Welcome to Gaia! ::

Uhh.... OK.
Sometimes it feels like god has left me. So then I doubt my faith in Him. But then I always find something to comfort my faith, such as a miracle, or something in a song. Once, my brothers were giving me a hard time. So I did my usual: I ran into my room and cried. But then I did something UNusual. I asked God (if He was really there and if He really loved me) to make the rest of the day better. guess what. I had a great day after that. I also found a line in a Relient K song that I find totally true. "Sometimes the hardest thing to believe is the truth." I ALWAYS see something that comforts me. There was even really cool music I heard once that made me feel happy. I didn't know where it came from. (But I do now. God sent that music to comfort me. I know so.)

So basically, I just needed to tell someone that.

.....If I could get a few replies to this, that would be great. I need to know what people think of this.....

That song by Barlow Girl is amazing, the first time I heard it on the radio I wish they just played it over and over and over <3

but I dont think it's always a test of faith. I think it also has to do with our human nature - we push good things away from us and embrace the bad. Sometimes we completely unintentionally push God away; we don't even notice it. And then we feel like God hates us, when really he loves us to death (literally) and we just need to come back to him.
Which is what you did when you prayed. You came back to him.

The only thing is that whole attitude of "if you really love me, you'll help me stop feeling this way."

God DOES love you, like I said before - he loves you to death. He came down here, endured the pain we go through, and died for us on the cross, which is more pain than we will EVER know. The pain he went through leading up to the cross and on the cross is pain that we'll never know. So obviously, he loves you. Remember that God doesn't always do things our ways. in our weakness, he is strong. When we fall, he lifts us up.
so pray when you're having hard times or a bad day, because he WILL lift you up. But could you imagine having a child, and you loved them so much that you did anything and everything to keep them alive, and they said "but mom...if you love me you'll do this"...I don't think that would feel very good razz

I'm glad you shared this though, I think you'd really get a lot out of the sermons that my pastor (Dan) has been doing. when he posts them on our church website, I'll be sure to put the link in here.
The series is called Doubters Anonymous. I think _everyone_ has a lot to learn from them. I was mos def blessed :}

sorry for rambling lol

You suck so passionately