Lost In Memories The Adventure Continues

[Danse-de-Macabre]

This is, One of ANgel's readings in her book, That Im thinking of putting in the story soon. Well My story. Were Bijou finds Angel's book and reads it. Will these secrets be exposed!!!???.

Dear Die-ary~Why so cold..~:
Date: 50,004

It has been days since I last saw the dead corpse of my mother. My heart seems to ache these days for survivol. and My mind empty with thoughts on how all this could have happend to me.
There are so many things that I want to get rid of..My emotions for starters. They seem to control me, Infuriate me with images and emotions that take control over my mind. At these times I wish i had not killed those hunters that had killed my mother..But what was i to do. Something took control over me and like all the cold and damp hatred in the world. What was I to do...I seem so cold now..So distant from everything and everyone..and yet i feel so at home..At home to the emptyness..at home to my damp feelings..At home..To the coldness.  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

Ty  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

Another Journal entry I thought of lately lol.

DearDie-Ary:~A Lonely World~
Date: 1970

It's a frieghtening world to be alone in. I realize that now, Ever since my mother and father were slaughterd before me. Sometimes i wonder now, If i ever should have ran away from that at all.
But then..I whould never have saved there corpses from being further choped up. and i whould never allow that. My mind has been traumitized from all those images in my head, Those hunters laughs haunt me, Infuriat me, and make me feel..So alone. I am alone in this wolrd now. Runing away was a good thing to do though. My subconcious tells me so..Though I somtimes wonder, Should i be alive at all, Should i continue to live after what i did to those...Humans.
Humans..What kind of a name for a..Supposibly intelligent species is that. There nothing..Nothing precious waste of breath and air that comes through the trees and leaves on them. Nothing but wastful idiocy. But perhaps, This is the end of my malice..Malice..Something i should'nt know of at all at this age, But i had no choice..I have been killing since 3.
There is a house at the far end were I am walking..As i read the words "Foster Home" I wonder..Is this the place to start out?.  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

I know. I made her have a crappy life! I feel so bad.  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

lol yes..Yes I am. Lmao  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

Hehehe lol  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

DearDie-Ary:~A loving..Family?~
Date: 1944

After spending time in that hell on earth. I have realized That I hate mankind even more so then before. There ignorant and small minded ways infuriate and make me sick to my stomach.
But my heart soar high as I found myself with another family, Perhaps this was the humans way of making me feel at home. I even smiled once, But my smile soon turned cold as I have found out within the third day of the year, My so called parents..Were vile creatures. I was beaten by my mother, Who every time I even spoke a word to her in vile attributes or even tried To help her, she whould yell and beat me, Mentaly and physicaly, I felt my body cringe at touch and my mind sick with abuse.
My father...Was no better. At night, I'd cringe and hold my blankets tight, Or as they called blankets for me, Was nothing but left thin sheets from the outside cold that shrouded my body with damp and coldness from the outside world. He whould come in...and do things to me that I am not proud of speaking of at these words.  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

DearDie-Ary:~Murderous thoughts~
Date: 1946

As I come to realize my life and who I am, I begin to wonder and ponder on my existance of this world and of myself. This world seems to hate me, It seems to spit me out and engulf me again, Only to throw me back into the hell I once knew as "Home".
Home..A word that has no meaning to me now, Only hate and anger. I could never have a home at all. While walking the streets of the town, looking through I come to realize that my new.."Parents" Were of no use to me, They only wanted me dead and hurt by them. I look at them now, as mere little species, Deserving to be dead, Deserving to be slaugterd, Maybe even burn in hell.
My mind raged with muerderous thoughts and deeds i should do to them, Torture them, Kill them, Play with there minds. Maybe even burn them.  

[Danse-de-Macabre]

DearDie-Ary:~Burn It Down~
Date: 1948

I have had enough...Last night I layed in bed, The cold sheets around my entire body, But still the coldness seeped through like water. I shiverd in agony, My feet and hands numb with coldness and my mind inraged with hatred and murder.
I needed there blood on my hands..There screams of terror to enter my mind, For to hear for all eternity. I wanted blood, The gore of there organs fumming down on my fingers, Seeping through the gap between my fingers. At these moments..I wonder what is wrong with me, These thoughts that control me. They seem to go through my mind, Engulfing everything I once knew to be right, and replacing it with mere murder and treaturious thoughts most foul to me.
I slowly got up from my bed, My hair was dangling by my sholders, I had not cleaned up in days, My foster mother usualy came in about this time, To yell and throw her danm vodka bottles at me, telling me die already and get out of there house. My foster dad..Well..Lets not get into that. I slowly got out of my bed, My feet and legs were wobbly, Due to the lack of fresh air in the house, The fumes of smoke and alchol rushed into my mouth and down through my veins, Infecting me with vicious coughs.
As I got up and I ran to the kitchen seeing noone there, what luck was I in to find myself not thrown or beaten after not being called apon. I flung open the drewer and reached in for the matches and a lighter. I had learned to use one of these when I roamed by myself. I Grabbed them quickly and a took a step back, As I did a felt a sense of conciousness. Something inside of me telling myself to stop, I shook the feeling merely away and ran out of the kitchen, My feet pounding against the floor, As I wooshed out from the door and out to the cold windy outside, I watched the sun come up.
It was beautiful and glorious, the way the orange and red mixed so elegantly with the clouds as they roamed together through the sky, I took my eyes off it and lite the match on fire. As I grabbed the gasoline my foster dad always left at the side of the house, and as I took off the cap that sealed there fate I began to pour it around the house, My feet were now coverd by the grass that seemed to tangle between my feet as I went all the way around the house slowly and skilfuly I did this, Without a thought in my mind to what I was about to do.
I made my way awat from the house as I threw the lite match down to the grass. and as I stood there watching the house burn, I closed my eyes and for that last moment two horrible screams and yells, flowed through my ears, and at that moment, a never ending calmness struck me.