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 Posted: Sun Mar 30, 2008 11:31 pm
Ever since i was little i never wanted to be anything. Most kids say, i want to be a scientist or a teacher etc. But i never knew what i wanted to be. I still don't know what i want to be. It's really frustrating now though... i'm in my last year of high school and i'm still unsure. What am i gonna do in college.
I feel that everything i do no matter if i like to do it or not, it doesn't really matter cause in the end we all die and it will all have been in vain. But then again... i feel empty... and i long to find that passion for the thing i like to do most. Though i don't know what it is i want to do at all.
My only talents are singing (but i'm too much of a nervous reck on stage to do it professionally). and helping others with their problems, by giving advice and being there for them. but the only way i can do that is by becoming a psychologist and i would hate to do that because that's a forced way of giving advice cause it's your job and you have to do it. It doesn't flow out of you naturally. Also at times a person might have a problem that you do not relate to or understand and there for cannot help them...
I don't know what i'm supposed to do with my life at all...
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Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 9:26 am
You are completely normal. It's said that most people will change professions (not just jobs, entire professions) six times in their life on average. In other words, it's okay not to know what you really want to do, because chances are you will try a variety of different things before you settle on that decision.
As for college, I was forced to declare a major before entering, and I completely disagree with that. I ended up changing my major after my first year, even though I could have sworn that I was going to love my first major, I ended up hating it. College is all about trying new things and finding the things that make you happy. Try a few new classes and see what you think. That's what got me started in education, and I couldn't be happier with my job.
I think one thing our society is really doing now is forcing people into the mindset that our lives are prescripted and we need to be meeting quotas and whatnot to stay on track. That's just pure bullshit. You live your life the way you best see fit, and if you don't know what you want to be yet, that's completely fine (and normal). Go to college, take your general ed. courses for a couple years, and see what you like best.
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Posted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 5:00 pm
Thank you, you've somewhat eased my frustration.
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Posted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 11:51 am
Hello Floral,
You metaphorically remind me of a monochrom flower. but don't worry, your true colors will show soon enough. This is not strange at all, some people just go through things like this.
Your perspective is nothing to be afraid of, as long as you can keep in mind that you always have growing to do, even as a full-grown adult. So no worries about what it seems right now.
And no worries if it feels meaningless. Why not focus on what good your skills can do for others that lack what you have? And what good it can bring them?
It sounds like you already know a little bit about yourself to have an idea of what you can do. Psychology is not just about forcing advise on someone. It's having a door open to people that need that advice in ways that they can understand. And it's a lot more than advice, but a way to pull people to the side and away from the murmers and rushes of society to take the time to learn about what it is they need to learn about themselves to become a better person. In which case, the psychologist would be more like the door-opener to the mind, not just a person saying ''you need to do this-- blah-blah-blah''.
In this case, take your core-classes with basic Psychology among them. See if it's what catches your fancy, if so, pursue it. If not, something else. Who knows, you may be able to learn about something in that class you never knew you were able to do.
If it's of any help, I had the problem when I got out of high school. I figured the only next thing I could do was get out into the real world and take my core classes. Along the way, I took time to spiritually reflect, and see the world through my own eyes. And found I enjoyed watching children learn about things.
Now, i'm on my way to becoming a pre-k teacher.
The point is, if you relax, just do what you can and take your time -- not everyone elses-- and learn about who you are and what the world sees you as, you'll find out your passion. It comes to you, in time.
Don't worry, you'll be just fine.
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Beloved Conversationalist
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Posted: Sun Apr 06, 2008 8:37 pm
This reply won't nearly be as good as the ones before me but I'll give it a go anyway with my response...
I understand your frustration. Ever since about 6th grade I've had it hammered into my head that you HAVE to have good grades to graduate and HAVE to have good scores to get into college, and anyone who decides not to go to college or uni is a deadbeat and won't make much money. It pisses me off that people are setting these huge standards for us. Instead of inspiring us to be all we can be, all we can think about is "my life is over if I fail this class," or "my life will be nothing if I don't have something to major in." It's insane and totally unfair. It's good to have a focus in life, something that drives you, but you also need to LIVE. What helped me was going to England for four months. I lived with my bf and his family and got to look at life from a different perspective. It was amazing and I feel so much more whole. When you step away from the chaos that's telling you what to do and how to live your life if you want to be successful, then hopefully it will get much easier for you. I knew that if I went straight into college after graduating highschool I would be a mess, and I'm so glad I decided to take that break.
Don't rush into anything. Take your time in figuring out what suits you. Pick a whole bunch of random classes to take and see if any of them attracts you.
As for being a psychologist/therapist, it's nothing like you say it is. I've had therapy for years with a few therapists and it's always been pleasant. I don't always get advice but it helps to talk to someone who isn't biased and can give perspective in a way I never thought about. Being in therapy has made me realise that's what I want to do. I've never had the boring therapist who sits in a chair with the clipboard and replies with, "and how does that make you feel." I've never had a bad experience and I hope to make someone feel like my therapists have made me feel.
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Posted: Tue Jul 29, 2008 10:03 am
Floral Pink Ever since i was little i never wanted to be anything. Most kids say, i want to be a scientist or a teacher etc. But i never knew what i wanted to be. I still don't know what i want to be. It's really frustrating now though... i'm in my last year of high school and i'm still unsure. What am i gonna do in college. I feel that everything i do no matter if i like to do it or not, it doesn't really matter cause in the end we all die and it will all have been in vain. But then again... i feel empty... and i long to find that passion for the thing i like to do most. Though i don't know what it is i want to do at all. My only talents are singing (but i'm too much of a nervous reck on stage to do it professionally). and helping others with their problems, by giving advice and being there for them. but the only way i can do that is by becoming a psychologist and i would hate to do that because that's a forced way of giving advice cause it's your job and you have to do it. It doesn't flow out of you naturally. Also at times a person might have a problem that you do not relate to or understand and there for cannot help them... I don't know what i'm supposed to do with my life at all... well u dont conform to the norm and i think that that's a good thing but i think ur problem is becuz u havent found ur niche yet - cuz when u do ur gonna just wanna pour ur soul into it no matter how litttle u think its gonna mean in the grand scope of things ur an interesting person tho and i think u shud go in search of that one thing that makes u feel complete in this world, cuz ur gonna feel empty until u do oh and a bit of advice dont make the mistake of some other girls thinking that this thing is a man or a relationship or some bulshit like that cuz it isnt anyways good luck on ur quest and feel free to add me asd a frend as i said ur interesting and i like u
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