I have been into writing poetry for quite a few years, finally I believe that it is a good time to set up a thread to allow others to review my work and comment or give criticism to it (For you should always learn how to better yourself through every friend and every foe.)
And here is where we shall start- with a trip that had come to mind with inspiration from the great horror writer H.P. Lovecraft.
Jeremy- by Jack Skater (Also under the name of FrothyB)
'Jeremy is gone,' that's all I can say,
His disappearance happening that dreadful day;
The accomplice in my sinister work and plan,
That had now caused the bizarre departure of the man.
Our business began about a month or two ago,
In that cursed town to which I shall never again go.
I tremble to think 'it' is not accounted for,
Jeremy was one of the first, but there will be more!
We arrived August Twenty-ninth by the local train way,
To pay for the old, secluded house in which we would stay;
Where Jeremy and I would lock up tight,
Secretly preforming our studies by candle-light.
There had been strange disappearances of people in the night,
Their corpse being found the next day, deathly cold and white.
News was spread as many people fled,
Leaving the once prosperous town ghostly dead.
My associate and I knew we were close to what we wanted,
As the news spread about where the thing had haunted.
Reports of a shadow creeping 'long alley walls,
Of it breaking through windows in people's homes and halls.
We wanted to study it, how the 'it' came about,
To sample its blood or a tissue sample we hoped to cut out.
So we read articles, drew up maps and charts to find the thing,
Which moved stealthily and silent like a creature on wing'.
We set out on October Thirteenth, a Friday for our hunt,
Just taking a few supplies including a spade that was blunt.
We searched places of interest where the wicked beast could hide,
Which included several of the homes where the victims had died.
All the victims we saw had on their necks marks of strangulation,
Which only added more bewilderment to out current frustration.
The marks seemed to be made by fingers of a large man;
We left the bodies in peace, locking up the place as best as we can.
Jeremy and I then headed to the town's only cemetery,
Where according to the undertaker who had been there since February;
That we might find the fiend on that very lot,
For strange things were supposedly seen in that spot.
We looked about the premises as the man left quickly,
Saying that his job was done and that he felt quite sickly.
So we searched about with an electric torch from what we did bring,
Until Jeremy called to me- he had found something.
It was a strange stone like coffin, only half buried in the ground,
Our curiosity growing at the odd scene we had found.
We carefully dug it up, our hearts feeling like lead-
As we both cautiously pulled off the lid to reveal the dead.
I can not describe the scene that did quickly unfold;
When they found me, I was unconscious I was told.
But before the blackness surrounded me, I remember what the thing had said
'Jeremy is gone' it hissed, for now Jeremy is dead...
And here is where we shall start- with a trip that had come to mind with inspiration from the great horror writer H.P. Lovecraft.
Jeremy- by Jack Skater (Also under the name of FrothyB)
'Jeremy is gone,' that's all I can say,
His disappearance happening that dreadful day;
The accomplice in my sinister work and plan,
That had now caused the bizarre departure of the man.
Our business began about a month or two ago,
In that cursed town to which I shall never again go.
I tremble to think 'it' is not accounted for,
Jeremy was one of the first, but there will be more!
We arrived August Twenty-ninth by the local train way,
To pay for the old, secluded house in which we would stay;
Where Jeremy and I would lock up tight,
Secretly preforming our studies by candle-light.
There had been strange disappearances of people in the night,
Their corpse being found the next day, deathly cold and white.
News was spread as many people fled,
Leaving the once prosperous town ghostly dead.
My associate and I knew we were close to what we wanted,
As the news spread about where the thing had haunted.
Reports of a shadow creeping 'long alley walls,
Of it breaking through windows in people's homes and halls.
We wanted to study it, how the 'it' came about,
To sample its blood or a tissue sample we hoped to cut out.
So we read articles, drew up maps and charts to find the thing,
Which moved stealthily and silent like a creature on wing'.
We set out on October Thirteenth, a Friday for our hunt,
Just taking a few supplies including a spade that was blunt.
We searched places of interest where the wicked beast could hide,
Which included several of the homes where the victims had died.
All the victims we saw had on their necks marks of strangulation,
Which only added more bewilderment to out current frustration.
The marks seemed to be made by fingers of a large man;
We left the bodies in peace, locking up the place as best as we can.
Jeremy and I then headed to the town's only cemetery,
Where according to the undertaker who had been there since February;
That we might find the fiend on that very lot,
For strange things were supposedly seen in that spot.
We looked about the premises as the man left quickly,
Saying that his job was done and that he felt quite sickly.
So we searched about with an electric torch from what we did bring,
Until Jeremy called to me- he had found something.
It was a strange stone like coffin, only half buried in the ground,
Our curiosity growing at the odd scene we had found.
We carefully dug it up, our hearts feeling like lead-
As we both cautiously pulled off the lid to reveal the dead.
I can not describe the scene that did quickly unfold;
When they found me, I was unconscious I was told.
But before the blackness surrounded me, I remember what the thing had said
'Jeremy is gone' it hissed, for now Jeremy is dead...
