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Posted: Thu Apr 17, 2008 9:44 pm
No idea where to put this just something my friends and I made up. I may make a pic of it later on not sure. xp
Goblinization for dummies
The following are instructions on how to turn a child into a goblin.
How to turn a wished away child into a goblin in thirteen easy steps.
Step 1. Take a child who was wished away. Note this is not always easy.
Step 2. Restrain the child or make sure the child cannot leave the castle throne room. Ignore the screaming and crying as that will subside shortly.
Step 3. Prepare yourself a nice snack of honey on toast with a tall glass of milk. This could take a while.
Step 4. Continue to ignore the crying. If it hasn't stopped already, it will eventually.
Step 5. If there is someone attempting to solve the Labyrinth be sure not to let them get very far. If they end up in an oubliette LEAVE THEM THERE!
Step 6. At this point an idiotic goblin will come to the throne room to state something very obvious. It's wise to trust your instincts when they tell you to drop kick the goblin across the room.
Step 7. Wait patiently for the thirteen hours to pass.
Step 8. Change your clothes. If you haven't done so already note that it's best to change your outfit every hour or so. Why? I don't know. This is one of the bigger mysteries of The Labyrinth.
Step 9. Be sure to break out in eighties rock songs at random.
Step 10. By now you have noticed that thirteen hours have passed. Be sure to laugh maniacally.
Step 11. Now that you are done laughing like a cheap cartoon villain remember to breathe.
Step 12. After the spell is completed you will notice that the desperate cries and screams will have dulled to a pleasant grunting, squealing and or growling.
Step 13. Enjoy new goblin.
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Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 3:08 am
ah see I thought I had it all but I forgot to change my cloths every hour... damn I guess I will have to try again..
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Posted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 12:57 pm
i absolutely love step 6. drop kicking goblins must be fun, Jareth must get a rise out of it because the goblins are too stupid to say anything against it. though one would think he'd dirty his boots...
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Posted: Sun May 04, 2008 4:17 pm
I couldn't stop laughing while reading this! And one question, what is the significance of honey on bread?
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Posted: Mon May 05, 2008 1:15 pm
I'm out of honey! I can't complete these easy steps!!
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Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 11:24 pm
Javinus I'm out of honey! I can't complete these easy steps!! I'll go out and buy you some, then you can change the spoiled brats.
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Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 5:41 am
Joy the Goblin Queen Javinus I'm out of honey! I can't complete these easy steps!! I'll go out and buy you some, then you can change the spoiled brats. Just make sure it isn't Chinese honey made with corn syrup! (I am rather particular about honey, if you can't tell).
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Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 2:44 pm
Javinus Joy the Goblin Queen Javinus I'm out of honey! I can't complete these easy steps!! I'll go out and buy you some, then you can change the spoiled brats. Just make sure it isn't Chinese honey made with corn syrup! (I am rather particular about honey, if you can't tell). OK, can do. xd
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Posted: Tue May 20, 2008 2:50 pm
Joy the Goblin Queen Javinus Joy the Goblin Queen Javinus I'm out of honey! I can't complete these easy steps!! I'll go out and buy you some, then you can change the spoiled brats. Just make sure it isn't Chinese honey made with corn syrup! (I am rather particular about honey, if you can't tell). OK, can do. xd I don't particularly care all that much for honey.
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