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 Posted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 5:25 am
i want coherent, capable love
i want to be known for who i am
i want to be seen.
not seen for who i am not
i want to be understood, kicking screaming and cursing
i want for it to be okay that i am me
i want to be loved by choice.
not by compulsion, list requirements or void filling
i do not want to be the solution to the sum total of your insecurities.
i do not want to be loved because you are hungry
i do not want to be loved because you are lonely
no, i don't want a LOVE defined, measured
and related to based on moments and first impressions
If i was a b*****d with you
i am still a b*****d
i was a b*****d before you
i am not your missing piece
i am not your compulsion
i am not your addiction
i am me without you
i am me with you
i am me
what i want is not complex
but we are
i want love based on who we are
i don't want fantasy
i can't live in dreams
all that i want is all i have to give
ironically enough, this was written just before a relationship that was everything contrary to this poem... XD Live and learn baby, live and learn.
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Posted: Fri Jun 13, 2008 7:08 pm
That's a good spouting of feelings.
It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted.
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:19 am
AntoniaMerEnfant That's a good spouting of feelings. It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted. i call that the trial and error of relationship, hopefully widdling down what you want and don't until you get a clearer picture of what you should have and should give.
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:41 am
spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant That's a good spouting of feelings. It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted. i call that the trial and error of relationship, hopefully widdling down what you want and don't until you get a clearer picture of what you should have and should give. When it comes to relationships I have a weird policy. Unlike a lot of girls I'm not terribly picky about who I date- I give most everyone a shot (With a few notable exceptions), but I have a lot of "turn-over". I'm really stoked, Yonsan and I have been together almost a year. He still tolerates me, much to my amazement.
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 5:56 am
AntoniaMerEnfant spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant That's a good spouting of feelings. It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted. i call that the trial and error of relationship, hopefully widdling down what you want and don't until you get a clearer picture of what you should have and should give. When it comes to relationships I have a weird policy. Unlike a lot of girls I'm not terribly picky about who I date- I give most everyone a shot (With a few notable exceptions), but I have a lot of "turn-over". I'm really stoked, Yonsan and I have been together almost a year. He still tolerates me, much to my amazement. i definitely would not knock tolerance. i happen to think some of the most romantic things are things like getting an "i love you" thru gritting pissed off teeth. Hey anyone can say it when they're all hopped up on lovey dovey emotions. also i'm incredibly attracted to a girl who is still there in spite of me sometimes. i love THE LOOK. and i know you know the look. its that look women use where they have an odd moment wherein he has done something questionable, not bad, just questionable and you stare at him with almost no expression. and i've found, what you lovely ladies are doing is mentally tallying up all our good and bad attributes to see if we're still worth it... xd xd i luff just barely coming out ahead. I think love's a decision you unconsciously and consciously make every day.
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 6:08 am
spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant That's a good spouting of feelings. It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted. i call that the trial and error of relationship, hopefully widdling down what you want and don't until you get a clearer picture of what you should have and should give. When it comes to relationships I have a weird policy. Unlike a lot of girls I'm not terribly picky about who I date- I give most everyone a shot (With a few notable exceptions), but I have a lot of "turn-over". I'm really stoked, Yonsan and I have been together almost a year. He still tolerates me, much to my amazement. i definitely would not knock tolerance. i happen to think some of the most romantic things are things like getting an "i love you" thru gritting pissed off teeth. Hey anyone can say it when they're all hopped up on lovey dovey emotions. also i'm incredibly attracted to a girl who is still there in spite of me sometimes. i love THE LOOK. and i know you know the look. its that look women use where they have an odd moment wherein he has done something questionable, not bad, just questionable and you stare at him with almost no expression. and i've found, what you lovely ladies are doing is mentally tallying up all our good and bad attributes to see if we're still worth it... xd xd i luff just barely coming out ahead. I think love's a decision you unconsciously and consciously make every day. I don't know if it's even conscious. It's more like breathing. For me I know I love a person when everything is irking me, disappointing me, and even hurting me and still-- still I cannot even force myself to stop caring for someone. We all judge how we love a little differently I think. For me I am not one to forgive easily. I know I love someone when I always find myself forgiving even the worst of transgressions. When you love people for who they are you continue to love them even when they hurt you. They don't stop being themselves- so what you love is still there, even if it's a painful thing.
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Posted: Sat Jun 14, 2008 6:40 am
AntoniaMerEnfant spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant spectremis AntoniaMerEnfant That's a good spouting of feelings. It makes me feel a little guilty for some past relationships- what it came down to was simply I wasn't what they wanted and they weren't what I wanted. i call that the trial and error of relationship, hopefully widdling down what you want and don't until you get a clearer picture of what you should have and should give. When it comes to relationships I have a weird policy. Unlike a lot of girls I'm not terribly picky about who I date- I give most everyone a shot (With a few notable exceptions), but I have a lot of "turn-over". I'm really stoked, Yonsan and I have been together almost a year. He still tolerates me, much to my amazement. i definitely would not knock tolerance. i happen to think some of the most romantic things are things like getting an "i love you" thru gritting pissed off teeth. Hey anyone can say it when they're all hopped up on lovey dovey emotions. also i'm incredibly attracted to a girl who is still there in spite of me sometimes. i love THE LOOK. and i know you know the look. its that look women use where they have an odd moment wherein he has done something questionable, not bad, just questionable and you stare at him with almost no expression. and i've found, what you lovely ladies are doing is mentally tallying up all our good and bad attributes to see if we're still worth it... xd xd i luff just barely coming out ahead. I think love's a decision you unconsciously and consciously make every day. I don't know if it's even conscious. It's more like breathing. For me I know I love a person when everything is irking me, disappointing me, and even hurting me and still-- still I cannot even force myself to stop caring for someone. We all judge how we love a little differently I think. For me I am not one to forgive easily. I know I love someone when I always find myself forgiving even the worst of transgressions. When you love people for who they are you continue to love them even when they hurt you. They don't stop being themselves- so what you love is still there, even if it's a painful thing. love is like breathing.. exactly my point. when you don't pay attention and life's fairly easy, you don't even noticing your breathing. sometimes you can hold your breath, but that air is going to come out and more in. sometimes the air around you is thick, or you're simply tired and you actually have to work to breath. love is like breathing..both conscious and unconscious and yet still necessary.
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