There was a little boy. He liked to use words his parents used.
Now one night he heard his parents fight and they used the words "You, b*****d" "You b***h"
and the little boy asked mommy daddy what's b*****d and b***h
and they told him they were just words that meant ladies and gentlemen
that night he heard them having sex saying "Show me them titties, gimme that d**k"
and the boy asked what titties and dicks were and his parents told him just words for hats and coats
the next day it was thanksgiving and his dad was shaving and he cut himself and yelled "s**t"
the boy asked what s**t mean and his dad told him it was another word for shaving cream
then he walked into the kitchen where his mom was stuffing the turkey and she cut herself and screamed "******** asked what ******** meant and she said its another word for stuffing
~~~
Later when the guests arrived he answered the door with the greeting...
"Welcome bastards and bitches, please hang your titties and dicks on the coathanger and wait in the living room until my dad is done wiping the s**t off his face and my mom is done ******** the turkey."

Lol this is probably gonna be deleted...