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devilisnotagoodlookingman
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 Posted: Sun Mar 02, 2008 11:52 pm
this a rough draft a song I resently wrote and am now putting here for some critisms
Verse 1
My life is a wreck, my body rotting away
I just want to be alone, but I just want to live on my own
This life is a bore this home I have is losing its gory
Chorus
I just think of you and because I know it never will be true
My mind is just being fooled I know not what to do
This is the time, I live here alone but I just think you
To hope something will be true
Verse 2
I know it might be wrong, for me to keep wishing
I know I may lose, but I will keep trying
This glow might end, but its life will keep going
I know this, the end for me
Chorus
I just think of you and because I know it never will be true
My mind is just being fooled I know not what to do
This is the time, I live here alone but I just think you
To hope something will be true
Verse 3
This is my last try, my stride of life
I may die, but knowing you kept well
I see far into the distance, and know
That this is my chance, to be not alone
I will try one more time, and hope it will let me go
On with my life so alone, but changes might be
The alone be not so alone
Chorus
I just think of you and because I know it never will be true
My mind is just being fooled I know not what to do
This is the time, I live here alone but I just think you
To hope something will be true
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Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 2:30 pm
Zein, your song goes under the 'poetry' forum. The Writer's Hall is for like chapter stories or short stories.
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devilisnotagoodlookingman
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Posted: Wed Mar 05, 2008 9:33 pm
Ahhh, well I can put chapter stories too
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