These nights I lay awake unsure of how to think, feel, act or who to be, love, what should I desire? After five years of loving someone and then learning to love another seems all to alien yet all so easy.

Falling in love with the one who picked up the peices was easier than thinking of what it feels like to be free falling off a cliff or burning my hands over and over to feel the sensation of burning acid.

Who knew love would stop those thoughts? Flood the depression and resurect the innocence of my soul? Why is it easy to sleep these nights when I am missing the old love but worshiping the new? These nights have become my own nightmare yet my own fantasy, I'm unwilling to leave this place inside my head.