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I don't know what your face looks like so to avoid the risk of insulting you by pointing out anything anatomical, you should probably give a picture
Otherwise I think it is extremely rough lacks contrast; I can barely tell where you did some shading and I think you need to make it more noticeable since values on your face aren't going to just be that subtle

Alright,...You're running into a common problem of drawing what you think you see, not what you're actually seeing; since you're working from a photo it should be easier to spot differences between your drawing and your source material. What's happening is your left brain is using symbols it can quantify in place of accurate representations.
You're going to want to focus on rendering shapes and the shapes or spaces between them. Since you're working from a photo, it should be much easier to mentally break up the image and duplicate it. So instead of drawing what you know to be an eye, you're going to be drawing a collection of shapes as described by your source photo to build a representation of your source photo...that just happens to look like an eye.
(Am I making any sense there?)

Right now, you have a problem with shrinking the facial features to fit in a much smaller space than where they would normally lie. The second drawing you posted shows that it may not be your shrinking the features, so much as overestimating the space of the jaw and cranium around them. With the side-by-side comparison in the second, you can see that the space between the eye and the side of the cranium is vastly larger than on your source photo.
You might be starting to focus on details to quickly, as well. Your goal right now should be layout/structure; once you get the proportioning right, you can start adding in subtle values, anatomical details, etc. Start with blocking in sections with shapes. Try viewing planes and shadows as flat shapes to be rendered later, it'll help you place things more accurately.
Start simple and progress only when the simple blocking is looking accurate.

If your art teacher doesn't take offense, I'd also recommend working in black and white. Removing color from the drawing will help you learn and focus on the representation and help you pin down value changes. And since you're drawing digitally, you can come back at a later stage and paint over it in color on a separate layer.

But I'm not a guild member either, so I take what I say with a grain of salt whee