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 Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 9:56 am
Now this is not a post to find people. It's a post to ask advice and/or get opinions.
My girlfriend and I have been together for over 9 months and we haven't had true intimacy for at least 5 of those months. She's Satanist and believes in a term called Free Love. It means that you can do anything with anyone as long as you have your partner's consent.
It took me a long time to allow this to happen. I wanted my side, but she wanted to go and "make whoppie" with other girls although she hadn't touched me in months. I was offended for a little while.
I got over it because I want her happy and clearly there's something wrong with me when I'm doing it. She's gone to chicago for a couple of days to a LGBT conference. I'm still kind of not comfortable with it but I want her happy. So I said she could have fun...when deep down I didn't fully like it.
The thing is I want to be able to do that because my drive is a little higher than average and I'm kind of ready to explode. I'm attracted to a girl from school and she's attracted to me and we plan to have some fun, so I had to let my girlfriend do the same. It's an equality thing. Which was my original concern and why I wouldn't grant her wish.
Now...
What do you think about this free love thing?
Is there anything I should be worried about?
Is anyone else here in a similar situation?
Please be serious as I am actually having a hard time with this. Thank you.
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 7:15 pm
Sorry to say... but I'm possesive... >.<; So It's a no for me... But lately, all I've been getting is hurt... and Hurt really badly... so... I lost all interest in love because of it... so... the free love thing is something Im considering... but.. no one wants me.. crying -hits myself on the head- WAIT! >3> Forget what I wrote. It's your situation that's important here.
I think "free love" is just a way to use one another for sexual pleasure. Mind you it's not bad... But if you are in a relationship... Then it becomes a problem because one might fall inlove with the "free love" partner..
You should be worried about how much you love your gf and how much you are attracted to that girl. Also like wise with your gf.
I wish I was though....v.v; Yay for loneliness XD
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Posted: Thu Jul 31, 2008 11:16 pm
Yeah that what I'm worried about. I know I won't run off with anyone else. I'm worried that she will. But she told me to have trust. *takes deep breath*
Btw...ever need a friend, you got one here. Sometimes friendship is better than love.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2008 6:39 pm
Yeah... That would be the only thing.. I suggest prepare your heart for it...just in case it might happed... but... -pats your shoulder- lets just hope it doesn't.. and if it doesn't.. Well, be the happiest girl to ever live x3
I know... I'm ok now... But don't worry, I will take you up on that over! x3
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Posted: Sat Aug 02, 2008 12:00 am
I have a little difficulty understanding "free love" in a relationship. If you choose to be in a full relationship with a person it should be all you need, if you need to go out side of the relationship for "love" then something isn't right.
Now "free love" while single, that's a whole 'nother story. It's just when other people are involved someone is bound to get hurt. You should go with your gut and if you aren't comfortable with it then don't tell her you are, talk to her about it maybe she'll understand.
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Posted: Sun Aug 03, 2008 10:08 pm
i realize that no one likes a greedy person, but the whole point of a relationship is that you love that one person above anyone else, and wouldn't even WANT anyone in their place. if you have a problem with her doing it, you need to tell her. communication is a key factor to any relationship anyways. if she has a problem with it, then maybe you guys should break up. i mean, i hate to tell anyone to break up, but i kinda define this free love thing as cheating. it's also a way to hurt you and make you feel unworthy, which i think isn't right. so maybe you should just try your luck with the other girl and if it doesn't work out, just move on. i'm sorry if this wasn't helpful.
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the_forgotten_thought Captain
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2008 7:08 am
Thanks for your advice...but this topic now has no point to it. my gf dumped me last night
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2008 1:10 pm
oh. i'm sorry. she better have had a damn good reason though! that's a long time together and it sucks. but at least you don't have to worry about the free love thing anymore.
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the_forgotten_thought Captain
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Posted: Tue Aug 05, 2008 9:04 pm
scream NO WAY!!! gonk Im really sorry to hear that.... forgotten is right... she better have a good reason for it!
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 12:16 pm
She's lost her feelings for me. Apparently she still cares...but only as a friend sad
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 7:26 pm
My gf I once had had been like this mainly, though she was into sex a lot. She is in a sex group though too, like a club with their own beach house.
Though in my case, we had 2200 miles between us. I don't quite have experience up close for the right kind of answer I guess.
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Posted: Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:49 pm
Daemon of Skorm She's lost her feelings for me. Apparently she still cares...but only as a friend sad how dare she! dude, she's prolly not gf material in the first place, though. especially if she wanted to do that free love stuff WHILE in a relationship! no worries. there's lots of more faithful girls out there.
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the_forgotten_thought Captain
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