sophie had been my caretaker in my "past life" or whatever.
For the following days, I trained, trained, and trained some more. I tried my hand at summoning, but it didn't work out. I came to terms with my new life and was actually enjoying myself more than I ever had in the past.
One day, I decided not to train and just relax. I sat down at my PC and browsed the internet, looking at Lolcats and stuff. After a few minutes, there was a black-out. I looked out the window at the apartment buildings around me. All their lights were on. It was only my house that was out. I glanced down at Sophie, who had been sleeping at my feet a moment ago, and I saw that she was now wide-awake. Her pupils were slits and the hair was shooting up along her back. I knew something wasn't right.
I walked out of the PC room and into the hallway. Sophie followed me closely. My adrenaline was pumping and my fists were clenching and un-clenching. During one of these clenches, my right hand closed on something solid. I freaked out for a second and looked down. There was now some kind of little axe in my hand. Somehow, it looked familiar. I didn't have time to be proud of myself for summoning my first thing. That guy might've been there and I was getting pretty scared. I didn't want to be "slayed"...
I moved through all the rooms in my house, but there was nothing out of the ordinary in any of them. So I opened the front door and went outside. I stepped over the mantle and turned to face my house. Nothing suspicious was there. I decided to walk the perimeter of my house to make sure all was well. I walked around the right side, came to the back side, walked under a ladder...
...A ladder?
I turned around, heart leaping to my throat. Not for fear of bad luck, no...But because I hadn't put a ladder up against the back of my house. Heck, I didn't even OWN a ladder.
My eyes followed the length of the ladder until they reached the roof. My eyes widened and I held my breath at what I saw.
Two blue eyes, a mess of black hair, and a psychotic grin. A young man was staring down at me.
I saw a blur of motion.
I raised my axe in defense and prepared flames in my left palm.
13. vegeta_nathan13
Quote:
There was a green apple on the ground. When a fire monster came by and ate the apple in one bite. A cat came by and saw the monster. The cat went up to the monster, but the monster gobbled up the cat. The monster spit out the bones and burried them by a tree. The monster wentwalking and stumbled on to a junkyard. In the junkyard he found a broken computer. He touched it and it combusted into flames. Next to the junkyard was a building and inside he found an axe. He went outside and saw a fireman on a ladder. He went to the ladder and started chopping at it. The fireman fell to his death and the monster ate him. The End
14. Bouncy_Pineapple
Quote:
There was once a woman who cooked delicious apples with a fire. Everyone loved them but they only loved her for her cooking skills, and didn't regard her much as a friend. The only being that truely loved her was her pet cat.
One day, the cat got stuck in a apple tree and couldn't get out. The woman was frustrated, since she was old and wasn't supple enough to climb it and get the cat. But she tried so anyway, and fell off the tree and hurt her back. She slipped into unconciousness, though the last thing she saw was her cat back on the ground safely, and running off somewhere...
When she woke up, she was in someone's room. The room didn't have a lot of furniture in it, only a bed she was laying on, and a desk with a computer on it. She glanced around to try and get a sense as to where she was, and her eyes fell on a window. It revealed that she was in the city, which was a long way from her house and place of accident. The women, out of shock, twisted out of bed and groaned as her already injured back hit the ground. Immediately, a young man entered the room with a hatchet.
"Are you ok?" He asked, hovering above her like a mother goose over a hatchling. The old women would've nodded if it wasn't for the weapon he was holding.
"Oh this? It's a bad neighborhood here, people trying to break in and stuff. They aren't below to beating old ladies up either. I never used it on anyone, but it scares people enough to not try and commit any crimes here. Though there was this one instance where some guy with a ladder tried to climb into my window, and I hacked it to bits after he was arrested and sent to jail."
She stared wide-eyed at the man, not knowing what to say. Finally, she spoke up.
"Why did you help me? I'm just an elderly woman that cooks apples."
He smiled a bit as he said his response. "Not just that. When your cat came in looking for me, I knew you were in trouble. Serious trouble."
"My cat?" She said like she couldn't believe it.
"Yeah. Your cat knew that your son lived in the nearby city, and that he would be the only one that cared enough to help you."
One day, the cat got stuck in a apple tree and couldn't get out. The woman was frustrated, since she was old and wasn't supple enough to climb it and get the cat. But she tried so anyway, and fell off the tree and hurt her back. She slipped into unconciousness, though the last thing she saw was her cat back on the ground safely, and running off somewhere...
When she woke up, she was in someone's room. The room didn't have a lot of furniture in it, only a bed she was laying on, and a desk with a computer on it. She glanced around to try and get a sense as to where she was, and her eyes fell on a window. It revealed that she was in the city, which was a long way from her house and place of accident. The women, out of shock, twisted out of bed and groaned as her already injured back hit the ground. Immediately, a young man entered the room with a hatchet.
"Are you ok?" He asked, hovering above her like a mother goose over a hatchling. The old women would've nodded if it wasn't for the weapon he was holding.
"Oh this? It's a bad neighborhood here, people trying to break in and stuff. They aren't below to beating old ladies up either. I never used it on anyone, but it scares people enough to not try and commit any crimes here. Though there was this one instance where some guy with a ladder tried to climb into my window, and I hacked it to bits after he was arrested and sent to jail."
She stared wide-eyed at the man, not knowing what to say. Finally, she spoke up.
"Why did you help me? I'm just an elderly woman that cooks apples."
He smiled a bit as he said his response. "Not just that. When your cat came in looking for me, I knew you were in trouble. Serious trouble."
"My cat?" She said like she couldn't believe it.
"Yeah. Your cat knew that your son lived in the nearby city, and that he would be the only one that cared enough to help you."
15. Lilblkrose
Quote:
An apple. My only and last food supple from home of which I escaped from. How I wish I was by a fire, to warm myself against its blazing heat. While I was daydreaming of such warmth, I ended up eating all the apple to the core. Disappointed at myself for my unconscious action of hunger, a cat appeared in front of me. I stared at it for a while, as if a staring contest. It looked as it belonged to someone. It started to run off, leaving me alone.. but it stopped, staring back at me. My thoughts wonder if it wanted me to follow it. So I did, as I had no where to go. Following, through narrow paths and over walls, I wonder why was I willed so to follow. The trailed stop when it ran up a tree, meowing back at me from on top. Seeing there is no point in continuing, I realized I was in front of an old apartment. The doors were open and decided to look around to see if I can seek shelter here. Up the stairs looking through all the room that looked full of disease and mold, I found a room that looked cozy and wide room but it had a computer inside. It looked fairly new compared to everything in the room.. Curiosity has brought me to this place, I might as well investigate the computer. The setting sun was looming in from the windows, it was getting late but that did not matter to me no more. I don't have a bedtime now. Turning on the computer, starting it up, a shock ran through me. The desktop wallpaper were pictures. Pictures of chopped up body part. I was at the point to puking and turned around until I saw an axe.. shining in front of my face. A man behind me was holding an axe that was shined of blood compared to the man. He took a swing but I ducked and ran to the exit. The knob was jammed and I was trapped, quickly I looked around the room as the man approached me. An open window, do I dare jump? As I dash to the window, a ladder dropped from below me. Firemen and police, thank god! The mad man came at me in full throttle, and quickly climbed and slide down the ladder as quickly I could as the firemen helped me down. The mad man was caught by the police. Why were they there, and why was I there they wondered? A long story I told them and their reason didn't matter to me, I was glad I made it out alive. Before driving off back home, I look back at the tree, where the old cat was still sitting on. Meowing good-bye.
16. Count Cupcake
Quote:
“Don’t jump! We’re coming to get you!”
Absently, I watched my family panicking below. By now they had enlisted the aid of countless neighbors and a pack of curious pedestrians. Quite a crowd had assembled to rescue me.
“Just hang in there, Martin!”
Martin. That’s me. I am solitary, fickle, and colorblind. Perhaps I am also blind to the feelings of others? How else could I find amusement in observing the ones I love scampering beneath me like headless ants? I only wish that I did not see the world in shades of grey; my “mother’s” face was so flushed that her scarlet hue probably would rival that of an apple or rose.
They say that when you are at a nauseatingly dangerous height, your life flashes before your eyes. In my case, several lives came to mind: those of my ancestors. The first one to arrive in the Americas made a journey across the Atlantic to a Puritan community called Salem. The place, a thriving Massachusetts colony, was teeming with propriety. Naturally, as with every society obsessed with fulfilling social norms, it was also wracked with corruption. The citizens there became consumed by jealousy and superstition and turned on each other. Anyone accused of ‘witchcraft’ would be deprived of a trial. He or she would be strapped to a stake and burned alive along with any black feline. Luckily, my great great great (and then some) grandmother escaped unscathed .
She and a handful of later generations made their home in a small farm on a grassy hill with a sprawling live oak in the countryside of Virginia. I suppose they were reasonably happy there –until the Civil War struck. My relatives had little interest in the conflict, but the world around them plunged into violence. Half of their friends snuck across the border to join the blue coats and the other half stayed behind, waiting to slaughter the very people they had grown up with. Hoping to escape such madness, my ancestors fled south to Atlanta. When Sherman razed the city, they retreated even further into Alabama.
When the war subsided, they settled in Birmingham and endured the tumultuous politics of Reconstruction. Luckily, things soon smoothed over and they once again were able to claim peace. It was not until the 1960s, during the Civil Right’s movement, that society’s weakness once again threatened them. My kin, true to form, continued to act impartial; they did not discriminate against race. However, they could not ignore the terrorism pervading their town. Everyday news of more arson and beatings flashed across the television screen. Their neighborhood was no longer safe because a handful of powerful, rash, prejudiced men wanted to axe unequal rights.
I sighed as my flashback ended. For me, humanity was depressing. I’m not really the one who sees the world in black and white, am I? I thought to myself as I rose to my paws and stretched. I wondered idly how long it would take for someone below to find a taller ladder or climb my tree. Maybe then they could finally view the world from an animal’s point of view.
Absently, I watched my family panicking below. By now they had enlisted the aid of countless neighbors and a pack of curious pedestrians. Quite a crowd had assembled to rescue me.
“Just hang in there, Martin!”
Martin. That’s me. I am solitary, fickle, and colorblind. Perhaps I am also blind to the feelings of others? How else could I find amusement in observing the ones I love scampering beneath me like headless ants? I only wish that I did not see the world in shades of grey; my “mother’s” face was so flushed that her scarlet hue probably would rival that of an apple or rose.
They say that when you are at a nauseatingly dangerous height, your life flashes before your eyes. In my case, several lives came to mind: those of my ancestors. The first one to arrive in the Americas made a journey across the Atlantic to a Puritan community called Salem. The place, a thriving Massachusetts colony, was teeming with propriety. Naturally, as with every society obsessed with fulfilling social norms, it was also wracked with corruption. The citizens there became consumed by jealousy and superstition and turned on each other. Anyone accused of ‘witchcraft’ would be deprived of a trial. He or she would be strapped to a stake and burned alive along with any black feline. Luckily, my great great great (and then some) grandmother escaped unscathed .
She and a handful of later generations made their home in a small farm on a grassy hill with a sprawling live oak in the countryside of Virginia. I suppose they were reasonably happy there –until the Civil War struck. My relatives had little interest in the conflict, but the world around them plunged into violence. Half of their friends snuck across the border to join the blue coats and the other half stayed behind, waiting to slaughter the very people they had grown up with. Hoping to escape such madness, my ancestors fled south to Atlanta. When Sherman razed the city, they retreated even further into Alabama.
When the war subsided, they settled in Birmingham and endured the tumultuous politics of Reconstruction. Luckily, things soon smoothed over and they once again were able to claim peace. It was not until the 1960s, during the Civil Right’s movement, that society’s weakness once again threatened them. My kin, true to form, continued to act impartial; they did not discriminate against race. However, they could not ignore the terrorism pervading their town. Everyday news of more arson and beatings flashed across the television screen. Their neighborhood was no longer safe because a handful of powerful, rash, prejudiced men wanted to axe unequal rights.
I sighed as my flashback ended. For me, humanity was depressing. I’m not really the one who sees the world in black and white, am I? I thought to myself as I rose to my paws and stretched. I wondered idly how long it would take for someone below to find a taller ladder or climb my tree. Maybe then they could finally view the world from an animal’s point of view.
