Welcome to Gaia! ::

Silver Moon Poetry

Back to Guilds

Poetry is what gets lost in translation ~Robert Frost~ 

Tags: poetry, writting, lyrics, haiku, poem 

Reply [[POETRY]] - {{Misc.}}
Cog- My Clockwork heart (Omfg Davis Posts A poem!!!)

Quick Reply

Enter both words below, separated by a space:

Can't read the text? Click here

Submit

Davis Shadenhand
Crew

PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 3:15 am


Cog- My Clockwork heart

Words escape This mechanical man
Like the hands on a clock
or hourglass sand
I tick without fail
I move without waste
I live without life
and tick with such grace

Like a metronome
Obscenely precise
This man made device
It doesn't pulse or beat
It doesn't feel or weep
It ticks
just ticks
Never losing a stroke
never skipping a beat
Always on time
always in sync

Clockwork Adam
stuck in Eden
Without a Gear-laden Eve
It's no wonder
I wonder
If I could ever leave
or even Grieve the need
To be freed
of this bronze Prison
in my breast.
I do my best to lay these thoughts to rest
but it still ticks in my chest..

A clock work marvel yes,
but a man I am not


End.


I figure it's been ages since I've contributed anything so, Here's something I just freestyled into a post.... Hope you like it.
PostPosted: Thu Nov 06, 2008 6:24 pm


I find this very interesting. It remind me of those day you don't feel alive or dead. Keep it up!

Requiem of the Exodus


Davis Shadenhand
Crew

PostPosted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 1:18 pm


thank you, I was feeling rather nonexistent when I wrote it...
PostPosted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 5:03 pm


It has a rhythm in some places, but not in others. I think if you were to edit it, you should try to maintain the rhythm, because it's describing mechanics, and ticking... just a thought.

Silver Wingling
Crew


Fluffy Pankakes

PostPosted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 10:43 am


I love it! lol that's all I can say about it. I can't think of any other words. This is a wonderful poem.
PostPosted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 3:59 pm


@Silver Wingling: It's also describing an imperfect being. So I don't want it to be too mechanical

@Fluffy Pankakes: Thanks? *blush*

Davis Shadenhand
Crew


LunarHybrid
Captain

PostPosted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 10:22 pm


I love it! (Sorry to sound redundant.) It made me sad cuz I've felt that way many times before, but the Adam/Eve roles were switched; yet it made me happy cuz I know I have someone special now. Good job on rhyming too, I could never do it as well as you.
Reply
[[POETRY]] - {{Misc.}}

 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum