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 Posted: Wed Nov 05, 2008 3:22 am
I need a laugh - and I'm prepared to pay for it!
First prize is 1000 gold
Second prize is 500 gold
Third prize is 100 gold
Booby prize is a fish
I'm not sure how I'll pick a winner, it might be a dice roll. Anyway - jokes please!
heart
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Posted: Wed Nov 05, 2008 7:47 pm
Okay so there are two muffins in an oven.
And one muffin turns to the other muffin and says "It is me or is it hot in here?"
And the other muffins says {by shouting} "Aaaahh! A talking muffin!"
(sound effects not included) biggrin
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Posted: Wed Nov 05, 2008 7:57 pm
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. They roasted marshmallows, told stories around the campfire, and then decided to hit the sack. Watson wakes up in the middle of the night to a nudge from Holmes.
"Mm? What? Hm? Oh, Holmes. What do you want?"
"Watson. look up there, up above us, and tell me what you deduce from what you see."
"Well, let's see. There are millions, even billions of stars in the sky, and if only a tiny fraction of those stars have planets orbiting them, and only a tiny fraction of those planets are habitable by life as we know it, and only a tiny fraction of those planets actually contain some form of life, surely some of that life must be intelligent, and we cannot be alone in the universe."
"Watson, you idiot! Somebody's stolen our tent!"
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Posted: Wed Nov 05, 2008 9:21 pm
Why did the husband get swatted upside the head when his wife got a haircut?
He just couldn't keep to himself how hil-HAIR-ious she looked.
/fail
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Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 9:03 pm
Why did the girl fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms
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Posted: Fri Nov 07, 2008 9:09 pm
It's not really a joke but for some reason jokes always make think of a little song from the 1910's . . .
Mary had a birdie and her name was Enza
She opened up a window and in-flu-enza
The same grandam who used to tell the jokes always sang it biggrin
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Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 6:10 pm
Where do roofers go when they're looking for a date?
To a shingles bar.
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Posted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:41 am
chibihotachan It's not really a joke but for some reason jokes always make think of a little song from the 1910's . . . Mary had a birdie and her name was Enza She opened up a window and in-flu-enza The same grandam who used to tell the jokes always sang it biggrin hehehehehe ...you're in the running to win the fish. eek
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Posted: Wed Nov 12, 2008 12:42 am
Sheboygan Milad Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. They roasted marshmallows, told stories around the campfire, and then decided to hit the sack. Watson wakes up in the middle of the night to a nudge from Holmes. "Mm? What? Hm? Oh, Holmes. What do you want?" "Watson. look up there, up above us, and tell me what you deduce from what you see." "Well, let's see. There are millions, even billions of stars in the sky, and if only a tiny fraction of those stars have planets orbiting them, and only a tiny fraction of those planets are habitable by life as we know it, and only a tiny fraction of those planets actually contain some form of life, surely some of that life must be intelligent, and we cannot be alone in the universe." "Watson, you idiot! Somebody's stolen our tent!" This one really made me laugh rofl
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Posted: Sat Nov 22, 2008 1:26 am
I don't have jokes so much as I have phrases I come up with:
1. "Catholicism: come and get lost in the masses"
2. "The wonder bra: a better illusionist than Houdini"
3. "I like to think of strippers as previously viewed"
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Posted: Wed Nov 26, 2008 2:24 am
All I can think of at the moment is...
I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog.
eek
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Posted: Tue Dec 02, 2008 2:13 am
First Prize goes to : No one.
crying
I have decided to split the prize money up to all who participated. My thanks to you all!!
400 gold each to RisuNyfiken, Sheboygan Milad, kekadu, chibihotachan and the very punny AntoniaMerEnfant also wins the fish, a Brown Pebbo Feeder.
Thanks everyone!
Feel free to keep posting jokes, or links to funny things.
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Posted: Tue Dec 02, 2008 11:10 pm
Thank you, and I'll try to come with a better joke biggrin
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Posted: Wed Dec 03, 2008 10:51 am
From the Universe's greatest comic strip 
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