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 Posted: Wed Apr 30, 2008 5:24 pm
Okay, many of you love your mothers. And that's great! It's nice to get along with the woman (or man? x.x) who gave you life. It's a good thing.
But it's not everyone.
I, for one, absolutely ABHOR my mother. I feel choked whenever I'm in her presence. She buys me bikinis, makes me go to Aeropostale (I'm a Hot Topic girl) and many other things which I do not agree with or do not enjoy. Once, when I wanted to get my hair cut, she would not let me. She said it was pretty long, but that's debatable. I prefer my hair being short for many reasons, including it looks better on me. So, when she finally caves and lets me get my hair cut, she doesn't even let me get it cut the way I want it to be cut. I love layers, and have had them before. My mother said that I wouldn't be able to keep my hair out of my face for soccer, which is an outright lie, because I know for a fact that at the length that I wanted, I would be able to keep it out of my face.
But I still wanted it cut, and agreed on a straight cut. She then gets her hair cut at the same length, and it looks so like mine. The hairdresser said we looked like twins. My mother smiled, but I groaned. I hate being like another person; it makes me feel as if I'm being compared. This makes me angry, because I'm ME, and no one else.
Then she picks my friends. I have not yet had my birthday "get-together," because of disagreements on who I would invite. I wanted to invite four of my friends from school and two others, who I love with my whole self. One of the two friends I wanted to invite who did not go to my school had not yet been to my house. But I'd been to hers. My mother said she was not a friend. "She is just an aqquaintence," were her words. My anger exploded within me, and I told her right then how I felt about her. It was not pleasent, her that I hated her. But I felt that I had to do it.
I'm not sure if you'd understand. But I wanted to tell her, (I did not, though), that I would rather save an aqquaintence than my own mother.
[I have not had my birthday yet. It was on Apr. 20, which seems like ages ago. But I'm planning it this weekend, with my "aqquaintence friend!"]
I know I seem bitchy, but I'm not trying to come across as such. It's just that I can't stand her. It seems like she's trying to make me into a mini-her. Constantly, people are trying to compliment me by saying how much I look like my mother, or act like her, or speak like her. I can't stand it! I try to get along with her, but it seems so hard! It seems like everyone loves their mothers. It's just so annoying that the only woman I've hated as much as I do is mine.
So, here I am, looking for similar people and pointers.
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Posted: Thu May 01, 2008 2:43 pm
You're not being bitchy, you're being yourself...okay, that came out wrong.
What I mean to say is that you're perfectly justified in being mad, and it's better you let it out ranting on the internet then by punching a wall or something. I know how it feels to be constantly compared to someone, and I know it sucks, it's like they expect to see the other person in you, and not yourself, which is infuriating.
You're also perfectly right on the friend issue. YOU, get to pick your friends, not your mother. If you were hanging out with bad people, I might be able to understand her trying to do this. As it is, however, she had no right to say who and who you couldn't invite to your birthday...get-together.
From what you've said, your mother is trying to be involved in your life, which is usually nice, but she's becoming far, FAR too involved in yours. I'm not sure it was the best idea to tell her how you felt, but what's done is done, I'm afraid.
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Posted: Fri May 02, 2008 2:45 pm
I feel your pain. My mum does that... sweatdrop
Maybe because they want us to be perfect little girly-girls, and we just don't end up that way... I know that's how my mum said it anyways when she tried to make me where a skirt to my friends birthday party. (I haaaaate skirts, btw) she yelled at me for that... sweatdrop
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Posted: Wed May 07, 2008 4:24 am
pinkie13ducky I feel your pain. My mum does that... sweatdrop Maybe because they want us to be perfect little girly-girls, and we just don't end up that way... I know that's how my mum said it anyways when she tried to make me where a skirt to my friends birthday party. (I haaaaate skirts, btw) she yelled at me for that... sweatdrop
She used to yell at my sister because she always wore slacks and jeans everywhere. I thought she looked nice though. o.o
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Posted: Wed May 07, 2008 4:26 am
Jack2634 You're not being bitchy, you're being yourself...okay, that came out wrong.
What I mean to say is that you're perfectly justified in being mad, and it's better you let it out ranting on the internet then by punching a wall or something. I know how it feels to be constantly compared to someone, and I know it sucks, it's like they expect to see the other person in you, and not yourself, which is infuriating.
You're also perfectly right on the friend issue. YOU, get to pick your friends, not your mother. If you were hanging out with bad people, I might be able to understand her trying to do this. As it is, however, she had no right to say who and who you couldn't invite to your birthday...get-together.
From what you've said, your mother is trying to be involved in your life, which is usually nice, but she's becoming far, FAR too involved in yours. I'm not sure it was the best idea to tell her how you felt, but what's done is done, I'm afraid.
The thing that angers me the most after telling her how I felt was she treated me no different, and has not tried to understand how I feel.
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