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An E-Mail My Daddeh Sent Me.. [[LOTS OF PROFANITY]] Goto Page: [] [<] 1 2

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We just needed to remind you...
  That you will be baked, and then there will be cake.
  THE CAKE IS A LIE! THE CAKE IS A LIE!!!!
  Estuans interius ira vehementi o_O
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Grin Evilly

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 2:19 pm


Ha ha. <3
I feel like s**t today and that makes me feel betterrr.
PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 3:01 pm


XDD
I love it.

Here's an e-mail I got today:


Recently the Department of Women did a research project about what women though of their asses.

5% of women found their asses to small
15% of women thought that their asses were to big

While the remaining 80% thought their asses were fine and they would have married him anyways.


WinterBean


Seranin

PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 7:52 pm


WinterBean
XDD
I love it.

Here's an e-mail I got today:


Recently the Department of Women did a research project about what women though of their asses.

5% of women found their asses to small
15% of women thought that their asses were to big

While the remaining 80% thought their asses were fine and they would have married him anyways.



xD! NICE!

*gigglesnort* >3
PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 11:23 pm


That reminds me of the old "******** as the most versatile word evaaaarrr" thign that was floating around a while ago.

Kudos to your dad. rofl

MoonTree

Ursine Friend


Seranin

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 12:15 am


MoonTree
That reminds me of the old "******** as the most versatile word evaaaarrr" thign that was floating around a while ago.

Kudos to your dad. rofl


It at first reminded me of the Monty Python "The Word ********" xD

Yeah, my dad is cool xO
PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:17 am


rofl

Pretty Handsome Awesome

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Seranin

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 11:56 am


Pretty Handsome Awesome
rofl


Glad it made your day a little better >3
PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 1:15 pm


Here's a forward I got like a year ago!

Quote:
Amore' - Ursula LeGuin

When the moon hits your eye,
Like a big pizza pie,
That's amore.
When an eel bites your hand,
And that's not what you planned,
That's a moray.
When our habits are strange,
And our customs deranged,
That's our morés.
When your horse munches straw,
And the bales total four,
That's some more hay.
When Othello's poor wife,
Becomes stabbed with a knife,
That's a Moor, eh?
When your sheep go to graze,
In a damp marshy place,
That's a moor, eh?
When your boat comes home fine,
And you tie up her line,
That's a moor, eh?
When you ace your last tests,
Like you did all the rest,
That's some more "A"s!
When on Mt. Cook you see,
An aborigine,
That's a Maori.
Alley Oop's homeland has,
A space gun with pizzazz,
That's a Moo ray.
A comedian ham,
With the name Amsterdam,
That's a Morey.
When your chocolate graham,
Is with marshmallows crammed,
That s'more, eh.
When you've had quite enough,
Of this dumb rhyming stuff,
That's "No more!" eh?

xD I love this one, and I figured it fits since Valentine's Day is coming up. Hehe.

Syrinx330

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Seranin

PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:43 pm


OMFG Syrinx that's awesome XD!

I love that song though

*goes to listen to the actual That's Amore! song* >3

Oh, and here's some more stuff my dad sent me XD

(featured in my next post!)
PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 2:45 pm


Another E-Mail my Daddeh Sent Me:


Difference in cat/dog Diary


The Dog's Diary

8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!


The Cat's Diary

Day 983 of my captivity.


My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape.

In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am.

Bastards!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.


Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.

I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges.

He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return.

He is obviously retarded.

The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe ----- for now...


xD!



Seranin


Syrinx330

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PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 4:57 pm


-dies laughing-

I find that extremely funny because it seems so totally true at times. I mean, my dogs are happy no matter what! We can't have cats because my mother is allergic to them, but my friend's cat seems really cynical. Its an outdoor cat but it'll break into the house through my friend's window to her room. Hehe, I'm going to send this one to my friend and see if she likes it. Though, she'll probably think her iguana fits the description of the cat more than her cat does. She doesn't like her iguana...and the iguana doesn't like her either.
PostPosted: Sun Feb 10, 2008 6:20 pm


My brother's old iguana, Ziggy, was an orange iguana who loved getting high with my brother xD

But he died D: He was really old ;-;

I MISS ZIGGY crying

Seranin

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The Purple Penguin Society-A Female Only Guild

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