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 Posted: Fri Apr 25, 2008 11:03 am
My boyfriend slipped into a depression about a month into our relationship.
I have supported him and tried to make him happy because I do love him. Its been three months now. He argues with me alot, he's mean, and he just doesent seem to care about anyone but himself.
He wants me to be happy and I think he's been trying to make me break up with him.
I don't wanna be happy with someone else, I wanna be happy with him.
I don't know what do do or say anymore and have seriously started thinking about moving on. I really dont want to but mostly it has been me holing up the both of us. I just talked to him about it and he said he would try to hold me up like I have been doing this whole time.
When he's in a good mood we have such a great time together. I know he's not like this on purpose.
Please give me tips/help!
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Posted: Mon Apr 28, 2008 5:15 pm
I think that the most you can really do right now is be pacient with him. I mean if you really like him and dont want to move on you need to be pacient with him and show him that you want to help & be there for him. Also, if you think he was trying to make you break up with him you should try talking somethings out with him, and see what he wants to do.
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Posted: Sun May 11, 2008 9:23 pm
i agree with emo pankakes just hang in there and show him that he means something itll help him out a lot trust me good luck to you howtheundeadweep My boyfriend slipped into a depression about a month into our relationship. I have supported him and tried to make him happy because I do love him. Its been three months now. He argues with me alot, he's mean, and he just doesent seem to care about anyone but himself. He wants me to be happy and I think he's been trying to make me break up with him. I don't wanna be happy with someone else, I wanna be happy with him. I don't know what do do or say anymore and have seriously started thinking about moving on. I really dont want to but mostly it has been me holing up the both of us. I just talked to him about it and he said he would try to hold me up like I have been doing this whole time. When he's in a good mood we have such a great time together. I know he's not like this on purpose. Please give me tips/help!
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Posted: Thu Jun 05, 2008 1:35 am
its unfortunate when things like this happen, but if u really feel like u love him then u not only need to stick around but also try to get to the root of this problem, and if u cant solve it, encourage him to seek help. I know how u feel or better yet my partner knows how u feel. Alot of times depression doesnt come from recent events, it can arise from being supressed in the past. Alot of things that crushed me in my past bottled up and started to wear on me when i got together with my partner. it always seems that when ur finally happy that the fears and terror from past events come back to haunt us, its just how it works. Its a waiting game, hes not going to tell u right away, but u also need to make as much of an effort to make him comfortable opening up, share things with him, they dont have to be big, just small things and eventually when he feels comfortable that ur open, he should open up too.
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Chippy the Vampire Slayer
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Posted: Mon Jun 16, 2008 7:03 am
Yeah I agree, wait it out... depression can be caused from a variety of reasons and yep not necessarily due to what's happening currently.
Is he on any anti-depressants?
Depression itself does make the person very inward and self-centered as they do tend to constantly dwell on themselves and how awful they're feeling which is all part and parcel of it. If he's on meds then yeah try as best as possible to wait it out , it could some some months before he starts feeling better but try not to end it even if you think he's pushing you away.
Ultimately it's up to you, how much you can tolerate and how far your love can stretch for him. smile
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Posted: Sun Jun 22, 2008 9:20 pm
Seriously as hard as it is, he has so much crap to sort through and he is not willing enough to do so that it is just going to collapse onto you. It is hard, but the best option is just be open and honest with him. Set a goal for him to start working on and if he is willing to allow him to start working on him. If he does not progress further then see ya! Not your problem anymore. But you need to ask yourself... is he worth it? Is he worth the investment or is there someone better for you out there? Need more info just PM me!
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Posted: Mon Jun 23, 2008 3:07 pm
I started getting this way about 2 years ago, and I've been with my wife for 12 years!!! What I know is that there are a lot of things about myself that I dont understand: Why I feel the way I do about things, why I can't tune in with how others feel, why I feel so disconnected from life sometimes. It is not an easy thing to overcome. Some people are equipped to deal with life's beatings better than others, maybe like you do, and that's why you can manage to lift the both of you up and he can't. But, when I'm feeling good, things in the relationship are hella good. We're still in a tough place right now and I am seeking help to better understand myself. But, I'll say that it definetly takes TONS of patience and understanding and love to stay with someone who deals with their anger, sadness, and emotions the way he does.
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Posted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 5:48 pm
I feel that you should just be pacient with him. also, it might help if you find out what is wrong and help him sort it out. if it is something that you cant fix, help him by doing things to keep his mind off of it. other than that you should be pacient and wait it out.
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Posted: Thu Nov 27, 2008 7:52 am
I agree with Vampire Preincess Slam. If you know that he's not being this way on purpose then you should just be pacient. Try to understand him a lil bit more.
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