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I'd like this topic to be taken with an open mind rather than a firm view of wrong doing and adultery.



I am 24 and have a wonderful fiance. He's kind, amusing, handsome and honest, along with many more positive qualities. I am in the deepest feelings of euphoria when I am with him.
The downside to our relationship would be the sexual side.


- His mouth can easily open wide enough to swallow a 2 liter jug, and unfortunately, my face.
Mine could be described as quarter size. Obviously kissing can become an issue if he isn't careful.
- I don't think he understands he's more than twice my size. He may have that small/large dog syndrome. You know, big dogs are lapdogs and little ones are fierce guardians of the suburban household? Yeah, he's the big guy, and he likes to greet me in the morning with a nice warm cuddle laying his body on my chest.
- Love making has never been an enjoyable act with this man. I have one hell of a libido and as much as I'm in love, I never leave pleasured.
- Hair. It's all over the place and a complete turn off. There is no open skin area from his chest down with the exception of his back, which I rarely see during love making.



I know, I know - "tell him what's wrong." I do, and it works for a while.
Perhaps sexual training is in order? Or, for now, a quick fix. We both know a real handsome fellow, and my fiance agrees. I have discussed a sexual relationship with this man(whom I have met through friends of friends. A sexual relationship would not harm a relationship with any peers we may encounter), but not with my fiance. He is very attractive but would not be good relationship material, so I'm not worried about that and my fiance shouldn't be either. He is not a jealous man and has demonstrated that through many events in our time knowing each other.

With all that said, I know my fiance allow this affair to go on, but I still have some questions:




- Is there anything I can do to make it fulfilling for all three parties? I don't want my fiance to feel as if he's missing out.
- How do you feel about this situation and how would you alter it if you were in my place?
- Is it truly possible to have a [future] good relationship with your husband and a sexual partner, not all in one body?
I refuse to have a sexual unsatisfying existence.


EDIT: Let me make one thing clear: There is no way these two men will touch each other in a sexual manner. LOL. I'd love that, but it won't happen.

To be honest, I'm not sure if it's healthy to initiate a polygamous relationship if it's because you aren't sexually satisfied with your fiance. If it's a lifestyle choice responsibly done with everyone consenting and knowing precisely what the circumstances are, go for it. I could be wrong, but the circumstances you are presenting seem to be different and on a less stable foundation.

I definetely don't think you should look to this type of relationship to fix things with your fiance, or to substitute your lack of satisfaction in the sack. If you really want to address the problems, your best bet might be to hit up a counselor or take control for a period of time in the bedroom. When you do, be sure to explicitly tell him what you want, exactly how you like it, what's good and what isn't. It might take awhile, but it could work.

This could develop into a much more serious problem, and a quick fix should not be in order. It's one thing to accept this lifestyle with your partner and invite another in, and it's entirely another to go to another man because you aren't feeling satisfied enough. Somehow, I doubt your fiance is informed of your motives. Do you really think he'd be 100% okay with it if he knew you were only going this because he can't please you? I would think this would hurt a lot of people, even if they were accepting of such a lifestyle.

If I were in your situation, I wouldn't participate in the solution you are presenting. I'm all for others practicing polygamy, but I am fiercely adverse to it being introduced in my marriage. If all else failed and trying to tell him what I liked didn't work, I would be very honest and tell him that what he's doing isn't working for me, and that needs to change. Very likely, I'd book us some time with a counselor, because it sometimes takes professional help to n** the problem in the bud.

Bump for Euphoria.