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 Posted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 9:27 am
Howdy all, good day to those who still remember me and nice to meet you to those who don't and new acquaintances. I've been MIA on Gaia for some time now and I just started to get back on and try to get back into the swing of things... hmm, so how's a good way to start my journey back into Gaia, why with another one of those goofy please gimme advice threads.
Well a long ways back when I just finished High school I got in a bad relationship with a girl that was verbally abusive and just all around a shitty person... I have no tolerance for drugs, even pot! Anyway after that I got really desperate and depressed but things started to look up when my friend Jenna needed some help, she needed someone who could help her move all her stuff up to Little Rock, the city where the college we both go to is now. Anyway me and Jenna had a teeny weeny bit of history, as well as a huge crush on her at the time, and well for a while I thought she liked me, then I realize I was just getting used again, seems to be a pattern. Anyway I do owe her a little, she put a good word in for me at work and she did give me a place to stay for a while, the rent was low so even I could afford it. She always bugged me to run errands for her and her mum, no just no, I moved out of my house so I could get my own time, not get put on a leash by someone else.
Grab some pop corn this goes on for a while.
About 4 weeks into the semester I get dumped and cheated on by a friend I'd known for like 6 years, possibly 5, I can't remember if me and her met in 6th or 7th grade. So I was to the point where the fetal position and crying were a regular occurrence. Things started to just snowball as my grades came in, programming is just not my thing. This is just a funny side note to me, the girl that cheated on me was actually a complete whore, at first I was distraught that she ******** someone else, then I found out she had a really nasty history, the skank lost her virginity at 9. eek Yeah, after I found out how big a whore she was I stopped feeling so glum.
This does have a mildly happy ending.
Well I'd been trying to make friends on campus and I made one really good friend at work, her name is Zandra. She's so super nice and helped me really get over my slump. Don't jump to conclusions, Zandra is 6 years older than me and has a boy friend. Anyway as me and her got to know each other she started telling me about a girl that I worked with named Emily. I'd met her a few brief times, she was a brutally quiet and shy girl from what I could tell. Really she's just quiet, but to me quiet seems like shy, ehh. Anyway a few awkward meeting later me and her start to hit it off, I mean I admit the first time I saw her I was fairly intrigued. What can I say, cute geeky girl who rides a scooter around campus, I'm more than curious. I learned how she was just a sweet innocent nerdy girl, she loved DBZ and what not with a passion and was infinitely smarter than anyone I'd ever met before.
I'm starting to get the idea that I'm long winded.
Anyway, I've known her for 4 or so months now. I mean me and her hang out just about every week, and not too mention always talk some at work. Heh, she even invited me to spend new years with her and her family back in December. Here's the thing, I completely admit I've fallen for her... thing is I dunno if I should, I mean look back at the pattern, I mean this girl may seem wonderful... but I'm just worried something will be wrong. I mean in 4 months she's never been anything but nice and fun to be around, that geeky fun that I crave. XD
What I'm getting at is I think I like her as more than a friend, but I feel wrong for wanting to be, like I'm not good enough for her, and I have no idea, and I mean not even a remote hint, I've even asked her best friend if she's ever hinted at it and she's clueless too... yes I realize I'm bad at making point. I like her I just don't know if she likes me. sweatdrop
Just from that mess above I think any advice might be nice. eek
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Posted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 5:55 pm
sorry for taking so long to reply. XP
a healthy streak of skeptism is good for any college student to survive the risky waters of relationships.
my advice is that its worth a shot.
just let her know whats up... that you like her (no need to dump everything on at once its a dumb thing to do.) and see where it goes from there.
that might be a bit of a risk considering you said that she seems like the resclusive type at first glance. but she seems comfortable enough with you where you can be more open about what you talk about.
as the cliche goes, "better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all"
i personally think that if she invited you to new years with the family (did anything happen?!) that it MIGHT be an indicator.
yeah past experiences tend to make us just give up on what we want for fear of rejection, but if you dont come to a terms with it (putting it behind you would be the best example) then you could miss on a grand opportunity.
that became my problem and the girl im trying to pursue right now is still around, but because of my inability to act and my fear of the past repeating itself, im working with a rocky bridge to try and cross now.
is she worth it? life never gives you the answers but you never find any if you dont dig into the ground (and pick up a few bruises along the way)
besides, its college, no need to rush out and find ms. right off the bat. friends make better girlfriends than strangers.
hope that made some sense haha.
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Posted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 10:01 pm
Well no, nothing really happened, we just kind of watched movies and messed with solving a few jig saw puzzles. New years was fun, but no, nothing happened... I wanted something too, but I'm sorry that's just weird to try something on a girl that's that shy... hell it's up to her to begin with wether or not I try anything.... does that make sense or am I rambling?
Well Valentines day is almost here and I've been doing a little planning, I'm just gonna be simple and give her a card, a simple poem that says I kinda like her more than friends. I swear it's not one of those poems that screams stalker love, god it took so many re-writes to get it to sound well... nice, but not weird.
She is a bit reclusive, but more or less personality wise, she does get out plenty, but she's not a social butterfly I guess. I mean Zandra and I are hanging out with her like every weekend... actually, I think weekend before last was one of the first time I didn't see her at... no wait, I went to a folk band thing at some Buddhist place... yeah that sounds odd, but it was a lot of fun.
It's not like I'm looking for Ms. Right... I just happened to meet someone who's right on the money. I mean the first time I saw her I thought she was cute, she was cool as soon as I talked to her... and well I never really got to know her past being an aquaintance. It was all because of my friend Zandra that I got to know her, and well it's just been a blast, I mean Emily has really become one of the best friends I've ever made. I feel weird, but good, about liking her this way... sweatdrop
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