|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Sun Aug 01, 2004 11:36 pm
Yes, this is something I whipped up in a couple of short few minutes, then revised later. I thought it was interesting enough so now I am exposing it. Could you please rate it and possibly attempt to interpret it? I always liked seeing how another viewed my work. Thank you ^_^
Silence's Code
When does the voice of wonder
First trace the mind's lips?
In the silence before dawn
Does it sleep soundly with you?
Or as the day leaves
Does the voice awaken and start weaving
All the dreams you dream while sleeping?
Ever present,
It never truly dissipates.
Only quiets as you wonder
Where it went.
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 6:41 am
o_O I didn't think it would be so hard to get a rating with 96 members
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 7:04 am
Nice and descriptive. It doesn't rhyme that much, but most poems usually don't. Kinda hard to trace exactly what the poem is about, but it has a kind of underlying mystery to it. 3nodding So in short, I like it.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 8:27 am
Black Waltz 0 Nice and descriptive. It doesn't rhyme that much, but most poems usually don't. Kinda hard to trace exactly what the poem is about, but it has a kind of underlying mystery to it. 3nodding So in short, I like it. Thankee! It doesn't rhyme, but if you look closely, you'll see a certain syllable count so that it flows better than disjointed prose does. The poem uses a lot of figurative language, I know. Eh heh, sorry ^_^;
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 12:22 pm
My poems never rhyme. I don't know why but it always works out like that. Your poem's great, really interesting. 3nodding
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Aug 02, 2004 3:12 pm
merlinssister My poems never rhyme. I don't know why but it always works out like that. Your poem's great, really interesting. 3nodding Thanks much ^_^
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2004 9:05 pm
eh heh... double post. sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Aug 03, 2004 9:09 pm
3nodding It WAS a short and sweet poem. It flowed well and wasn't overly descriptive, which can get annoying, and the brief rhyming phrases were just right. Nice idea, too. Me likey. whee biggrin
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2004 3:31 am
I liked it , it had a certain mystery to it.
It was a perspective poem.
or it could deal with regular life it was a very good poem.
It was as you said short and very sweet.
In a good way: The flavor sour appple.
I have no idea why I just said that.
good day.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2004 1:12 pm
Eripsa Black Waltz 0 Nice and descriptive. It doesn't rhyme that much, but most poems usually don't. Kinda hard to trace exactly what the poem is about, but it has a kind of underlying mystery to it. 3nodding So in short, I like it. Thankee! It doesn't rhyme, but if you look closely, you'll see a certain syllable count so that it flows better than disjointed prose does. The poem uses a lot of figurative language, I know. Eh heh, sorry ^_^; Yay for blank verse ((nonrhyming poetry with rythm))!!! It has the feel of someone who just found out something really crappy happened, like, "Why is there pink lipstick on the pillow? I wear red" type of thing.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Aug 04, 2004 4:56 pm
Thanks everyone! ^_^
I don't think it has a sad feeling, just a more of a "can't be answered question but we ask anyway" feel.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Reply
