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 Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 5:09 am
(there may be spelling mistakes if u find any fell free to fix them also this is just a part of one of my storys i will write more l8er tell me what you think there is also a message in there so i want to see if anyone can find it good luck wink )
and as the man walked down the hall at
night it became clear that he was no longer
dreaming and he soon found him self struck by a
yo-yo. as he fell to the ground he saw a kid smileing
down at him. as the ground got closer he felt as if
over him was an evil presants. he asked who are
you.than he struck the ground. his eyes closeing slowly.
over hime still the kid began to laugh and it started to rain.
unabal to get up the man lied in the rain trying to call for help but
knowing that none will come finaly pasing out frome the blow to the head
not knowing for shere where he was whene he woke up he ask the
only othere person in the room it was dark and he could not see who it
was he was talking to but he asked "where am i" the figher in the dark
was serprised to here him ask " you dont know.why it was you who came to
hell in the first place" the man in the dark steped closer to revel that he was
only a shadow. the man looked around looking for the man who was just
in the room but he was nowhere to be found. "im not in hell am i." is
all he could say. as he sat there in the dark alone the voice came back
man is only as sane as he thinks he is.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:26 am
Spelling, grammar, and capitalization corrections are below in bold, whole word in bold for both reasons of correction. Story in red, my typing in black.
[?]And[?] as the man walked down the hall at night it became clear that he was no longer dreaming and he soon found himself struck by a
yo-yo. As he fell to the ground he saw a kid smiling down at him. The ground got closer he felt as if over him was an evil presents. He asked, "Who are you?" to the boy. Then he struck the ground, his eyes closing slowly. Over him the kid began to laugh and it started to rain. Unable to get up the man lie in the rain trying to call for help but knowing that no one would come, finaly passing out from the blow to the head. Not knowing for sure where he was, or when he woke up, he asked the only other person in the room. It was dark and he could not see who it was he was talking to but he asked "Where am I?" The figher in the dark was surprised to here him ask, "You dont know. Why, it was you who came to hell in the first place." The man in the dark stepped closer to revel that he was only a shadow. The man looked around looking for the man who was just in the room but he was nowhere to be found. "I'm not in hell, am I?" That was all he could say. as he sat there in the dark alone the voice came back man is only as sane as he thinks he is.
Message is that many are still confused on who they are or are not as good as they thought they were?
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:39 am
Talidestra Wolf Spelling, grammar, and capitalization corrections are below in bold, whole word in bold for both reasons of correction. Story in red, my typing in black. [?]And[?] as the man walked down the hall at night it became clear that he was no longer dreaming and he soon found himself struck by a
yo-yo. As he fell to the ground he saw a kid smiling down at him. The ground got closer he felt as if over him was an evil presents. He asked, "Who are you?" to the boy. Then he struck the ground, his eyes closing slowly. Over him the kid began to laugh and it started to rain. Unable to get up the man lie in the rain trying to call for help but knowing that no one would come, finaly passing out from the blow to the head. Not knowing for sure where he was, or when he woke up, he asked the only other person in the room. It was dark and he could not see who it was he was talking to but he asked "Where am I?" The figher in the dark was surprised to here him ask, "You dont know. Why, it was you who came to hell in the first place." The man in the dark stepped closer to revel that he was only a shadow. The man looked around looking for the man who was just in the room but he was nowhere to be found. "I'm not in hell, am I?" That was all he could say. as he sat there in the dark alone the voice came back man is only as sane as he thinks he is. Message is that many are still confused on who they are or are not as good as they thought they were? nope i but good gess i will give a hint l8er
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:46 am
Raymond101 Talidestra Wolf Spelling, grammar, and capitalization corrections are below in bold, whole word in bold for both reasons of correction. Story in red, my typing in black. [?]And[?] as the man walked down the hall at night it became clear that he was no longer dreaming and he soon found himself struck by a
yo-yo. As he fell to the ground he saw a kid smiling down at him. The ground got closer he felt as if over him was an evil presents. He asked, "Who are you?" to the boy. Then he struck the ground, his eyes closing slowly. Over him the kid began to laugh and it started to rain. Unable to get up the man lie in the rain trying to call for help but knowing that no one would come, finaly passing out from the blow to the head. Not knowing for sure where he was, or when he woke up, he asked the only other person in the room. It was dark and he could not see who it was he was talking to but he asked "Where am I?" The figher in the dark was surprised to here him ask, "You dont know. Why, it was you who came to hell in the first place." The man in the dark stepped closer to revel that he was only a shadow. The man looked around looking for the man who was just in the room but he was nowhere to be found. "I'm not in hell, am I?" That was all he could say. as he sat there in the dark alone the voice came back man is only as sane as he thinks he is. Message is that many are still confused on who they are or are not as good as they thought they were? nope i but good gess i will give a hint l8er Okay.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:37 am
I can guess the mesage but I think I want the hint first.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:43 am
Lord_Von_Revenants I can guess the mesage but I think I want the hint first. Me too.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:43 am
ok the hint is it is a question to my friend andy you dont have to know him just his name also if you want to put what you think is the moral of the story is you can
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 10:47 am
Raymond101 ok the hint is it is a question to my friend andy you dont have to know him just his name also if you want to put what you think is the moral of the story is you can Umm...
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